


Secrets Come Out

by SuperWhoAvengeTrekLock



Series: Supernatural As Told by Me: If Cas Was Always There [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: John Winchester comes back, John reacts, M/M, Season Finale, Sexual Content, The Colt - Freeform, Vampires, a bit of violence, sam having visions, slight angst, yellow eyes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-03-30
Packaged: 2018-09-27 09:23:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 54,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9997268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperWhoAvengeTrekLock/pseuds/SuperWhoAvengeTrekLock
Summary: The Winchesters' secrets are finally coming out. Sam tells John and Cas about his visions, Dean tells his Dad about Cas, John tells Sam and Dean definitively what happened to their mother while digesting the news about Cas... all the while poor Castiel is just caught in the middle of the Winchester circus.





	1. Sam's Secret

**Author's Note:**

> Alright! As I promised, this fic is going to be multi-chaptered as it is going to go right until the end of season one and then my next fic is going to pic up in season 2! I hope you guys are liking this as much as I am.

_ The smog and steam of the buildings billowed out of the pipes and then through the alley before it found it’s way up into the sky. It was dark out in the night but the street lamp in the mouth of the alley allowed enough light to be able to see.  _

_ It wasn’t a very wide alley. An average sized person could probably reach out and touch both sides, both walls of either building. And then of course there was the stench of it. It was pungent in the air; putrid where trash had molded and decayed. It was enough to assault anyones nose that dared enter the tiny passage. _

_ That being said, a short man slowly emerged from the fog, looking all around the alley even though there wasn’t much to see. His nose immediately wrinkled from the smell but it was evident that he tried not to let something as trivial as smell bog him down. _

_ He stepped forward into a bit more of the light, revealing that he had dirty blonde hair that was slicked back and tucked behind his ears, his eyes a piercing hazel as he gazed down the aisle of pavement; squinting as if trying to see something before his head whipped behind him at a noise. He looked up to see the street lamp flickering. _

_ He was cautious, on edge as he clenched his fists, dying to be anywhere but here. A noise caught his attention and he turned once more. “Hello?” he questioned.  _

_ He stood tall despite the fear that was running through his veins and making his hair stand up. The small space was clearly making him uncomfortable but instead of turning and running, he moved deeper into the pocket between the buildings.  _

_ “I came like you said,” he called.  _

_ His breathing was even while his hand was shaking and another noise had him looking back towards where he’d come from but he moved deeper. He peered through, hoping to see a continuation of the alley but when he made it to the brickwall at the end, he sighed.  _

_ When he turned, suddenly, there was a woman behind him and she smirked.  _

_ “You said you would tell me where I could find him. My–” _

_ “Didn’t mommy and daddy ever teach you not to play with grown up things? You shouldn’t be shouting out such personal information,” she said before she grinned, her eyes turning black.  _

The image seemed to shake itself from Sam’s vision before he sat bolt upright in bed, panting a little. He sat there a moment and took in where his eyes landed, reminding himself that he was in the motel room with Cas and Dean. They were in the other bed. He looked over as if making sure, seeing them curled around each other in their sleep. 

He laid back as his mind processed the vision, processed what he saw. He stared up at the ceiling as he remembered the pure fear he’d felt in the man that had been in the laneway. When he had those visions, it was hard for him to truly figure out what was going on until he came out of it but this was different. He’d felt the fear as soon as the vision had started. 

What was worse? This wasn’t the first time he’d seen the man. Usually when he had these visions, they had something to do with what had happened to him and their family when his mother died in his nursery. When he’d had a dream about the family in their old house, it had come true. Then again with a man named Max in Michigan. These weren’t usually random. But with this man… it was different. 

Sometimes he would see the man driving, see the man walking down the street. Sometimes he would even see him moving around the house where he lived. Lately it had been a lot of him in the car, seemingly angry about something or sad. This… this had been the first dream he’d seen the man with a demon. 

He didn’t quite know what to do…

  
  


Castiel rubbed his hands over his face as he digested what he was being told. It was a lot to take in. He’d only had a few hours of sleep, their last drive being a bumpy and windy one for whatever reason, and then of course there was Dean blasting his music and making both him and Sam suffer because if he couldn’t sleep then neither could they. It had been awful. 

At this point, he was not awake enough to function. He needed food, coffee, and a shower, presumably. But was he getting any of that? No. He was getting something so much stranger. 

“So you’re telling me…” he began as he leaned against the counter in the kitchenette. “That Sam has  _ visions _ and you didn’t think this was something you needed to tell me? A few towns ago I was being questioned because I was handy with a knife and he’s That’s So Raven and  _ I’m _ getting questioned?” he asked. He didn’t mean to have an attitude, but it was mighty early. 

“Calm down there, grumpy,” Dean muttered as he pressed a cup of coffee into Cas’ hands, knowing Castiel enough by now to know that the man meant no malice. Sam was already like a brother to him. “We don’t know why he gets the visions. But Sam isn’t a  _ something _ .”

“Sorry, Sam,” he mumbled. “Just tired.”

“Don't be. I get it,” he nodded, though he watched his brother. 

He didn’t know if Dean realized how he was looking at him but it… it hurt. It was how Dean always looked at him when he talked about these visions or having them. It was why he didn’t tell his brother originally that he was having random dreams about some guy. It was also why he didn’t tell Dean when they first started back on the road together that he’d had visions of Jess’ death before she died. For weeks. He was afraid of getting that look. 

It made him feel like a freak of nature. And that was how Dean dealt with him. With Max… Dean had poked fun, told him to bend a spoon and that they should head to Vegas, Atlantic city– something. That he would be their ticket to big numbers. But he could tell that Dean was somewhat  _ scared _ of him. He wasn’t stupid. He knew his brother and Dean was frightened of him. More frightened of what he might have been able to do… like if he went off the deepend like Max did. Dean was afraid that his brother was going to turn into something to hunt.

Part of him wondered why he hadn’t told Cas. He wondered if this was another instance of it being his secret to tell… or if it was just because Dean wanted to forget it ever existed in the first place. Maybe he’d hoped it would go away or he wouldn’t bring it around Cas. But now he didn’t know why...

Sam cleared his throat as he continued. “You know, I questioned it too the first time it happened. And the second. I just… I get these feelings, I see these things, and they come true,” he stuttered out. He swallowed a little roughly, his adam's apple bobbing. “I don’t… really know how to explain it.”

Castiel breathed as he picked the crud out of his eyes, trying to rub away the sleep but he settled for leaning against Dean who put an arm around his waist. 

“Okay, psychic boy. Tell me what you saw,” Dean said. 

After a pointed look from Sam to his brother, he explained the vision to both of them and everything he saw, even saying that this wasn't the first time he'd dreamt about him. 

“Well hey, that's something,” Dean offered as he let go the fact that Sam had been dreaming about the same guy and neglected to tell him. “Your visions are usually tied with tragedy. Usually someone’s gettin’ ganked or doing the ganking. You sure you didn't just see a hot guy somewhere and have a wet dream?” He smirked and tried to make light of the situation. 

Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean,” he said. “The thing is that this dream did end badly. He was… well it seemed like he was  _ meeting _ with a demon. He's looking for someone and when he saw the demon, he looked almost relieved for a second before the whole black eyes thing. I think this guy is in trouble, Dean.” 

Dean nodded, taking in the new piece of information. Damn he hated demons. They were the lowest of the low when it came to monsters. No way to kill them and they loved to get all up in you and mess around with your life while you sit shotgun and watch everything burn to the ground. He’d talked to more than one hunter that it had happened to and it didn’t sound like a good time. 

“Alright, so did you see anything? Did you… get a sense of where you were?” he asked his brother. “Maybe a shop we can look up or a couple street signs we can find on a map that correspond?”

At that, Sam seemed to deflate. “No,” he said. He’d tried to remember, tried to see past the fog in his dream and see the street sign but he knew it was no good. There were millions of streets in America. Most of them were common from town to town he didn’t even know how many there were in each state with the same names. It was no help unless he’d seen more than one. .

Dean nodded as he sucked his top lip into his mouth to drag his teeth across the skin. “So you… got us out of bed, in the middle of the night after we’d driven  _ all _ day… for a dream you  _ think _ might be a vision but even if it was… you don’t have a lead as to where we would even go to save this guy?” he asked before he nodded as Dean and Cas seemed to put their coffee cups down in sync. “Yeah, we’re going back to bed.”

Sam stood up just as they passed him, climbing into the bed. He held his hands up in a somewhat confused gesture. “So that’s it? You’re just gonna… give up, go to bed? When someone needs us?” he asked the two, a little disappointed in their approach to the matter. He expected some urgency from Cas at least but nothing? Not an ounce of care?

“Someone always needs us, Sam,” Dean said as he got in the bed, wrapping the blankets around him and Cas and dragging his boyfriend into him. “Get us some kind of location and we can talk.”

“I hate to say it but Dean is right, Sam,” Castiel said softly. 

“Oh you hate to say it, do you?” Dean quipped. 

“Hush. I just mean that until we know where we’re going, we can’t go anywhere. Maybe go back to sleep. Maybe you’ll see more. Or maybe not. I don’t know,” he shook his head. “But like I said, Dean is right and if we can’t figure out a way to help him then we have to help someone else.”

Sam huffed as he watched the two get comfortable in bed before turning the lamp off on the bedside. He plopped down in the bed, his eyes cast up to the ceiling. There had to be something he could do.

Without a foolproof plan in sight, he closed his eyes and tried to remember the dream. He tried to remember everything he’d seen in the dream but ultimately he’d just fallen asleep again. 

Days passed and Sam remained worried about the man he’d seen in a vision. He didn’t know what to do. Dean and Cas were barely listening to him and he had no knowledge of where the man was, where he was from. He couldn’t do anything except sit there and wait. He’d even tried to force a vision. He’d Googled a bunch of things, information about how psychics did it. But he  _ wasn’t _ a psychic. And so everything ultimately failed.

Castiel had been the one to find the case they were on. It had been a D-list ghost hunt about a woman who felt betrayed because as an engagement present, she’d given a locket with a piece of her to her fiancé. In turn, the man had turned and  given it to his secret lover; another man. She’d taken her own life from the embarrassment when the secret came out but the jewelry box it had been kept in for so many years had been made of iron. It had been like a prison to her. Until the jewelry box had been opened when the new buyers of the home had found it buried deep in the attic, someone probably trying to forget it existed. 

It was nothing too serious, not something Sam hadn’t handled hundreds of times. And yet… in the middle of fighting with the ghost, in mid swing of his rod of iron, he’d begun to feel like his head was splitting open. In the moment he’d thought that maybe it the ghost. He thought that just maybe she was stronger than they’d given her credit for but he was incredibly wrong. 

“Sam!” Castiel called as he watched Sam freeze, whatever he was going through seeming to bring him to his knees but in the meantime, the ghost seemed to take it as invitation. The decorations on the wall picked that moment to jiggle, a decorative hatchet– that seemed pretty sharp even still– went flying toward the younger. 

Castiel had reacted without thought, knocking Sam out of the way with just about an inch to spare. “Sam? Sam are you alright?”

“Hey!” Dean called, making the ghost look up to where Dean had ahold of what they had determined she was attached to: a locket with a lock of her hair in it that she’d given as a gift to the man that betrayed her. Dean flicked his lighter open and held the piece of hair over the flame. “Time to move on, sweetheart,” he said before he lit the lock of hair up and threw it into the fire place. 

Dean and Castiel watched as she flamed out, screaming as she did so. When she was gone, Castiel looked to Dean prior to looking back to Sam, but the younger hunter was twitching and groaning in pain with his eyes closed. 

“He’s having another vision. He does this,” Dean said. 

“Another thing that would have been nice to know,” he muttered, that being the last of what Sam heard before the image shook from the house that they were into something to completely different. 

 

_ The room was dark, wherever it was. It was so pitch black that not even eyes would adjust to this type of darkness; void of light. That was until the light streamed in from the door that was opened at the far end of the room, the demon that had shown itself to the man from the alleyway coming in. _

_ As soon as the light pooled in, it could be seen that this room wasn’t just a room but it was clearly some kind of abandoned factory or building. It looked like the abandoned buildings that could be found down by shipping yards; vast expanses of just room.  _

_ But this room held something different. In the center, sat the same dirty blonde that had also been in the alley, tied to the chair he was in.  _

_ He was bloody now. At first glance you might not have been able to tell but the way the red stained his blue jeans as well as his jacket, it was unmistakably blood. His hair was no longer slicked back like it had been. As he slumped against the restraints that kept him there, distinctly tired from whatever ringer the demon had put him through, his hair hung down; matted and tangled, blood even mixed in.  _

_ When the door opened, he didn’t even move before he was plunged into darkness once again, the boots of the demon clacking closer slowly, not giving much of an idea of what was coming for him but there was no sense that he moved.  _

_ That sense was correct when another light turned on: a lamp. The lamp lit up a table of torture devices that mostly looked for show and a scare seeing as none of them had blood on them. But demons loved their torture sessions. It was only a matter of time.  _

_ “You know,” the demon said, “You can stop all of this with just a few words. Where is he?” _

_ He didn’t answer. In fact, the man sitting there gave no indication that he was even alive except the slow breathing that was probably keeping him as calm as he could get in a situation like this.  _

_ “Did you get a little blood in your ears?” she growled as she stalked closer and yanked his head up by his hair, the man only giving out an irritated huff at being handled like that. _

_ When she brought his face up into the light, the true toll that the demon had taken on him was evident. He had a bruised cheek and an eye that was nearly closing. Dried blood had crusted on his face under his nose and on his mouth. There were cuts on his cheek as well as on his lip. He’d taken quite the beating.  _

_ And now, even with the prospect of another in his near future, he stayed quiet. _

_ The woman clenched her jaw. “Fine. You wanna play the quiet game?” she asked as she went over to the table. She hummed softly as her hands hovered over the instruments, stopping at one that looked like a grand version of a cheese grater. “You play that game but I’m going to play another,” she said in a domineering tone as she stepped closer.  _

The image shook once again and once out of the warehouse he’d found himself in with the man and the demon, he gasped for air a little. His head was killing him even after he’d been pulled from it. 

“Sammy? Sammy, you there?” Dean asked as he looked into his brother’s eyes, trying to figure out if Sam was really awake or not.  __

With his eyes open, he took in the setting around him and saw that they were still in the house where they’d been hunting the ghost but he was sat in an arm chair. As his memories came back to him and he fully understand where he was and what they’d been doing. He jumped a little. “The ghost–”

“Taken care of,” Castiel said gently. “Dean lit her up. We’re all fine. But you almost weren’t. You almost took a hatchet to the back of the head, Sam.”

Sam closed his eyes as he recalled that too. He recalled going down when the vision had it. “Shit,” he muttered. “I’m… I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. You just had us worried,” Castiel spoke truthfully. 

It wasn’t unclear how much Sam meant to him. He didn’t mean to the same to him as Dean did, obviously. But Dean was his boyfriend. Sam, however, was shaping up to be the best friend he’d ever had. He’d even go so far as to say that the younger was like a brother to him. He meant a lot to Castiel. So when he’d seen his new brother about to lose his head, it had shaken him. 

Dean was just as shaken, though he was better at hiding it than Cas was. It wasn’t that he couldn’t show concern for his brother but they were a lot more apt to tease each other than Cas about fretting over them. Dean and Sam could get away with calling each other a bitch or a jerk but Castiel wouldn’t have had that. So he let Cas voice his own worries for Sam to answer to. 

Sam breathed out a sigh as he began to relax. He was glad the job had gotten done but he hated to admit to himself that he’d screwed up. He’d nearly gotten himself killed, maybe Cas or Dean in the process. Something like that couldn’t happen again… it just couldn’t. 

“You wanna tell us what you saw?” Castiel questioned. 

Sam appeared dazed for a moment as he thought about that question before he nodded. “Yeah. Yeah,” he continued to nod. “It was him. Same guy as before. He’s being tortured by the demon that was with him in the alley,” he recounted. “They’re keeping him in some kind of warehouse in the dark and they’re trying to get information out of him… they’re looking for someone. They asked ‘where is he?’ but he said nothing. He’s in real trouble guys.”

Castiel nodded, hating the thought that there was someone out there they’d had to neglect but when Sam had told them about this man and the vision before, he didn’t have anything solid to give them to go on. They didn’t have a place or any kind of indication of one. A dark alleyway in America were a dime a dozen. 

Sam looked between them and swallowed. “No,” he whispered and immediately he felt a wave of disappointment roll over his entire body. There was a guy somewhere getting  _ tortured _ by demons and he was meant to save him– that had to be what the visions were for weren’t they? And yet every single time he had one of his visions he couldn’t even get a glimpse of where he was. Nothing. It was becoming so frustrating. 

Sam stood up, fists clenched. The hunter was more than a little beside himself at this very moment. How was he supposed to help anyone if whatever gave him these powers didn’t give him the tools to help people? How was he supposed to live with the fact that this guy was probably dying and he couldn’t do anything about it?

“I need to go,” Sam muttered as he moved toward the door. 

“Sam–” Castiel stood but Dean caught him by the arm. 

“Trust me. Let him go,” he said softly. “He needs to cool down and then he’ll be fine.”

Castiel sighed softly as he watched the man leave the house with a bang. He didn’t know where he was going or why he had to leave but he wanted to go after his friend. He wanted to console him and tell him it was going to be alright. But he supposed Dean was right. He just needed some time and a little space.


	2. Sam's Secret and his Tribulations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay! This chapter is going to start out really weird from the last place we left it and I promise, you've not missed anything!

Castiel’s head tipped toward the ceiling as he moaned. His hands gripped Dean’s shoulders while his legs wrapped behind Dean’s back so that he was seated on Dean’s cock. He was lost in the bliss of the moment, feeling Dean inside him and hitting his sweet spot as they moved with one another in perfect unison.

Dean was sitting upright, his fingers splayed out across Castiel’s back and gripping the skin as he held his boyfriend close. His lips caressed the column of Castiel’s neck when his lover tipped his head back toward the ceiling. 

Their bodies together in a sensual and passionate pace. “Dean,” he whispered as he panted slightly, his whole body on fire as he felt Dean in every nerve. 

The position they were in allowed them to see one another so clearly and take things slower than they had even the night they met one another. Dean always thought that having sex like this, taking time with one another, making sure each other had every pleasure– he thought it was nonsense. He thought it didn’t exist. He was sure that ‘making love’ was a myth that people told others about to make them feel better about committing such an act that, at the end of the day, was dirty and filled with lust. 

But this was so different. He could feel every part of Castiel and the man wrapped around him looked into his eyes like that was where the moon and stars were held. But he understood because he knew that he was looking back at him like he’d created the sun and put it in the sky. He could feel them giving all they had to one another and the other was only giving it back. 

Castiel ran his hands over his body before he brought himself down to kiss Dean. They’d been at this so long that sweat tried it’s hardest to cool their bodies, making some parts of them stick together whereas others weren’t close enough. The hair on both of them was mated to their foreheads and to the napes of their necks. Some might have found it disgusting or gross. But Castiel found it worth taking in, worth remembering; the way Dean looked at this moment. 

As he let out a breathy moan, he and Dean shared the same air, tasting each other in a newly erotic way. The whole experience was new. They’d never had sex like this before. He didn’t know what brought it on, either. He didn’t know if it was the simple fact that Cas had come so close to getting killed or if it was just the wind down of the hunt in general. But he had to admit he liked it. 

There was that moment, the moment that he was in where he was already wishing they could do this again but he _ knew _ the way this felt, the way it happened so naturally, it could never be replicated. And so they made the best of it. 

Castiel’s breath hitched, their lips brushing together as they gasped for hair but didn’t want to be out of each other’s immediate space. They wanted– needed to be as close as possible in this moment. 

“Dean,” he whispered. “I’m…” he whined as he trailed off. “I’m so close.”

Dean nodded, catching his lips as eh too felt himself nearing his orgasm. “Come with me, Cas,” he whispered back to him. “Let me hear you. Let me feel you. Give me all of you.”

Dean’s words were like music to him; moving around him and through him and he nodded back at him, telling him that not only did he hear him but that it was all he wanted. He wanted them to come at the same time, to feel each other in every way. 

“Dean… baby, come,” he commanded in a soft voice. “Let go with me.”

Castiel connected their foreheads and he felt Dean speed them up just a little as he chased his orgasm and Cas did the same. When they let go, it was simultaneous. The feeling was unlike anything they’d ever felt as Dean gripped Castiel tightly to his body and Castiel held Dean back all the same. 

When their ogasms were done rocking through them, they sat there panting and catching their breath. The whole room around them spun but they had each other so it didn’t much matter if they were spinning or outright falling. 

Castiel smiled down at Dean as he began to come out of his state. He leaned in and kissed Dean softly, their lips puffed and red from the kissing done previously. “That…” he whispered. 

“Was amazing?” Dean finished with a breathy chuckle as he smiled at Castiel. 

“I was going to say… otherworldly… ethereal…” he grinned against his lips. “Heavenly, transcendental,” he listed as he kissed him. 

Dean laughed and held him close. He leaned back against the headboard of the motel bed. “Good to know I’m a fantastic lay,” he teased. 

Castiel grinned and kissed his jaw. “You are and you already knew that,” he muttered. 

Once they separated and Dean tossed the condom away, Castiel curled up under Dean’s arm, his head on his chest, simply basking in the afterglow of being with Dean. It was like something out of a story book. “Mm. I could fall asleep and never wake up right now. Just lay here with you forever.”

“You do know that’s death, don’t you–”

“Shhh,” Castiel cut him off. “Don’t ruin the moment with your truths.”

Dean smiled at him and kissed the top of his head. “I know what you mean… laying here with each other forever does have a nice ring to it. Get food brought to us… do that as many times as we want,” he whispered with a grin. 

Castiel laughed. “Yes. That would be the best part,” he hummed as he nuzzled deeper into his side. After a long while of sitting there, a long while of contemplating the events of their hunt, he’d gotten a little lost in his own thoughts. Somehow… they ended on Sam even in the position they were in. “I’m worried about him,” Castiel whispered quietly. 

Dean breathed out a soft sigh. He knew this was coming. He just didn’t know when. He ran his hand over Castiel’s back and arm soothingly. “Sam is fine,” he said with closed eyes. “He just needs some time, like I said–”

“Dean… it’s been a week and a half,” he sighed. “We haven’t seen him or heard from him since the last hunt.”

The hunter nodded as he let the air out through his nose. “I know, angel. I’m worried about him too, you know. He’s my little brother. It’s my job to take care of him. But he was so upset about that whole… guy getting tortured thing that if I know my brother, and I do, he’s holed up somewhere boozing and sleeping and trying to force another vision of the guy. I mean… I wish Sam wasn’t going through this… I do. But… so far we don’t really have a choice but wait for him to come back. He will when he’s ready. I’ll shoot him a text saying that we’re not going to track him if he texts back but you just wanna know that he’s okay. That sound fair, angel?” Dean asked. 

Castiel quirked his lips as he thought about it. He wanted Sam  _ home _ . And as far as he was concerned, home was with them. They were his home. And even as much as he didn’t like it, he knew Dean was right. Sam was a grown adult and he wasn’t going to come home just because Castiel was worried about him. Sam had to get through this in his own way. 

He took a moment before he nodded. “Okay. Yeah, okay. I’ll let it go. For now. But when you text him, I want you to relay to him that I am unhappy with him and when he comes back he is going to get an earful.”

Dean chuckled at the downright paternal way Castiel had adopted with Sam. He would tell Dean and Sam that the younger was like a brother to him but Dean was sure part of him had become like a parent to him with the way he and Dean took care of him. 

“Just try to get some sleep, angel. I’ll text him now and I’m sure in the morning he will have texted us back and you can be put at ease,” he said as he reached for his phone. He typed out a quick message that was just asking Sam if he was okay and to get back to them. “There. All sent,” he hummed as he kissed his forehead. 

Castiel smiled softly and nodded, reaching over and turning the lamp off. “Alright, baby. Night,” he whispered. 

Dean listened to Castiel fall asleep and he cast his eyes into the darkness, thinking about everything. He didn’t have the heart to tell Castiel that part of him was glad that Sam was gone. He was glad that Sam left them to handle this stuff themselves. He didn’t know if he belonged in all this. 

Some people might misconstrue that as malice or ill will but it simply wasn’t the case. Dean Winchester loved his little brother. That was all there was to it… but he would have been lying if he said that the first time Sam had one of these visions that it didn’t scare the hell out of him. It made him want to test his brother every way he knew how. He wondered if he should try to exorcise him or if he should get the iron. But he didn’t. He’d had to remain calm and try not to scare Sam as much as he was sure he already was. 

Then there was Cas. He was pretty sure that his feelings for the man in his arms was growing into very dangerous L-word territory. He didn’t know what to do on the matter. He didn’t know whether to embrace it or run from it. That being said, he couldn’t lose the other. No matter what, Castiel couldn’t get hurt. He would never forgive himself. So he didn’t know what Sam’s visions were but he’d had this feeling that he didn’t want them anywhere near his boyfriend. Not if Sam truly was some freak or something. 

He winced at his own thoughts as that ran through his head. No. his brother  _ wasn’t _ a freak. Maybe some freak was trying to get inside him or give him some sort of message but his brother wasn’t the freak. 

But, unfortunately, Dean didn’t know what was going on with Sam and his visions. He didn’t know if it was a family thing like maybe it had been something to do with their mom but he wouldn’t let himself think like that. He couldn’t let himself wonder even for a second if he’d inherited something like that as well. He was no psychic. He couldn’t be and he was sure that anyone that thought that of him would get a punch to the face. He was just a regular old human. He hunted the freaks and the monsters. 

That had been the reason he didn’t tell Castiel. He realized that he should have told his boyfriend that particular secret. But he’d been pushing so many things to the back of his mind, trying to get Castiel to see him for him and not the things he dealt with on a daily basis, not his tribulations, not his burdens. He wanted everything to be different with Cas. Instead he’d lied to him and he was still making up for that.

He tried to think about that instead of Sam. He tried to think about anything else that he may have been hiding from his lover, and it lulled him to sleep in the end. 

 

Sam opened his eyes slowly as the sun streamed in from the windows and directly into his eyes. He scrunched his face as he tried to block his eyes from such a sight but ultimately he’d had to get up and draw the blind. And now that he was standing, he was definitely up for good. 

He looked around the dirty motel room and debated going for a run. He liked to be healthy and stay fit… but every time he had a thought about doing anything that wasn’t working towards finding the man from his dreams and visions, he couldn’t bring himself to. He could eat, he could just barely sleep… but beyond those two things and using the bathroom, every moment of his life for the last week and a half had been about research. 

He’d not meant to leave Cas and Dean at first. He just needed a walk. He was angry and frustrated. Wouldn’t anyone be if they were forced to watch an innocent man die through some freak power he had no clue how they got it in the first place? It hurt him. As far as he knew, the man had done no wrong. He was just looking for someone, someone that was presumably important to him and a demon took advantage. 

It brought up so many question. Why were demons seeking this man out? What did they want? What did they think he knew? Who was he? And if most of his visions only ever had to do with his family, what did this man have to do with his family?

So many things had been running through his head that night that he’d just kept walking. Left his duffle bag behind and everything. He wasn’t sure how far he’d walked. He hadn’t looked or taken in his surroundings until a car had pulled up next to him on the road and asked him if he needed a ride to the next town. At that point, not knowing where he was, he just said yes so he didn’t have to spend the night in the dark walking down an empty road. 

After that he’d taken the first bus out of a passing town that didn’t even have a motel. He had no clue where he was going or where he was until he’d looked up and saw that he was still in the state of Arizona where they’d been on their hunt. He was just further away from Cas and Dean. 

He’d thought about calling, thought about sending a quick text that told them where he was. But then he half expected them to show up, Dean having traced his phone. But that never came… and he never reached out to tell them he was okay. He knew that at least Cas was probably worried but he knew Dean would talk him off the ledge. 

When he finally arrived at a motel he could afford, he bought the room for just a night. He’d rested and tried to think of what to do. Mostly he slept, hoping that would trigger a premonition or something. But after the first night and nothing had happened, he became much more determined. 

He bought the room out for just a couple more days and decided that research was in order. He found teas, special yoga poses, quick paced movements– he’d even tried subjecting himself to weird dishes and horrible online tutorials. He was in his own little world of torture and it was killing him.

But still he stayed. He thought that if he was ever going to have some sort of breakthrough, it was going to happen away from Cas and his brother. But there had been nothing since that night. Not a damn thing. It was so incredibly disconcerting. 

He’d panicked a little one night. He’d gone on a downward spiral of thinking that he should just give up. Obviously, the reason he was no longer seeing the man was because the man was dead. At that desperate time, it was the only logical explanation that he could come up with. Clearly he’d waited too long or something. 

But then there was also the fact that he’d only ever seen the man in danger… and he hadn’t seen him at all. Maybe he wasn’t in danger anymore. Maybe he got away or they set him free.

The second theory didn’t take long to run it’s course in Sam’s brain, knowing that the likelihood that had happened was about as good as a rhinoceros doing ballet. Sure, the man could have gotten away if he was really that good but a demon wouldn’t have let him go without a plan.

A week and a half, a dirty motel room, and a need for something that wasn’t pizza or Chinese food was coursing through his veins but the pure fear that he was going to miss something or do something wrong was still evident. 

Sam finally moved from his spot by the window, picking up some of the things in the room before he picked up his phone and turned it on. As soon as it had finished booting up, a text message from Dean came through and he read it, sighing to himself. 

Castiel was worried about him, just as he’d predicted. He knew his newest friend would be. He knew that if anyone was going to look past his visions and accept him… well it was Cas. No questions asked. Dean’s message didn’t say it, but he could tell that Castiel just wanted Sam to come back. He knew that, mostly, because Castiel had texted him about that before and he’d ignored it. 

He sighed again as he debated what to do before he put the phone down. The entire time he went to the bathroom, took a shower, brushed his teeth, and got dressed he was thinking about whether or not he should send a message to Cas or just to Dean or perhaps he should just  _ call _ Cas. 

But ultimately he grabbed his laptop and simply walked to the diner down the street. He had been sitting there, scrolling through his laptop when he looked at his phone just sitting there on the table. His leg shook under the table as he once again had an internal war with himself about to do. Before long, though, he sighed and picked it up. He scrolled through his contacts, his thumb hovering over Dean’s number before he decided against it.

Castiel looked down as his own phone rang and he smiled when he saw that it was Sam’s number. He answered it instantly. “Sam. Where are you? Are you alright? Do you need me and Dean to come and get you?” he asked. 

Sam chuckled at Cas’ doting voice before he heard Dean in the background telling Cas not to volunteer him for things. He rolled his eyes a little at Dean’s words. “I’m fine, Cas. Still in Arizona,” he said. 

Castiel put the phone on speaker so that he and Dean could both hear. The man with the angel name felt a weight lift off his shoulders at hearing Sam’s voice and at hearing that he was okay. He knew Dean wouldn’t say it but he knew that Dean was having his own peace at knowing that his brother wasn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. 

“What are you doing in Arizona still?” he asked as he and Dean packed their bags. Dean was busy looking for another case in the newspaper so if Sam needed them to come get him, now was the perfect time to do so. 

“I uh… I never left,” he said. “I just needed some space that night. Needed a little time to myself, you know?” he asked. 

Dean gave Castiel an ‘I told you so’ look and Castiel stuck his tongue out at his boyfriend in response. He’d never doubted that Dean was right as far as what Sam needed but he just needed to know that everything was okay and Sam wasn’t hurt somewhere. 

Sam muttered something to the waitress about more coffee before he tucked the phone between his ear and his shoulder and went back to his computer. “But where are you guys? Enjoying life without me?” he asked. 

“Never gotten laid so much, Sammy– ow, Cas!” Dean called as Castiel whacked him for saying such a thing to his brother. 

Sam laughed. “I kinda figured I would get a response like that as soon as it left my mouth,” he said. “Where are you guys?” he asked again, wanting to know in case he decided that today was the day he was leaving. 

“We’re in Nebraska packing up,” Castiel offered. “We just finished a case.”

Sam’s eyebrows raised a little and his fingers paused on the keys where he’d been typing. “You did? Wow… well I’m glad you guys didn’t miss a beat without me–”

“Oh we did. We were horribly off, arguing like crazy. Don’t go thinking something stupid like we don’t need you, Sam. I’ve been waiting for you to come home for days,” Castiel said. The last thing he needed was for Sam to think that they didn’t need him. They did. 

Sam smiled softly at that. He wondered if Castiel just knew him by now or if he was that smart because somehow he’d been able to pinpoint exactly what he was feeling. When Castiel had said that they’d finished a hunt, he wondered for a second if the two even needed him now that they were the dynamic hunting couple. But when Cas followed it up by saying that they needed him… it warmed him a little. 

“Well like I said, I’m in Arizona. I’m looking at some of the articles around you. You know where you’re going yet?” he asked. 

Dean shook his head even though Sam couldn’t see them as he folded the paper up. “Nothing. All I got here is a local newspaper,” he noted. “Nothing worth going after. May need to go back out and get some other papers.” 

“Well I got some online articles right here,” Sam said. “You want me to just read them off?” he asked, looking around and keeping his voice down as not to alert some of the customers. He was very thankful that he remembered to get a booth in the back so that he could remain nearly unseen. 

“Yeah. That sounds like a good plan. And anywhere we find, you’re going to meet us, Sam,” Castiel insisted. “I don’t like this whole states apart thing.” He remembered Dean and Sam telling him that right after they’d begun hunting again, Sam had gotten fed up with their Dad’s mystery messages and coordinates. He’d gotten tired of running after a cold trail and so he’d decided to go find him. He wondered how the two could separate after knowing what was out there. He didn’t want either of the brothers out of his sight and he’d had to deal with Sam out of his for nearly a week and a half. 

“Yes, sir,” he laughed. He grappled with himself in his head, wondering if he was ready. He wondered if he was ready to go back into the game and forget this guy that he hadn’t even seen in over a week anyway. But as he and Dean had taken to telling each other after a bad hunt; he couldn’t save everyone. He would just have to keep telling himself that. 

He cleared his throat as he went down the list of some of the things he was seeing on his computer. “Uh… I guess a woman in Iowa fell ten thousand feet from an airplane and survived,” he tried.

Dean rolled it over in his head before he answered. “Nah. That sounds a lot more like ‘that’s incredible’ over our kind of ‘Twilight Zone’ day to day bull.”

Sam hummed a response. “None of this really looks like our thing,” he mumbled. “Oh… but maybe this. A man in Boulder, Colorado by the name of Daniel Elkins was mauled in his home.”

Dean froze. “Elkins… Elkins, I know that name– why do I know that name?” he wondered out loud.

Castiel shrugged as he looked to him for a moment before Dean was heading over to his duffle bag as he looked for something, pulling out his father's journal as Sam kept talking. 

Sam shook his head. “Doesn’t ring any bells…” he stated. “But, the cops don’t know what to do with it. They were thinking maybe it was some kind of bear attack but now they’re saying that there were signs of robbery.”

Dean made a sound that told him he was still listening before he found the page he was looking for. He quickly got his phone and texted a picture of the page to Sam. “Sammy, check this out,” he said. “I sent you a text.”

Sam pulled his phone back from his shoulder and opened the text, his eyebrows going high as he looked at the picture. There on the page, so clearly from their Dad's journal was D. Elkins with a phone number written under it. “Huh,” he puffed out a noise. “You think it’s the same Elkins?” he asked Dean.

“Colorado area code,” Castiel said, getting a look from Dean. “What, I know things too,” he offered. 

“I say we check it out,” Dean proposed.

  
  


Sam pulled up in the stolen car to the address they’d been able to track down for Daniel Elkins. It hadn’t taken much for him to steal the car. Perhaps Dean was the car savvy one but he knew how to hotwire a car with the best of them. 

When he got out, he saw Castiel practically bounce as he moved and wrapped his arms around Sam. He’d not shut up to Dean their whole way to Colorado about how he was either going to give Sam a big hug when he saw him or he was going to give him the biggest lecture he’d ever heard. 

Sam chuckled and hugged his friend, the man that was shaping up to be his best friend. “I missed you too, Cas,” he said. 

Castiel pulled back suddenly and started whacking him, having decided on hugging  _ and _ lecturing. “Don’t you ever do that to me again. You couldn’t call? You couldn’t text? Not even just a message to say that you were  _ alive _ . You left that night and thought ‘oh I’ll just give the two people that care about me on a daily basis a stroke because I’m an idiot’?” Castiel asked, crossing his arms. 

Sam pouted as he rubbed his arm where Castiel had hit him. “I’m sorry, Cas. I just needed some time, like I said–”

“Time, my ass. Next time you need some time I  _ expect _ you to take two seconds of that time to check in so that we make sure you’re alive,” he said in a serious tone.

Sam was about to laugh it off when he looked to Dean and seeing that he wasn’t going to be a savior and they most certainly were not joking around. His brother looked just as serious and he pointed back to his boyfriend. “What he said.”

Castiel looked back at him as if awaiting a response. “Are we clear?”

Sam could have said no. He could have told Cas that he was a grown man and he didn’t have to answer him. He could have told Cas that they weren’t actually family and he didn’t need Castiel worrying about him. He could have given him an attitude and told him off...

He nodded. “Alright, Cas,” he said softly. “Alright. I will. I won’t go off without saying something again,” he promised. 

Castiel nodded. “That’s more like it,” he said.

Dean couldn’t help but smirk a little at his brother’s slightly wounded pride. He’d been telling Sam things like that for years and all he ever got was an attitude or a smartass remark. He was slightly happy that Cas could put so much fear into him that he agreed. “Alright. We good? Let’s see what we can see,” he said as he clicked on a flashlight.

As they entered the house, it was instantly unclear why the police had originally thought a bear attack had happened. Castiel got that they were in the mountains of Colorado but the entire house was… well it was kept as clean as it probably had ever been… There were stacks of things everywhere, a tidy mess if you will but that was pretty much it. And while Castiel didn’t know what bears were about, he was sure there would have been a whole lot more destruction. Castiel stepped in behind Dean slowly, making sure he didn’t touch too much as he was sure this was still a crime scene.

“Looks like the maid forgot to come,” Dean made light. 

Sam rolled his eyes at Dean’s words, stopping at the doorway. “Hey, guys… there’s salt here,” he announced. 

Castiel moved back to where Sam was, crouching down with him to check out the ring of salt that was there in front of the door. He frowned once again, this time in thought, wondering if the others were thinking it too.

Dean inspected what looked to be the living room, the first room that could be entered, finding a journal right there as he answered his brother. “Like, protection-against-demon’s salt or ‘oops I spilled the popcorn,’ salt?” he asked as the book caught more of his attention. Normally he would have left something like that alone but… it reminded him of the book he kept in his leather jacket pocket, the one his father scrawled in most of the time. 

“No, it’s clearly a ring,” Castiel clarified before he and Sam stood and looked around. 

“You think this guy was a player?” he asked.

“Definitely,” Dean said as the other two came up behind him.

“That looks a hell of a lot like dad’s,” Sam said. 

“Yeah, I know. It was why it caught my eye. But this one dates all the way back to the sixties,” he said, taking in the scrawls about different types of creatures. 

Castiel separated from the other two as he went around the house. He flashed his light around the home, wondering what could have been hunting the hunter to the point of all this. Whatever it was had mauled him hadn’t exactly touched much in his home… something more was going on. 

Castiel had an odd feeling like they were being watched and he stuck close to Dean. He’d felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up and he’d only ever felt that when on a hunt. Dean had told him to always trust a guy feeling, trust his instincts. Dean asked him what was wrong but he wrote it off, telling him it was nothing. He didn’t want to tell them something that wasn’t true and above all he was sure that if anything was truly watching them, they would be able to handle it. 

As they moved deeper into the house, they moved into what might have been a library, seeing that this room was clearly where Elkins had been found as it was the most trashed out of them all. He could hear glass crunching under their feet as he looked at books thrown to the floor, pages ripped out from whatever force had knocked them around.

He followed the light when Sam pointed the flashlight up to the skylight that was broken in. Castiel himself inspected the floor beneath. It had been broken from the outside in. What had attacked him… had come from the ceiling? It had come from above?

“It looks like there was more than one, whatever attacked him,” Sam stated. 

“Looks like he put up one hell of a fight too,” Dean added as they all moved around the room. 

Sam began to inspect the desk that was there while Dean looked down, pursing his lips as he found something. The hunter moved an old wooden box with his foot. He inspected it carefully, wondering what was important about it before he pieced it together. It was gun case. It was to hold whatever type of gun that was missing while the thirteen notches along the bottom were to hold the thirteen bullets that would have went with the gun. Well there was the robbery part.

Something caught Castiel’s eyes and he looked down to where there was blood splatter on the floor but that wasn’t all. Where there was blood, it looked like there was a message carved into the floor, though he couldn’t quite make it out with the blood. He looked around, grabbing a piece of paper and a pencil from as he got an idea.

“What’chya got, angel?” Dean asked as he looked away from the gun case to where Castiel was running a pencil over a piece of paper on the floor. 

“I don’t know. There are some scratches on the floor here,” he answered.

“Death throes, maybe?” Sam questioned as he shined his own light over, wondering what Cas had.

“Maybe,” he muttered as he picked the paper up. He didn’t much know what it was supposed to be but he thought something was better than nothing. He handed it over to Dean. “I don’t know what it is,” he said. “A message, maybe.”

Dean turned it around so that he could see the paper correctly before he made a noise. He wouldn’t have thought anything of it at first but just like the journal… it reminded him of someone. “Look familiar to you?” he asked Sam. 

Sam broke away from what he was looking at to take the paper from Dean. “Three numbers, six digits– the location and combination of a P.O. box… it’s a mail drop?” he asked Dean, though it was only for confirmation. He already knew the truth. 

Dean’s head quirked in a slight nod. “That’s just the way Dad does it,” he said, sharing a look with his brother as they wondered what the hell was going on here. 

 

When they got to the place of the post office box, Dean parked them in an alley, making sure no one was watching them. They alley that they’d gone down, a coffee shop sat right next door and on the other side a dry cleaners. The actual post office could be seen right across the street. Dean and Sam walked forward and went to leave the alley, but Castiel hung back, hesitating just a little. 

Dean looked back when he didn’t feel his boyfriend by his side and he too paused, walking back. “Angel? Hey?” he asked, looking around as if something was keeping him there. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he questioned. “Aren’t you coming in?”

Castiel licked his lips as he too looked around. “I think I’m gonna go in and watch, make sure no one’s watching you while you go in there, okay? This might be just something for you two,” he said as he looked down the alley to where a second entrance to the coffee shop resided. “Could even be a trap somehow. So you two go in and I’m going to sit in the window of the coffee shop. Make sure no one follows you or is watching you, okay?” he asked. 

Dean hesitated before he gave a little smile and he nodded, kissing his temple before he let the other go into the coffee shop. 

Castiel got in the coffee shop and watched them go in. He watched them look for the right P.O. box, looking all around to make sure no one was watching them or following them. He didn’t know what had brought on the sudden need to hang back but he just wanted to make sure the other two were safe. They’d found this place on pure luck and because of him. He hoped nothing was going to happen to them. 

He ordered a couple of things for them as he sat down at the table, thinking they might like something different than the usual burgers, pizza, and other miscellaneous junk food that they ate on the road. If not for the fact that they were always running for their lives and doing tons of cardio, he’d wonder how they stayed in shape, all of them. 

He ordered a few bagels, some scones, and a whole pie for Dean, remembering his boyfriends love for the confection. The waitress sort of looked at him when he ordered all that as he was one person at a barstool at the window but when he quickly explained that he was taking that and three coffees to go, she seemed to understand that it was not all for him.

By the time Castiel had ordered all of that and turned to look back at the building across the street, Dean and Sam were already out of the building and disappearing back into the alley.

He sighed a little. So much for watching them. He’d barely done that. Hopefully nothing was truly after them. 

Sam and Dean, however, had been floored when they opened the P.O. box, something that was familiar with the way their Dad did things, only to find a letter addressed to a J.W. Neither had said anything until they were back in the car, waiting for Castiel to come back out of the coffee shop as they took it all in. 

It was Sam that broke the silence. “J.W. – you think? John Winchester?” Sam asked. It was becoming increasingly clear that their father knew this Elkins so why wouldn’t it be for him? If they knew each other? 

Dean was thinking the same thing. Daniel Elkins was a hunter that clearly knew a thing or two. It would have been almost unheard of if they hadn’t crossed paths once or twice. Of course Dean had never met him that he knew of but that meant nothing. His father was known for keeping secrets. 

He shook his head slightly. “I don’t know… should we open it?”

As soon as Dean seemed to ask that, a knock sounded on the window next to him. They both jumped a little, though immediately they expected Castiel. When they looked to the side and saw who they did, both of them were dumbfounded.

It had been a while since they’d seen him. The last time they’d seen him had been in Chicago, a whole lot of weeks ago. Before Dean had met Cas. They’d been battling with some girl named Meg and the daeva she’d been controlling. But the daeva had come back, attacked them all. And that was when they’d decided that they couldn’t be together, not the three of them. Not when they seemed to be a weakness to each other. They’d had to let each other go.

“Dad?” they questioned in unison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter soon! I promise. I just wanted to get two up right away!


	3. Dean's Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean tells John about Cas and what Cas is to him... but how will John react?

Neither Sam nor Dean particularly knew what to do as their father smiled to them from outside the window of the impala. All they could do was question why their father was there and how he’d even found them. The two shared a fleeting look as John moved and got into the back seat of the car and they turned in their own seats to look at him. 

“Dad, what are you doing here? Are you alright?” Sam asked immediately, always being one to cut to the chase. 

Dean listened to their father tell them that yes, he was alright and that he’d just heard the news about Elkins and he’d come out to see what was going on, to check everything out completely. He listened as John explained that he came to Colorado as fast as he could muster and how he’d seen them at his place. 

When Dean heard John say that, he froze. When his Dad made eye contact, he thought that was it, he thought he was going to get it. You see, John didn’t know about Castiel, not as far as he could tell. Dean had met his boyfriend after their happenings in Chicago and he didn’t bother calling his Dad anymore. It was like calling air; there was no point. 

John had never been particularly…  _ open minded _ about same sex relationships. He’d never had to be when he was a kid. It was… well it wasn’t unheard of but it was a lot less accepted than it was now. And of course, John was a marine. In his days, you were gay and you might as well have been a woman with your own vagina between your legs. 

He remembered when John used to get drunk and tell him things like that. He remembered the chills it used to send down his spine at the torture he talked about. He’d had to sit through drunken stories about soldiers being found out as gay. John made him listen to the stories of rape and pain that they had lived through while overseas. 

When he was a kid, he was sure the stories were meant to scare him into never being that. He was sure his Dad was trying to scare him straight. To bang girls and girls only and if he ever got the urge for something else to stow it down deep. He’d been convinced that it was a scare tactic. Part of him was still sure about that. But he didn’t know if it was because John didn’t want his son to be gay… or if he just didn’t want his son to go through what he’d seen others go through. 

He’d always hoped that it was the latter. When he’d figured himself out as bisexual, he’d always hoped that his father had maybe always just seen it in him early and he wanted his son to be safe and protected. The last thing he wanted was for his father to hate him.

Dean barely realized his father was still talking until John was saying that he’d waited outside the house and not come in because he had to make sure they weren’t being followed and he was nodding at Dean that they covered their tracks well. 

“We learned from the best,” Dean offered with a fleeting smile. 

“Wait, so you came all the way out here for this Elkins guy?” Sam asked. 

As soon as that left Sam’s mouth, Dean thought ‘here we go’ and nearly rolled his eyes. He wondered if it was already starting. The whole back and forth between his brother and his father that had been going on for years. Since Sam was old enough to think for himself and not follow blindly behind John Winchester. 

“Yeah,” John said, not giving Sam a reaction. “He was– was a good man. Taught me a hell of a lot about hunting.”

Sam swallowed, looking at Dean before looking back at his father. “You never mentioned him to us.”

John sighed more at himself than it was at Sam’s line of conversation. “We had a falling out. I hadn’t seen him in years… when I heard that he died… I dropped what I was doing, came up here,” he clarified as he shifted just a little before he gestured to the letter. “I should look at that,” he said. 

Dean looked down before he passed it over to his father.

John opened the letter and took out the paper, beginning to read it out loud. “If you’re reading this, I’m already dead…” he reiterated, pausing only for a moment before he shook his head as he kept reading. “That son of a bitch. He had it the whole time.”

“Dad, what?” Sam asked. 

“When you searched the place did you see an old gun? It would have been an antique, a colt revolver. Did you see anything like that?” he asked as he looked back and forth between his sons. 

Dean’s eyebrows lifted. “Yeah– well no,” he said. “There was an old case but it was empty.”

John cursed as he moved to get out of the car. “Shit. They have it.”

“What, Dad? Whatever killed Elkins?” Dean asked. 

“Yeah, we gotta pick up their trail,” John dictated as he got out of the car. 

Sam leaned over Dean a little to look out the window at his father. “Wait, you want us to come with you?” Sam asked as his father said ‘we’. The last time they were together they were separating not an hour later. Now their father wanted them working together?

“Yeah. If Elkins was telling the truth, we have to get that gun before they figure out what it is.”

Sam looked as confused as Dean felt. “The gun? Why–”

“Because I said so, that's why. It's important.”

“Dad, we don't even know what these things are yet.”

John paused a beat before he sighed. “If it's what killed him then it's what Danny Elkins hunted best… vampires.”

Dean and Sam were floored for the second time that day. Vampires? John had to be joking. “I thought there was no such thing?” Dean asked. 

“Yeah, you never even mentioned them, Dad,” Sam said. 

John sighed again. “I thought they were extinct. I thought Elkins and other hunters had wiped them out. I was wrong,” he said after a long pause. He saw the curiosity on their faces and he sucked in a breath. “Most lore is crap. A cross won't repel them, sunlight won't kill them, and neither will a stake to the heart. The bloodlust– that's real. They need fresh human blood. They were once people so you don't even know it's a vampire until it's too late…”

“What do you want us to do, Dad?” Dean asked. 

“I'll follow you to your motel,” John said before the man disappeared, probably going back to his own car to follow them. 

Dean was barely even thinking as the silence stretched between them until the back door opened once again and Castiel plopped down into the seat. After the whole vampire surprise thing, Dean had nearly forgotten about his boyfriend. He'd forgotten to tell his father at least. Oh this wasn't going to be good. 

“Alright. I am sorry it took so long but I wanted to surprise you with pie and Sam I know you hate junk food and sweets but I know you just have a weakness for raspberry twists–” he stopped short as he saw the other two just sitting there looking at him. He had this odd feeling from the way they stared. “What did I miss?”

 

Castiel breathed as they drove to the motel, Sam explaining to him what had happened while he was in the coffee shop. “So your Dad is back,” he said in a flat tone. “How exciting for you.”

Castiel didn't mean to sound like such an ass. He'd heard many stories about John Winchester. Some were good and others not so much. He didn't much have an opinion on the guy yet except for the very present fact that Dean had flat out told him that there was a very good chance he wasn't going to like him. And then Sam had told him the same about their father. It wasn't like Castiel was exactly dying to meet John. He'd hoped it wouldn't come for a long time. 

He wondered how the older man would react to him not only hunting and traveling with his sons but that he was dating one of them, bedding him on a regular basis. Of course they wouldn't mention that part but he was sure the elder would be able to put it together as soon as he heard the news. 

Castiel sighed as he curled up a little in the backseat. “What are we going to do?” He asked. 

Dean had been sitting there the whole time, just staring straight ahead while his knuckles turned white from gripping the steering wheel so hard. He'd barely listened when Sam explained to Cas why their father was there. He'd been too busy thinking about himself and what he was going to do when John ultimately found out that he’d not only brought a civilian into a world of monsters and gore… but he was dating him. 

His head swam with every variation, every outcome with what could happen. Maybe his father would be okay with it. Maybe his father would strike him for being disgraceful… though it wouldn’t have been the first time. Maybe he’d take Sam and tell Dean not to come near them again. Maybe John would love Cas just like Sam did; like part of the family. Maybe that was too much to hope for. 

He was so lost in his own head that he realized he’d passed the turnoff to the motel a while ago and he swung the car, not even hearing his boyfriend behind him saying his name. 

It was Sam’s voice that broke him out of his trance as he gently spoke his name. His eyes flicked up to his brother, seeing the way Sam was looking at him. “What?” he muttered. 

“It’s going to be okay,” he said softly. “Whatever Dad says about any of this– if he does say anything negative, then he’s an idiot for not seeing that you and Cas belong together. I could see it the first night. He’ll come around. It just might take him a minute,” he said.

Dean shook his head, though no words came out of his mouth. He didn’t know how to approach this. He didn’t know how to  _ deal _ with this sort of thing. He’d barely known how to deal with relationships and now he had to deal with all this. He had to handle the possibility of his father disowning him and never wanting to see him again. He had to digest that, find a way around it if it came down to it. 

What shook him, though… was when he caught the reflection of Cas in the rearview mirror and immediately he knew what was going on in his boyfriend’s head. He relaxed as he reached back and took his hand into his. “As long as you don’t want to, you’re not going anywhere, angel,” he whispered softly. “You’re mine and I’m yours, remember?” he asked. 

Castiel smiled softly when Dean said that because Dean wasn’t the only one who had been having a mini panic attack. In such a short time, Dean and Sam had become everything to him. He did miss his family, mostly a few of his siblings but he did still miss them. He gave up everything to be there in that impala with Dean, to be helping people. When Dean had told him that his father was back… it had shaken him to his core. 

He’d wondered if Dean would make him leave at his father’s request. At that point where would he go? Would he go home?  _ Could _ he go home? Would he be able to face his family after he’d just left and took money and products from their store? Would they want him back?

He couldn’t believe the relief that settled in him as soon as Dean said that he wasn’t going anywhere unless he wanted to. 

Castiel squeezed his hand back tightly, leaning down to kiss his hand. “I–” he began, though he cut himself off at what he was about to say to the other. His cheeks turned red but he smiled to himself. “That means a lot to hear you say, Dean,” he whispered. He would tell Dean later when it was just the two of them. 

Dean smiled as he pulled into the motel, Dean and Cas having arrived in Boulder before Sam. It had given them enough time to get a room. He looked behind them to see if John was there yet and when he saw nothing, he got out, grabbing their gear as he popped the trunk. 

“It’s going to be okay, angel,” Dean said as he wrapped an arm around his shoulders, bringing him in and kissing his temple. 

Castiel smiled, leading the way to the door of the motel room as he was keeping their room key on hand. “I hope you’re right,” he whispered. 

When John arrived, Castiel was in the bathroom. He would have been lying if he said he wasn’t hiding from the older hunter. He supposed it was nerve racking enough to be meeting the father of the guy you were dating but to do it when you knew he might not even like you? It was disconcerting for Cas and it didn’t much sit right with him. 

He kept telling himself that this would go fine. John would be shocked at first like his parents were and then he would be fine. He had to be because Dean was his kid and he didn’t know how Dean would react to losing his father. He couldn’t… John couldn’t be so horrible…

When he heard the knock on the door, he closed his eyes and waited for Dean to call him out. 

Dean looked to Sam, who only nodded, when their father knocked. 

Sam opened the door and John stepped in, immediately going to set up a police scanner. “Vampires are never dormant for very long. They may have got Elkins but if they’re still in town, which they probably are, they won’t be able to resist a hunt, a feeding. We’ll be ready,” he said before he looked around. 

Dean watched as John took in the extra bags and he thought that was it right there. John would know and he would have to explain it before he even got a chance to tell him the truth but his father only offered a lifted eyebrow. 

“What you two forget how to travel light in my absence?” he asked, almost jokingly. Or as joking as their father ever really got. 

Dean didn’t answer, nor did Sam. Neither knew what to say… especially when this was Dean’s time. He needed to tell their father the truth. 

Sam would have liked to say he knew what was going to happen but they’d never had to deal with something like this. They’d never thought about telling their father about Dean’s bisexuality because Dean assured him that it would never be an issue. It would never be worth telling John. But now the whole world was flipping on it’s head as both of them realized that that simply wasn’t the truth here. 

Dean stood a little straighter. “Dad, we have something we need to talk about,” he said in a far more demanding tone than he’d ever taken with his father before. Yes, sir; no,sir… that was the extent of the tone he had with his father. He showed respect because it was all but beaten into him at childhood. And sometimes when he got really mouthy there was a little bit of a beating.

John looked over before he shook his head, setting up the police scanner. “Whatever it is, it can wait Dean. Now isn’t the time. We need to be listening for the vam–”

“No, Dad,” he said with more conviction.

John’s head whipped up and suddenly, Dean felt the fear that his father had always been able to instill in him. His eyes cast down to John’s hand, wondering if he was mad enough to make a fist yet. “Excuse me?” he asked, as if  _ telling _ Dean to check the way he was talking to him. 

Dean cleared his throat as he rolled his shoulders, trying to relax. He saw Sam watching him from behind John and he nodded, telling Dean that he could do it and he was right there for his brother. Dean sucked in a breath. “This can’t wait. We need to have this conversation now.”

John’s jaw clenched. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were the one calling the shots now,” he said, though his voice was anything but understanding while he talked. 

Dean’s jaw all but quivered as he opened his mouth and he snapped it shut again to save himself from looking like an idiot. He’d faced wendigos, witches, werewolves, shtriga, ghosts, and  _ countless _ other things. But nothing had him more afraid than his father did. He swallowed hard as he blinked for a long while to get his wits about him as he tried again. 

“Th-there’s just… there’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. For a while now, you know but then… you’re always gone and it wasn’t really an issue until after we saw you in Chicago–”

“Spit it out, boy!” John snapped. 

Dean winced, starting a little at his father’s tone of voice. “I’m gay,” he blurted. At that point he was standing there, wide-eyed as he looked at his father. He watched the lack of reaction from John and he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to handle it and so he tried once more. “W-well I’m n-not… I’m not gay,” he stammered as he shook his head. “Not… not completely anyway– I like both… boys a-a-and girls. I… I like boys and girls…” he said definitively. 

A long drawn out silence rocked through the whole room. Between Sam holding his breath waiting for his father’s reaction to Dean doing the same. The entire room seemed much too quiet to put anyone at ease. 

Dean simply stood there. He didn’t know what else he was supposed to do in this situation. With the way John was looking at him, he wasn’t sure if he was going to come after him or simply blow it off but either way… John didn’t particularly seem  _ okay _ with what he was saying. 

Sam didn't dare say a word either. He knew better. While he loved his brother, even loved Cas, this was not his fight until it had to be. He wouldn't let his father go after Dean but he couldn't meddle just yet. 

John finally moved, looking down as if processing. It was a long moment before he picked his head back up, the smile on his face had made Dean nearly relax… until he started laughing. 

Dean's whole body tensed anew when John began to laugh. He didn’t know what to say or do… he didn’t know why his father was laughing but it was unsettling at the least. He looked to Sam and he seemed to be at just as much of a loss as Dean was. His father wasn’t exactly the most  _ jovial _ person in the world. So anything past a small smirk… it was unusual. Especially given the circumstances. 

John laughed more, finally calming. “That… that was good, Dean. This a joke because you want your own motel room or something? Think we’ll be scared or something?”

Dean frowned at his father’s reasoning. So it was going to be like this. “What? Dad, no–”

“Because I mean if you want to get your own room and be late to the action, go ahead,” he laughed again, giving a wave as if he was blowing off whatever Dean said. 

The hunter huffed. “Would you just listen to me for a second–”

“No,” John said. “Dean, we don’t have time for this. We don’t have time for your jokes and you messing around. We’ve got a hunt.”

Dean’s jaw clenched. “Dad, I’m not joking–”

“Now see that’s a lie, Dean,” John said as he looked over at his son. His whole demeanor was much more serious than it had been previously and Dean almost took a step back at the way the look seared into him. “I know it’s a lie. Because I didn’t raise a faggot for a son. Or even half of one.”

Dean winced at the word and he nearly felt tears in his eyes, the wind feeling like it had been knocked from him. All the times he’d thought his father's stories were just tales to get him to be safe… all the times he thought John cared more about him, as his son, than anything else… it sort of came crashing down in his mind. 

He tried not to let the word creep into his veins and poison him. He tried not to care what his father thought. But he knew… that was one of the only things he cared about. He cared what Sam thought and he cared what John thought. Those were the two most important people in his life sans Cas. 

Cas… oh god, what would his father do when he realized he didn’t just like boys but that one was constantly with them? What would he do when he found out that the man he was seeing was here, in the bathroom, waiting to come out? What would John do… when he saw Castiel? What would happen?

Castiel had heard everything. The walls of motels were usually thin but this one seemed to be made of paper. He’d heard John enter the room and he’d heard the way Dean had stammered to tell his father about his sexuality. He’d closed his eyes when he heard that. He’d wanted nothing more than to run to his boyfriend; hold his hand and make him feel better. He wanted to be there for Dean but he had advised him to stay in the bathroom until he called him out. He didn’t want to surprise John right out the bat, he wanted to ease him into it. 

When Cas heard the laughter, he thought for a moment that something had been said that he hadn’t heard. He moved closer to the door to listen closer and better… but what he heard was not what he’d expected. John thought Dean wanted another room? He thought he was making some sort of joke? He listened as Dean went back and forth with John for just a moment, trying to explain to his father that this wasn’t a joke. 

And then that word came out.  _ Faggot _ . Oh how he loathed that word,  _ despised _ it. He’d heard it plenty of times in high school when he was growing up and then again in college. He knew it well. He knew it so well he could practically spot where and who it was coming from when someone simply uttered the first consonant sound. 

He too had winced at the word when it came to his ears, but his thought process wasn’t on himself for too long as he thought about Dean. How was Dean reacting? How was Dean handling this? This was the first time he’d ever had to face his sexuality beyond thinking about it and dating him. Sam was too accepting to give Dean any backlash and they never payed attention to people they were never going to see again. His father was different. 

Castiel heard a long expanse of silence and he closed his eyes for a minute as he imagined what Dean was going through, what he was doing, and if he would say anything else. He simply heard the sudden beeps and noises of the police scanner and he swallowed as he knew that Dean wouldn’t be calling him any time soon. 

He stepped back from the door and made a decision. He fixed his clothes and his hair before he simply opened the door to the bathroom and walked out. 

The suddenness of it had John drawing his gun and pointing it at the boy. “Who the hell are you?” he growled as he moved to go after him. 

“Dad, stop!” Dean yelled as he stepped in front of Cas and wrapped his arm around him so that he was pressed against his back. “Do.  _ Not _ . Hurt. Him,” he demanded. He could feel Castiel behind him and, really, that was the most comfort he’d had since this had begun.

Dean Winchester may have feared his father, and for good reason. He may have been scared of what the other might do or say… but Castiel was something to him he didn’t understand yet and he’d be  _ damned _ if he was going to let his father hurt him or scare him out of his life; the only happiness he had. 

John’s jaw clenched but only because there he was with his sons and then a third person just came out, not offering any kind of explanation as to how he got there. He thought it was someone who’d followed them; a vampire maybe. Or even something else. Maybe it was someone they saved. But this was a family matter. They should be on their way.

“Who is he?” John asked with more anger in his voice this time around.

Dean’s own jaw clenched as he squared his shoulders. He readied for a fight or an argument… he readied to go fisticuffs with his own father because… when it came to Cas, he could do anything and face anyone. “Dad, this is Cas,” he said. “He’s my boyfriend.”

“You’re not gay,” John asserted as if the words alone would reign them true and Dean would just say ‘you’re right’ and then make Cas leave. 

“You’re right. I’m not. I’m bisexual… but this is my boyfriend–”

John grabbed him by his shirt, fist tight as he brought Dean in. “You must be going awful far for a joke, boy. Because I didn’t raise a faggot and no son of mine would be so dumb as to take a civ on the road with him.”

“Cas  _ wanted _ to come. I couldn’t have talked him out of it if I tried. And I didn’t. Why? Because I care about him more than I’ve ever cared about anyone except for you and Sam,” he explained. There was still respect in Dean’s voice as he spoke to his father even though John had shown him nothing like that in return.

Castiel listened to Dean’s voice, hearing so much more conviction in his voice than there was the first time he talked to his Dad. He didn’t want to be conceded, think that he was the reason. But on the other hand, he knew. He knew that he was giving Dean some kind of strength.

John licked his lips as he looked between Dean and Cas. He seemed to be calculating what was going on, what was happening with all this. “This is a joke,” John said once more.

Dean’s face turned into one of absolute defiance, having had enough at that point. “You can say it as many times as you want to,” he said as he pried John’s hand off his shirt. “You can say it until you’re blue in the face, I don’t really give a damn,” he started. 

“Excuse me–” John began as Dean gave him an attitude that he simply wasn’t keen on.

“Yeah, that’s what you should be saying to Cas because you’re being a dick,” he said. “This is not some kind of elaborate joke. And you know it. You just don’t want to admit it. I am bisexual, Dad… and Cas is my boyfriend.”

“The hell he is. He goes. Now,” John growled as he pointed, though when he did, he gestured with his gun. 

Castiel shrunk back a little and behind Dean, scared. It wasn’t that he thought John was truly going to shoot him but he didn’t want John waving the gun around either. He was still wary about them. 

Dean felt Castiel get nervous and he turned. “Hey, hey, angel,” he said. “It’s okay,” he whispered as he cupped his cheek before he looked at his father. “He’s not going to hurt you,” he muttered before he looked back to Cas. 

“Yeah, I think that’s enough. Dad, let’s take a walk,” Sam said, opening the door and nudging his father through the threshold. 

John didn’t want to leave. He didn’t want to be told what to do by his youngest son who he still wasn’t square with for walking out on them and going to Stanford. But he needed air. He needed to get away from them. He needed to get away from it all. 

He stepped outside, feeling Sam follow. “This is… it’s… disgusting, it’s revolting, it’s–”

“Love, Dad. It’s what love looks like. Maybe you’ve forgotten what love is after all the time you’ve been without Mom but in there– they  _ love _ each other, Dad. They love each other and you’re too blinded by your own hatred to see that,” he said before he shook his head. “I’ve never seen Dean so happy and I spent nearly every day with him growing up. I’ve never seen him take interest in a girl beyond a night. I’ve never seen him look at  _ anyone _ the way he looks at that boy in there,” he said. “Cas is the love of his life–”

“Don’t talk about it like that,” John said, making a face as he turned away from Sam a little, though he didn’t go far. “Don’t talk about it like it’s normal. It’s a perversion. It needs to end,” he muttered in a gruff tone as he made for the door and Sam stopped him. 

“I swear to god, Dad, if you go back into that room without somewhat of an open mind, we’re  _ leaving _ . Now you needed us for some reason. Whatever this gun is, whatever backup you needed, you wanted  _ us _ . Well you got another hunter. He’s part of our family. And he’s not going anywhere,” he said. 

Sam stood there for a long time, watching his father debate what to do, watching him battle internally about what was more important to him and he had to think for a moment that it made him angry that his father even had to think about accepting his son for who he was. 

“Dean is happy, Dad,” he said softly. “And I’m not going to let you take that away. You shouldn’t want to. So take a few minutes, take a walk, and we’ll call you if anything comes up that’s important. But take a little or don’t come back,” Sam mumbled as he shook his head, going back into the room. He briefly thought about whether or not his father would come back, whether or not he would forgive him for the side he took. But as he walked in, seeing Dean sat on the bed with Cas in his arms, he knew he had the family he wanted. 

Sam gave them a small smile. He couldn’t help but feel bad for them a little bit. How could his father, with the way the world was now, not be able to see that these two were in love?. “I told him to take a walk. He’s either not gonna be back or he’ll be back in a little while. Why don’t you two get some sleep?” he suggested. “You two sleep and I’ll listen to the scanner. 

Dean clenched his jaw at the thought of his father not coming back. He didn’t know what to think. He didn’t know whether to be hurt or relieved… and at which? What if his father didn’t come back? What if he did? What was the better out come here? He remembered a time where it wouldn’t have been an option. His father coming back every time would have been better. Always. But now… he wasn’t so sure. 

Castiel put a hand on his chest, getting his attention. “Baby… I’m here. I’m here with you and I’m not going anywhere. Your father may be scary but I’ve faced monsters with you–  _ for _ you. Nothing short of death is going to keep me from you.”

Dean couldn’t help the dopey smile on his face as he felt his heart beat at Cas’ confession. He brought him in for a deep kiss; a loving kiss. 

Castiel smiled into it, looking into his eyes. “Three of us against the world, right?” he asked as he looked to Sam as well as, who smiled and nodded. 

“We should… try and get some sleep,” Dean said softly, though he knew that he may not sleep at all, not when his father was out there probably hating him at that very moment. 

 

Somehow Dean managed to fall asleep. It wasn’t peaceful or enough to escape the horrors he was facing in the real world with his father. But it was rest all the same. Rest that his body needed so much. Even if it was plagued by nightmares of the father he wanted acceptance from so much. 

Castiel… he was not so lucky. He’d closed his eyes and tried his damndest to get some sleep but nothing came. He tried and tried, forcing himself to count backwards and then to imagine something happy, thinking it would help… but he could not shut his brain down. Every time he tried, all he saw was John looking at both of them with a face of disgust. All he remembered was John calling his own son  _ that word _ .

He knew that there was no sleep in his future any time soon so he elected to stay awake and listen to the scanner along with Sam. He was sure that Sam didn’t know he was awake but it didn’t much matter. This way if Sam had somehow fell asleep, then information would be heard either way. 

He didn’t know when but at some point, there was a noise outside and Sam got up to go look, stopping when he saw his father. He opened the door to look John in the eye as if giving him the opportunity to set everything straight, to come in and do it with an open mind or not to come in at all.

John watched Sam for a moment. He didn’t say anything as he stepped past his son and into the room. He stopped only for a moment when he got in, seeing Dean and Castiel curled up with one another in the same bed but… once again he said nothing. He pulled the chair from the table out and sat at it so that it was facing the beds, sitting down. 

“Get some sleep,” was all he said to Sam. 

Sam could tell that his father was conflicted to say the least. He didn’t know how to handle something he didn’t accept but he didn’t want to lose his sons, that much he could tell. He wanted to ask, wanted to talk to John about what was going through his head and what was going to happen when the other two woke but he didn’t. 

He nodded at his father and went over to the bed, kicking off his shoes and laying over the bedding so that he could be ready to get up when it was time to. 

Castiel laid awake as he heard John’s breathing coupled with the police scanner. He wanted to get up, to say something and to talk to the man… but he had a feeling that without Dean there, he wasn’t going to get what he wanted. In fact, he was sure he would make it worse. 

He tangled with it, though. He debated on saying something or saying nothing. But ultimately, when Dean pulled him closer and nuzzled deeper into him… he let go of everything else and just closed his eyes, sleep finally finding him. 


	4. John's Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter the boys deal with the fact that maybe John might not be one hundred percent okay with Dean and Cas but it's not just John that's making things worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys. I'm really sorry that it's taken me so long to get this chapter up. Life has been crazy lately. I hope you enjoy.

The darkness had yet to leave when the early hours of the morning rolled around. While the other three slept, John had stayed up the whole time simply listening to the scanner and watching his sons. He’d had a lot to think about as he’d watched Sam and Dean sleep; one son that went away and left their family… and another that had shocked him enough that it had shaken him to the core.

The entire night, he’d had a lot to think about. But instead… he’d watched as Dean held close to Castiel throughout all the hours he’d sat there. He’d watched when Dean got up and went to the bathroom in the middle of the night. The boys seemed to forget he was even there when Dean walked back and wrapped around Castiel, the other boy nuzzling closer and asking him if he was okay before Dean kissed him and told him to go back to sleep. 

John had simply been sitting there, simply  _ watching _ as everything ran through his head over and over again. He thought about bringing his boys in on what this gun really did and with the bullets… it was a stick of dynamite to the demon that really killed Mary… and then Jess. 

That had been when the call came through. 

“ **Unit 22, let me confirm. Mile marker 41, abandoned car– I need a work up** ,” came the first voice over the scanner.

 

“ **Copy that. Possible 207, we need to get forensics out here** ,” the second answered. 

At that, John hopped up, knowing that was the call he’d been waiting for all night. He moved, hitting the edges of the bed to rouse them. “Sam, Dean,” he said, though he forewent Castiel’s name even as they all moved. “Let’s go,” he demanded as he grabbed his jacket and put it on. 

When Dean heard his father’s voice, he’d thought it a dream. He had fallen asleep pretty soon after the entire fight. He didn’t know if it was because he needed it or because telling his father had him so stressed out that letting it all go was the sleeping pill he didn’t know he needed. It was one of the longest and best sleeps he’d had on the road in a while. 

Part of him wondered what this meant for them as a family. Was Dean supposed to forget the things John had said to him and his boyfriend the night previous? Was he supposed to just… say okay and move on? Would John apologize to them? Was he suddenly okay with Castiel? There were so many questions and probably more if he sat there and thought about it for a little while. 

But now, there was his father waking them up… and he didn’t even know why? Of course it didn’t help that he was dazed with sleep and unless they were on a hunt, he was used to his morning ritual of giving Castiel kisses to his skin until he inevitably woke up or threw a pillow at him– because Cas was so  _ not _ a morning person. Without that ritual, it left him whirring a little as he tried to figure out what was going on.

He made a noise as he sat up, one hand going to rub the sleep out of his face and the other finding Cas’.

“Picked up a police call,” he said as explanation before the other two even got a chance to ask as he knew that they would. 

Castiel sat up with them, only half awake, though the sheer lack of his name and the way John did everything but look at him… it made him wonder if he was even invited to the hunt. He speculated whether he would be allowed to go or if he would be cast aside. He wouldn’t have put it past John. He didn’t know the man very well but he did know that he hadn’t been happy with his existence the night before so it would not have surprised him if the elder hunter decided to forgo his presence and simply entertain the idea that just the three of them were there; no Castiel.

“What happened?” Sam questioned in a groggy tone as he too woke up. 

John fixed his jacket and looked to Sam, seemingly glad to have the distraction as not to look at the way Dean got up and immediately checked on Cas, listening to their conversation as he made sure his boyfriend was okay and kissed his temple when Castiel told him he was just fine and not to worry about him so much.

It almost tripped John up. He would have liked to think that in some aspects he knew his sons very well. Dean had… he’d never been so…  _ soft _ with anyone, not even his brother. It almost– no… it  _ did _ remind him of the way he’d been with Mary.

“Uh,” John began, shaking himself out of his reverie, his whole body uncomfortable and on edge. He wanted out of the room, his whole body itching to get out as three sets of eyes landed on him, one pair in particular making his skin crawl. “Couple called 911 that they found a body in the street. Cops got there and everyone was missing. It’s the vampires,” he said as he turned towards the door. 

Sam immediately groaned as he reached for his own jacket. “How do you know?”

John got a little huffy at the way his son questioned him and he turned around for just a moment. “Just follow me, okay?” 

As he turned back to the door, hand on the knob, Castiel spoke. 

“Does that include me?” he asked as he stood. He saw Dean about to turn and either tell him that of course it did or that maybe he shouldn’t cause problems with his father. But Castiel gave him a look, telling him to stay quiet. It was a question he wanted John Winchester to answer. 

John’s jaw clenched as he thought it over. He didn’t much like the boy but he knew that vampires had nests. He knew that the more people they had when finding it, the less someone might get hurt. Namely, his sons. If the boy… Castiel, got hurt… well then that was on him. The job came with a disclaimer. It was his own fault for accepting anyway. 

John didn’t look up as he drew his conclusion, just simply opening the door. “Try to keep up,” he said short and brief. 

When they got to the scene, John had told the three to hang back and let him handle it. He knew the vampires better than Dean and Sam and he didn’t want them mucking up what he was sure the police had already. 

Castiel was leaning against the car on the left side, next to Sam, as they watched John talk to a cop while Dean stood closest to it all– with his back turned– trying to catch just a peep of conversation as he tried not to let anyone know that. Castiel and Dean kept their distance in public, usually, but this was specifically for John’s benefit or they would have been enjoying each other's warmth; standing next to each other in the cold mountain hair. 

Dean had just looked over, trying to pay attention when his father began to talk back. 

Sam was in the middle of shaking his head a little. “I don’t see why we couldn’t have gone over with him,” he muttered, a little upset. They’d been doing these jobs without their father for months, John even sending them to some, and yet they were being treated like they weren’t good enough to bring along. 

When Dean heard that, his head snapped to his brother, catching a glimpse of what he’d seen the day before between his brother and father; the constant push and pull of their relationship as John asked his sons to follow his lead and Sam  _ always _ questioned where his lead was taking them. 

“Oh don’t tell me it’s already starting,” he muttered in an exasperated tone. They’d been with their father for less than twenty four hours after looking for him, missing him for months. Sure, he was still confused as to what had happened the night before and now his father simply working with them… but he thought perhaps it was a gift horse. 

“What’s starting?” Sam and Castiel asked at the same time as Cas had yet to see the way Sam always bumped heads with his father and Sam… well he was just pretending he didn’t know  _ exactly _ what Dean was referring to.

Dean gave Castiel an ‘I’ll tell you later’ look before he turned to meet his father as he walked over. “What’dya got?” he asked. 

“It was them alright. It looks like they’re heading west,” he sighed. “We’re gonna have to double back to get around that detour,” he noted. 

Castiel was about to listen, about to move to get in the car when Sam’s voice stopped him. 

“How can you be so sure?” Sam asked, skeptical. 

Dean sighed. “Sam–”

“I just wanna make sure we’re going in the right direction,” he cut Dean off. 

Dean made eye contact with Castiel once again as if telling his boyfriend that this was not going to stop any time soon once it started. But Castiel just watched. He wondered if had anything to do with the way John had treated him and Dean the night before… or if this was something more, something he hadn’t seen before. 

“We are,” John said as he watched his son, wondering if this was the start of a whole new fight when it seemed like they were just beginning to stow the other one. He just wanted a little trust, a little  _ cooperation _ from his sons. Was that so much to ask for?

“How do you know?” Sam asked. 

John sighed once again before he pulled something out of his pocket, handing it to Dean. Castiel looked over, peering at what was now in Dean’s hand and he frowned as Dean held it between his teeth. His head tilted and he shook his head. “No… is that… is that a fang?” he asked, looking over at John. Castiel didn’t miss the way John wouldn’t look at him, though he answered his question; his eyes everywhere but him.

“Not fangs– teeth. A second set descends when they attack,” he explained before his eyes tracked over, though he completely ignored Cas as he looked to the son that had been giving him attitude. “Any more questions?” When Sam stayed quiet, he took that as his answer. “Now let’s get out of here, we’re losing daylight.” He walked around the car, eyes not even moving where Castiel stood as he passed him.

Castiel sighed. He hoped this wouldn’t be how it always was. If John was going to accept him he was going to have to do it wholeheartedly. No half-assing. 

“And, Dean, why don’t you touch up your car before you get rust?” he muttered with a hint of an attitude. “I wouldn’t have given you the damn thing if I thought you were going to ruin it,” he clarified as he went towards his truck. 

Castiel’s jaw clenched before he turned to see Sam laughing at Dean a little but at the way Dean swallowed, tried to make it look like a joke, he could tell that the comment had struck some kind of chord no matter how small. He didn’t like the way John Winchester carried himself, the way he walked with such bravado and ignorance. But it was not his father… therefore not his place to say. He simply got in the car and squeezed Dean’s shoulder. 

As they drove, Castiel read out of Elkins’ journal to the boys, informing them about some of the things John might have known but none of them did. “Vampires nest in groups of 8 to 10… smaller packs are sent out to hunt for food…” he skimmed, trying to find anything particularly useful. “Um… Oh– victims are taken to the nest, where the pack keeps them alive, bleeding them for days or weeks,” he read aloud, shaking his head. 

“I wonder if that’s what happened to the 911 couple,” Dean pondered. 

When Dean and Sam had informed Castiel of their father crying vampires the night before on the way to the motel, he’d not been completely surprised to learn of their existence. They were monsters after all. What did surprise him was how people thought they were wiped out… and yet they were doing things like this. How had no hunters picked up on things like this? How had nobody thought to look for exsanguinated bodies or something of the sort? How had these monsters gotten away with this for so long?

“That’s probably what Dad’s thinking,” Sam muttered as he kept his eyes trained on the road, following their father’s truck. His hand clenched a little on the steering wheel as he thought it over. “Of course, it would be nice if he just  _ told us _ what he thinks.”

Dean got a look on his face and he looked back to Cas who gave him a questioning look in return. But, instead, he listened. He listened to whatever was coming next. 

“So it is starting?” Dean asked. 

“What?” Sam retorted defensively. 

Dean’s eyes rolled a little. “Sam, we’ve been looking for Dad all year. Now we’re not with him for more than a couple hours and there’s static already?”

“No. No,” Sam answered immediately, giving Castiel the impression that Sam might not have been telling the whole truth. “Look, I’m happy he’s okay, all right, and I’m happy that we’re all working together. That we’re  _ all _ together,” he said as he looked in the mirror at Cas. “I really am.”

Dean nodded. “Good,” he said. He loved his brother, he truly did but last night was still fresh for Cas and Dean. He knew that Sam had his own battles with their old man but the last thing he needed was for him to add salt to the wound and make things worse for them. His father might have been in the process of accepting Cas. They didn’t need Sam to rock the boat.

Sam gave a nod, watching in the rearview for a second while Cas went back to the book, to Elkins’ journal for only a moment before he sighed. “It’s just the way he treats us like we’re children,” he said and Dean made a scoffing noise as Castiel looked back up, listening intently. “He barks orders at us, Dean. He expects us to follow him without question. He keeps us on some  _ crap _ need-to-know deal. Do I need to mention that he’s not even  _ looked _ in Cas’ direction since we started. He answered Cas’ question back there because it was the next one out of our mouths as well. That’s all.”

“He does what he does for a reason, Sam–”

“What reason?”

“Our job!” Dean answered. 

“Dean, maybe your brother just has a point and is trying to voice how he feels–”

“Not now, Cas– family matter!” Dean snapped a little, enough to make Castiel’s jaw clench and look away from the brothers. Dean looked back to Sam. “He does what he does because it’s our job, Sam. There’s no time to argue. There’s no margin for error, alright, it’s just the way the old man runs things.”

“Yeah, well, maybe that worked when we were kids, but not anymore. And why are you defending him? After everything? What he stood there and called you and Cas last night and you’re okay just like he never said anything? Like he didn’t tell you Cas had to go and I’m the one who had to walk him outside and tell him not to come back unless wit was with an open mind? All the things you and I have been through– the three of us have been thorough and you’re telling me you’re all good with just falling back into line and letting him run the whole show?” he asked, sort of appalled at the way Dean was acting, at the way he’d talked to Cas. 

Dean was quiet for a few beats, thinking about it. Besides the way he’d just talked to Castiel… he only wanted them to be happy. He wanted them to continue on the road, be happy with each other, and for his father to know Castiel. To get to know the man he knew as someone that was so special to him. He’d been so different towards them both last night and now… no John wasn’t talking to him but he hadn’t said anything negative either which was in and of itself a miracle. He had to do what he had to, to keep his family together… if that meant swallowing his pride and being nice to his father after the things he’d said to him… he’d do it. He didn’t want to lose anyone in this situation.

He knew Sam was referring to something else, talking about the fact that they’d been fine without John all these months and now he was acting like they needed him and couldn’t do the job without him. But it simply wasn’t the case and John knew that… but Dean’s head was some place  _ more _ . 

“If that’s what it takes…” he said. 

 

Darkness had creeped back once again as they continued to drive. It had begun to rain lightly. The three of them weren’t tired but antsy to get out of the small space the impala provided them though they supposed it could have been worse. 

None of them had said anything for quite some time, still reeling from their argument before. Sam was mad at Dean for the way he couldn’t stand beside him on something. Castiel was mad at Dean for the way he’d snapped at him and the wording he’d chosen. And of course Dean was pretty much oblivious to both the entire ride. 

Dean thought Castiel asleep in the back since he hadn’t said much so he’d left the man alone while his brother was a whole other can of worms that he didn’t feel like opening up again so silence was the preferable option.

When his phone rang, he picked it up, having a brief conversation with his father. “Yeah Dad. All right, got it,” he said before he hung up. “Pull off at the next exit,” he muttered as he looked down at the map he’d pulled out of the glove compartment, trying to find exactly where they were. Not that he much cared. It was just something to do.   
  
Sam’s hand tightened on the wheel when that was all he was told. “Why?” he asked.   
  
Dean looked up as if it were obvious. “‘Cause Dad thinks we've got the vampire's trail,” he said plainly.   
  
“How?” he asked through clenched teeth as the answer only seemed to piss him off. Why was it so hard for their father to just tell them what he knew? Why was hiding it from them and keeping them out of the loop helping? Who did it help and what sense did it truly make?”   
  
“I don't know; he didn't say,” he offered his brother with a soft sigh. He’d been about to look back at Cas, ask him if he was good and awake when the car suddenly sped up, Sam gunning the engine like he was racing to catch up to their father.    
  
Dean looked over at him like Sam was psycho. He’d been about to ask him what he was doing when Sam swerved and passed John’s truck. Dean looked back at it only briefly right before Sam seemed to make it far enough ahead that he felt comfortable enough to slam on the breaks. When he did, he turned the wheel, laying the car in the middle of the road as the tires screeched and blocked John's truck from going anywhere; forcing him to a stop.    
  
As soon as they stopped, Dean knew exactly what was going on, Sam reaching for the door handle. “Oh crap. Here we go. Sam!” he yelled, getting out of the car in pursuit of his brother. 

Castiel got out as well. He watched as John got out of his truck and stepped into the road but he hung back, leaning against the impala with his hands in his jeans pocket. He thought to talk to Sam, to get him to get back in the car when two people were missing and currently being drained by vampires… but then again, this was a family matter. It was probably best he didn’t get involved.

“What the hell was that?” John questioned in a gruff voice, his attitude as evident as Sam’s was.

“We need to talk,” Sam demanded.. 

“About what?” John asked as he and Sam met face to face, shoulders squared like they were ready for an argument. 

“About everything. Where we going, Dad? What's the big deal about this gun?”

Dean sighed. “Sammy, come on, we can Q and A after we kill all the vampires,” he said. It wasn’t like he wasn’t curious. Of course he was. But they could do this after.

“Your brother's right, we don't have time for this,” he countered. 

“Last time we saw you, you said it was too dangerous for us to be together. Now out of the blue you need our help. Now obviously something big is going down, and we wanna know what!” Sam yelled, clearly getting himself a little amped and excited. He was never one to stay quiet, something John had always joked that it had come from his mother. But when he got too old for John to be able to control it, it wasn’t so funny anymore. 

There was a slight beat, a pause. “Get back in the car,” he instructed. The anger was written on John Winchester’s face but it was the same face Sam was wearing, neither willing to back down anytime soon, that much was clear. 

Sam clenched his jaw. “No,” Sam uttered defiantly.

“I said get back in the damn car,” John ordered, a growl in his voice. 

“Yeah. And I said no–”

“Okay you made your point, tough guy. Look we're all tired, we can talk about this later,” he said just as he pulled his brother from his father. “Sammy, I mean it, come on,” he pressed. This was the last thing he wanted. Well no, the very last thing he wanted was for their to be another fight over his relationship with Cas. But he didn’t want this either. He wanted everyone to get along. Was that so much to ask for?

“This is why I left in the first place,” Sam muttered under his breath, simply having to get the last word in.

“What'd you say?” John questioned, his anger boiling under his skin at this point. 

“You heard me,” he barked as he turned to face his Dad once again. 

Dean rolled his eyes, wondering if there was a way to stop this. Clearly the two wanted to go at it, wanted to have words, wanted to fight. All Dean wanted was peace for the incredibly small family he had. He didn’t want to lost his father, he didn’t want Sam and John to be angry and he just wanted Cas included! Why was that so much?

“Yeah. You left!” he snapped as he stepped closer. “Your brother and me– we needed you. You walked away, Sam, you walked away!”

“Stop it, both of you–” Dean tried. 

“You're the one who said don't come back Dad, you closed that door not me. You were just pissed off that you couldn't control me anymore!” he yelled at his father. He felt John grab ahold of him like they were going to go toe to toe on this one. Like they were going to go a few rounds. 

“Listen, stop it, stop it. Stop it! That's enough!” Dean yelled his own words as he broke them up, finally getting in the middle of them. He couldn’t even convey the absolute anger he was feeling at all three of them right now. Sam and John for going at it the way they did and Cas for simply  _ standing _ there and watching. “That means you too,” he said to his father, just wanting this to end.

He watched as father and son glared at each other as if to say that if Dean hadn’t broken them up, they would not be backing down. It was a pissing match and Dean almost had the urge to tell them to put away the rulers before they were turning.

Dean felt the tension leave as the two went back to their own cars and got in, trying to cool themselves down but he still felt it in the air itself. He could still feel that everyone was at odds with each other. He turned, as if looking for someone to take it out on, and he saw Castiel standing there with his hands in his pockets just watching Dean like he had been the whole time. 

“Thanks for all your help,” he barked in an accusing tone. 

Castiel’s face stayed stoic, trying not to feel like Dean’s punching bag at this point. Dean’s father and brother were mad so he was getting the brunt of it because he didn’t have the last name Winchester. “Sorry,” he offered, though there was no remorse in his voice. “I just figured it was a family matter. No place for me,” he said coldly, ice in his tone before he got back in the car. 

At that, Dean realized what he’d been doing, how he’d treated Cas. He realized that not only were Sam and John pissed at each other but Cas was now pissed at him, not even mentioning that John and Castiel still didn’t speak to each other. He let out a sigh, seeing his breath as he gave a gesture; throwing his hands up and letting them fall back down. “Terrific,” he muttered, turning to get back in the car. 

  
  


“Son of a bitch,” Dean mumbled after he watched an old, beat up, car pull up to an old, beat up, barn. The man that exited looked normal enough if not stuck in the 90’s with his ripped denim jacket and edgy look. Another man opened the door and looked out, shielding his eyes a moment from the sun, before closing the door once more. “So they’re really not afraid of the sun?” he asked. 

Castiel leaned against the ground beside Dean, binoculars in hand as he tried to see into the windows to get a look at how many were in the barn but it was no use. Even with what little windows the barn had, they seemed to be boarded up to keep out as much sunlight as they could. Of course. 

“Direct sunlight hurts like a nasty sunburn,” Castiel offered, getting a look from all of them. He could feel their eyes on them as if they were all wondering how he could know that but he remained facing forward. “The only way to kill them is by beheading. They sleep during the day– doesn't mean they won't wake up.”

Sam lifted an eyebrow. “And you know that–”

“Elkins’ journal,” he said, though he still didn’t look up at the other three. “I read it cover to cover. Memorized it.”

John gave a scoff, seeming to address Castiel for the first time that day. “You memorized it?” he asked skeptically. He wondered who this boy was trying to kid but as Castiel stood, looking to him… he saw the same look in his eyes that Dean got on a hunt, the same eyes he had. The look of absolute  _ murder _ and needing something to kick, punch, or stab to get the frustration of everyday life out. For a split second he was afraid of the boy and the stony look he gave him before he shook it off. 

When John had scoffed, Castiel had had enough. He was done playing coward to this man. He was done bowing down to him and letting him act whatever way he wanted simply because he was Dean’s father. If Dean was going to let him walk all over him to keep John appeased and not making homophobic comments than Dean had his own growing up to do. But he was done playing pretend.

“Yes, John. I memorized it. It was a piece of useful information, the whole thing– more than your journal has been yet, really. So I saw an opportunity and I  _ memorized _ it. Because some of us are more than just helpless little fairies playing monsters under the bed. Some of us have better hearing than you give them credit for,” he ground out, talking about the way John had referred to him to his sons when they had been walking to the spot they were in now, John clearly thinking Castiel couldn’t hear him. “And some of us need something to kill,” he said simply, his tone the opposite of what it was normally as he walked back towards the cars. “So maybe we can pull our heads out of our asses and go in before one of them wakes up to take a piss and hears us,” he threw back.

The three of them stood there blinking, that having been the last thing any of them expected. Castiel had been with Dean and Sam for months now and Cas head never expressed ‘needing something to kill’ or had ever talked to the brothers like that. It just wasn’t how Castiel was. He was the soft, doting, type… like a mom, almost. Now it felt like… they’d broken him. 

“Might like that boy after all,” John muttered, not realizing he’d said it out loud and not realizing that Dean had caught it. No, John Winchester didn’t like the way he talked to him, someone he didn’t know. But then, it was different. Castiel didn’t grow with his boys; they knew better not to disrespect him. What he admired was that he was more than type that played homemaker to two boys who didn’t have a home and think he was gonna play with fire and not get burned. He had something in him… even if he was still unsure about the way he traveled with his sons, being with Dean. 

Dean nearly smiled, following after Castiel as they all went back to the cars. He ran ahead of his father and brother. He wanted to tell his boyfriend that no one had ever stood up to his father like that, not even him. He wanted to tell him how impressed he was and even what his father had said under his breath. “Cas that was–”

“Don’t talk to me,” Castiel said. 

Dean frowned. “Angel–”

Castiel’s eyes seemed to flash up at him and Dean could see rage behind them.. “And  _ especially _ don’t call me that. I’m stowing my crap for this hunt. To do it correctly. Don’t think that makes me happy with you, Dean,” he said before he reached into the trunk to retrieve the machete he'd been using for a while now. 

Dean swallowed, feeling his heart ache in his chest a little. All their time on the road and Castiel hadn't, not once, been this mad at him. He couldn’t help but think that he’d brought it on himself but it didn’t stop it from hurting. He clenched his jaw as not to show he was hurting when Castiel turned his back on him so instead he cleared his throat and spoke to his father. 

“So if they might wake up then our best bet probably isn't to just walk right in,” he said, trying to change the subject completely. 

“Actually, that’s the plan,” John offered as he opened up the compartment on his truck that held all of his weapons. 

“Dad, I got an extra machete if you need one,” Dean offered, simply trying to keep a conversation with the others. 

John pulled his own out of the bed of his truck where he kept his things. He pulled out a long machete, shiny and barely used but ready to be. “I think I’m okay, thanks,” he muttered. 

Dean took in the display. From what he understood, their father had left most of his things with Dean when he disappeared. He thought John was roughing it when he went off… not he was realizing that maybe that wasn’t the case with the fancy holder. “Wow…” he muttered, glancing down at his own collection that seemed dirty and dingy compared to the way John kept his. 

John stood there for a moment, hanging his head as he thought about it. As he thought about what they were about to do, what he was asking them to do, he sighed. “So, you boys really wanna know about this colt? Why I want it?” he asked. 

Sam and Dean made brief eye contact before Sam nodded. “Yes, sir.”

John took a beat, pausing as he figured out how to tell his sons. “When we met up in Chicago and when I sent you to Indiana, I lied. I said that girl, Meg… that she wanted me because I was getting close to the  _ thing _ that killed your mom,” he whispered. “Truth is I’ve known for months.” John looked down at the ground, a little ashamed. “I didn’t want to tell you because at the time I wasn’t too sure. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t jumping the gun,” he nodded as he looked out at the trees. 

Dean stood a little taller as his father talked, curious and a little angry that John had kept this from them. He’d begun to think that Sam was right on this. How could John keep something like that from them? “Tell us,” he said. 

John nodded. “Your mother… and your girlfriend… weren’t taken by just anything… the  _ demon _ that killed them… it knows I’m tracking it and it’s been trying to stop me for months. I didn’t want you boys involved. I didn’t want it to go after you,” he explained. 

“Don’t you think that’s something we should have known, Dad?” Sam asked, his jaw clenched. John knew for some time now what had killed Jess and he didn’t think that was something to tell them?

John sighed softly. “It’s not like that. I know my boys. You wouldn’t have stopped. You wouldn’t have let it go. So I made a decision.”

Sam was about to say something else, start another fight probably but Castiel cut him off. 

“So what’s so important about the gun?” he asked gently. 

“It’s mostly a story… a legend, really. I didn’t believe a word of it until I read Daniel’s letter,” he said. “Back in 1835, when Halley's comet was overhead, the same night those men died at the Alamo. They say Samuel Colt made a gun. A special gun. He made it for a hunter, a man like us only on horseback. Story goes he made thirteen bullets, and this hunter used the gun a half dozen times before he disappeared, the gun along with him. And somehow Daniel got his hands on it.” He took a slow breath as he finished. “They say the gun can kill anything.”

Dean’s eyebrows raised immediately. “Anything– like supernatural, anything?” he questioned. 

“Like the demon,” Sam said. It wasn’t hard to piece together exactly what his father was getting at. He wanted this gun because demon’s couldn’t be killed. Only exorcised and sent back to hell. There wasn’t anything else for them. But if what John was saying about this gun was true… it was a one way ticket to getting the son of a bitch that took both Mary and Jess.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Ever since I picked up it’s trail, I’ve been trying to find a way to destroy it. Feel like there’s gotta be a way. If the stories about this gun are true… we may have it.”

There was a bit of silence from all of them before Castiel nodded. “Then we get the gun,” he said, pointing to an oversized window that would lead them right inside. “Give it a try if it’s quiet,” he nodded. 

As they moved to the barn, it was John who went through the opening first as not to put the others in danger if it wasn’t safe. The three of them followed him without words, without questions; Castiel falling in line as if it had always been like this. As if he’d always been one of John’s boys. 

Dean was the last one in, closing the door as he looked around to see what the vampires had done to this barn. It was a barn like any other, really, but he could see blood in the patchy darkness. It stuck to some spots on the floor with the hay like it had dripped straight from the source. 

He didn’t know what he’d expected but when he saw the vampires hanging from the ceiling in the most literal sense without doing it from their own legs. No, instead of doing it like that like they did in the movies, they were hanging from hammocks. He didn’t know if that was supposed to be poetic comedy or if it was just coincidence. 

They moved through the barn, Castiel moving up ahead and seeing a girl tied to a post that ran down the middle of the barn. He wondered if this was the girl of the couple that had been missing in the 911 call but he didn’t much care. He cared about getting her to safety. 

Dean and Sam were off doing something else, Dean trying to open what looked like cages on the far wall, Sam looking over the money and ‘loot’ that was on the table and John had moved along a while ago. They didn’t know where he was. 

Castiel moved beside the girl, noticing she was slumped over but she appeared to be breathing so he didn’t look for a pulse point. He moved to untie her, wanting to at least save someone out of all of this. He knew that John didn’t like him but he thought that if he could do something right, the man might warm up to him. 

That had been one of the only things in his thoughts when suddenly she began to move. He shushed her quietly, telling her he was going to get her out of there when suddenly she turned on him and gave a yell that he could only describe as inhuman. He backed away immediately, giving a stumble as she yelled. 

The sound was enough to set them all on edge as everyone in the immediate vicinity seemed to wake and be up in an instant. Castiel reached for his machete, feeling Dean by his side as if he’d been there the whole time. Castiel clutched his blade as he readied for a fight even though it was three against many, too many to count at this moment. 

“Boys, run!” they heard from John who was clearly in another room. 

Castiel felt Dean take his hand and rake off with him. He was still mad at Dean at the moment but he squeezed his hand tighter and let Dean keep him to his side as they ran out of the barn and into the sunlight. 

Only when they got by the cars did they realize John wasn’t behind them and they turned, looking into the trees as they tried to calm down and not think the worst. 

“Dad?” Dean called though he got no answer and that immediately put him at unease. “Dad!” he called again. 

There was a slight pause before John was coming through the trees. There was a quick pang of relief as they turned away to get to their cars but John shook his head as he slowed. “They won’t follow. They’ll wait until tonight. Once a vampire has your scent it’s for life.”

Dean frowned, a little worried at that. There was only four of them and a whole  _ horde _ of vampires. Would they be able to handle that? “Well then what the hell do we do now?” he asked. 

“You gotta find the nearest funeral home, that’s what,” John said. 

 

  
  



	5. Castiel's Tribulations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most of Castiel's and John's anger toward each other comes to a head as they defeat the vampires and get the colt.

To say that Dean was confused when John had told them they would need to find a funeral home would be an understatement. But when his father took the time to explain to him that they were going to need a little something called dead man’s blood to slow the vampires down, he understood. When John asked the brothers who wanted to go, Dean volunteered, saying that he would. 

Admittedly, Dean wasn’t crazy about Sam staying with John, not with the way they were at odds with each other. But he also knew that Cas wouldn’t want to stay with them so when Sam headed for the truck to go with his father and Castiel stayed by his side… he knew it was his chance. 

When Sam and John got in the truck and left, Dean immediately looked to Cas who simply shot him a look that said ‘don’t talk to me’ but it wasn’t like Dean was going to let that happen. He sighed as they got in the car. 

“Angel, please. Please talk to me.”

Castiel stayed quiet, eyes in front of him as he didn’t  _ dare _ look at Dean. Maybe he was being petty with the silent treatment. Or maybe it had hurt more than Dean knew because for weeks he’d felt like he didn’t belong and Sam and Dean had been trying to prove that he did. But as soon as John showed up… it was all different. Dean was different and he was just supposed to be okay with it. 

Dean sighed once more. “Angel, I’m sorry. Really fucking sorry. What I said was wrong and I know it. I wasn’t thinking. I just… I guess at the time I was trying to prove a point to Sam and when I get like that if you’re not on my side then I don’t want to hear it–”

Castiel scoffed. “Well at least you can admit your faults,” he growled out as he finally looked over at Dean. “What you said was fleeting and quick but it still fucking hurt, Dean… You have been telling me for weeks that I am part of this family, that this  _ was _ a family. And then as soon as your Dad shows up it’s ‘family matter, Cas’,” he huffed, mimicking Dean. “It’s bullshit,” he said. 

The hunter watched Dean yell at him and get an attitude with him. He listened as Castiel gave him his very own verbal lashing, complete with swears and everything. In the end, though… he couldn’t help but smile a bit dumbly. “I love it when those blue eyes are looking at me, even when there’s anger behind them,” he muttered as he reached for Castiel cheek. 

He batted Dean’s hand away despite the way his words made him want to melt. “Making a pass at me is not going to get in my good graces, I hope you realize that. Think roses, think jewelry, think a lot of apologizing–”

Dean cut the other man off with a kiss that was soft and gentle but still filled with so much passion. He pulled back a moment later, before Castiel got the chance to. “I’m sorry, Cas,” he whispered. “I really am. I shouldn’t have said that. I shouldn’t have taken anything out on you. You are my family. You are part of this family whether my father likes it or not. And I don’t plan on letting you go any time soon,” he breathed. 

Castiel relaxed at that, seeing the sincerity in Dean’s eyes. He let his shoulders drop and he pressed his forehead against Dean’s. He wanted to keep being mad at Dean, he really did. But when he was saying things like that to him… how was he supposed to be? “You still have a lot of apologizing to do, Winchester.”

Dean laughed. “I do,” he said. “But as long as my angel is speaking to me…” he shook his head. “I can apologize forever.”

Castiel smiled softly at that, feeling another kiss as Dean tucked him underneath his arm. He thought about Dean’s words.  _ Forever.  _ Did Dean see them together that long? Forever was a long time.

“That beautiful smile helps too,” he whispered into his ear. 

Castiel rolled his eyes. “I’m still expecting flowers and jewelry,” he muttered. “Go. We have to get to a funeral home,” he said. 

 

Dean and Castiel were in and out of the funeral home, really. Even if there was a lot of security, with Dean providing the distraction and Castiel using his sneaking abilities– that impressed the both of them– they were able to get more than enough of the dead man’s blood. 

When they brought it back to the motel, John actually seemed surprised and pleased that they were able to do what, Castiel thought, was such a menial task. Nevertheless they suited up and readied a trap. 

“I’m going down there with Dean,” Castiel said as they talked about how they were going to leave Dean in a nowhere spot and they knew the vampires would track him.

Castiel wasn’t too happy about using his boyfriend as the bait but Dean was one of their strongest and both John and Sam were better aim with a crossbow so they decided on Dean. But that left him nowhere and he would be damned if Dean didn’t have backup.

“The hell you are,” John growled. “You’ll ruin the whole thing.”

Castiel spun around, leveling a look at the older man. He was getting really sick of this. John didn’t talk to him and when it did it was to tell him he was wrong. “Oh, I highly doubt that.” 

John scoffed. “Oh you mean like you didn’t ruin it in the barn. In and out, that was all it was going to be and you just had to save the girl, play hero.”

Dean sucked in a breath as he heard his father and his boyfriend begin to go at each other. He knew they didn’t see eye to eye. Hell, they butted heads worse than John and Sam did. But he didn’t want them fighting. He didn’t want anyone fighting. 

Castiel’s jaw clenched. “Well if you wouldn’t have done the very same then you’re not that much of a savior, are you? And we were all in the barn and they’ll think they’re getting two for one. I’m small, I look helpless but I’m not and Dean’s not going down there alone. Not to mention I’m a crap shot with a crossbow. You and Sam don’t need me.”

“I said no–” John advanced. 

Dean moved to break it up but Sam stopped him. Dean wriggled for a moment, his jaw clenching as he looked behind him, wondering why on earth Sam would stop him. “Sam, let me go.”

“No, you need to let  _ them _ go. Dad needs to realize that not everyone is going to fall in line and that Cas is here to stay. You have to let them duke it out. If it comes to blows we’ll intervene,” Sam whispered. 

Dean finally pulled his arm away from Sam’s hold but he stayed rooted to the spot as he watched, deciding that maybe Sam was right. Maybe the two of them needed to have it out. He didn’t like it. The last thing he wanted was for Cas to get hurt or for his Dad to feel like that was okay but… this was beginning to feel like it wouldn’t end. 

“You seem to do a lot of that, John. But the funny thing about that? You’re their father, not mine. So you mean nothing to me as far as authority,” Castiel said as he squinted his eyes, looking at him defiantly. 

John grabbed for him and brought him in. “Boy, I will lay you flat on your ass,” John threatened. “I’m bigger, older, and wiser and if you want into this you fall in line.”

“Give it a go,” he growled back, meeting his eyes. “You don’t scare me as much as you’d like to,” he informed as he pried John’s hand from him. “You walk around like you know everything but the three of us have been pulling people from buildings, saving people, and getting more done than you give them credit for. And we did it all without the help of John fucking Winchester. You think you’ll come back and I’ll go running because I’m just some fairy boy playing with monsters. But I’m here to stay. And I don’t take orders so I especially don’t take them from you.” Castiel moved and picked up what he would need, hiding his weapons like Dean had taught him. “I go with Dean. That’s final,” he muttered before he slammed the door open and went out to the car. 

John stood there fuming. He’d never had to deal with this sort of thing. Sam and Dean always fell into line. Sure there was a bit of rebellion at some times but he was usually able to snap them out of it. He was usually able to shake it from them. But this kid… this kid was a thorn in his side. 

“Your boyfriend needs an attitude check,” John grunted as he grabbed his own things and headed outside to his own truck. 

Sam breathed as he looked at Dean, both of them relaxing from the amped position they were in as they’d readied to break up a fight. But now they didn’t need to do that. “He called him your boyfriend. I’d say that’s progress,” he offered his brother. 

Dean sighed softly and shook his head. “Yeah, well I got a feeling it’s a one percent piece of progress on a one hundred percent scale,” he grumbled as he reached for his own things. “Come on. We better get going before they begin glaring at each other through the windows.”

 

“Angel, you know you really didn’t have to come out here with me,” he said as he put a hand on the small of his back, leaning over the front of the impala. 

This was their plan. It wasn’t really much of a plan. They knew that if they went out into the night and simply portrayed helpless, it would call to the vampires like a worm on a hook. They’d think it an easy kill. So to give it that extra bit they needed, they propped the hood of the impala open and really made it look like they were having car trouble. 

Castiel knew what Dean meant, but he played it off in case they were being listened to. “And wait by myself in the car? In the dark? No way,” he muttered. 

“Car trouble for the happy couple?” they heard. Both of them turned around to see a woman approaching them with somewhat of a sexy walk, though she should have known she was barking up the wrong tree. “I’ll give you a lift,” she smiled. “Take you back to my place,” she said as she looked them both over. 

Dean pretended to look as if he was considering but his face quirked. “Nah, I think we’ll pass. You see me and my boyfriend, we’ve thought about threesomes but we usually draw the line at necrophilia.”

Right then she seemed to know it was over and she made a noise before she brought her hand up and back handed Dean so hard he went to the ground. 

“Dean,” Castiel said, reaching for him. “Are you okay?” he asked, his first and only thought his boyfriend. 

“Yeah, angel. I’m okay,” he mumbled as Castiel pulled him up, both of them seeing someone else come out of the woods and in a moment they knew it was her own backup.  

The female vampire grabbed them both by the faces, lifting them up. It was enough to hurt but they didn’t say anything as they watched the man behind her, wondering what he was going to do before they tried anything. 

Dean was the one that groaned. “Don’t normally get this friendly ‘til the second date. But as you can see, I’m taken,” he said, his eyes casting to Cas. 

The woman smiled. “You know, we could have some fun,” she muttered as she looked between the both of them. “I always like to make new friends.”

Castiel watched as she pulled Dean in, looking like she was about to kiss him. He wanted to say the thought didn’t bother him even in a setting like this where they had to play dumb, play helpless… but it still got to him and he couldn’t hold back anymore. Even with himself up in the air the way he was, he brought his leg up and kicked her hard in the knee that was enough to rock her, make her buckle slightly before she was turning on him, gripping them harder. 

“You’ll have to forgive my boyfriend. He gets a bit jealous,” Dean had time to say before a sound cut through the night and an arrow buried itself in the man’s chest, another coming a second later and landing in hers. 

At the feeling, she dropped Dean and Cas, Dean’s arm going around Cas immediately to make sure he was okay. 

“Dammit,” the woman said as she looked down to see the point sticking out of her chest. As Sam and John emerged from their hiding spot in the woods, she looked to them, a slight smirk on her face. “Barely even stings.”

“Give it time, sweetheart,” John advised with a smirk of his own as he approached her, Sam keeping his own blade on the man in case he decided to run or try and save the girl. “That arrows soaked in dead man’s blood. It’s like poison to you, ain’t it?” he asked, though the question was rhetorical. 

He had to admit that it was satisfying to watch her smile falter as she seemed to feel it course through her veins now that she was aware of it. She gave John one last look before she was fainting, Dean and Cas catching her from where they were.   

“Load her up,” he ordered, turning to Sam. “I’ll take care of this one,” he nodded. 

Sam only paused for a moment before he nodded as well and moved to help Dean and Cas get the woman in the truck. 

It didn’t take them long to get to another secluded place, tying the vampiric woman to a tree so that she couldn’t escape once the dead man’s blood wore off. 

Castiel was tasked with watching her as Sam built a fire, John handing Dean some sort of mixture that would mask their scent from the vampires. He couldn’t hear completely what they were saying but he knew what it was. Saffron, skunk’s cabbage, and trillium. He remembered reading about the mixture in Elkins’ journal and how you were supposed to rub the ashes on your clothes.

He heard Dean say that it stunk and he rolled his eyes. “ _ That’s the idea _ ,” he thought to himself just as John said it, telling them what to do with the ashes just as he’d predicted. 

Sam nodded. “And you’re sure they’ll come after her?” he asked. 

“Vampires mate for life. She means more to the leader than that gun but the blood sickness is going to wear off soon. You don’t have a of of time.”

Sam considered it. “Half an hour ought to do it.”

John nodded. “And then I want you two out of the area as fast as you can.”

Dean and Sam made quick eye contact, Dean standing there a little surprised but he recovered quickly, looking at his father. “Dad, you can’t fight them all on your own,” Dean said, confused as to why his Dad was splitting them up again.

“I'll have her. And the Colt,” John offered, trying to relay to his sons that he would be fine. 

Sam gave a look, one of disbelief as he knew what his father was trying for. Okay. If his father wanted to be reckless, he could live with that in some aspects. But what about them? What about their side in all of this? “But after. We're gonna meet up, right? Use the gun  _ together _ . Right?”

John didn’t say anything. He cast his eyes away from his sons, even looking over to where Castiel was making sure the vampire wasn’t moving from her restraints any time soon but he didn’t answer Sam.

“You're leaving again, aren't you?” Sam accused. “You still wanna go after the demon alone. You know, I don't get you. You can't treat us like this.”

John frowned. “Like what?” he rebutted. 

“Like children.”

“You are my children. I'm trying to keep you safe,” John countered.

Dean seemed to nod at his father's words but he wasn’t really having whatever John was selling. “Dad, all due respect but, uh, that's a bunch of crap,” he said. 

Sam and John both snapped their heads up at the same time as if wondering if Dean had really said such a thing. Even Castiel looked up from his place by the vampire, having heard Dean’s words. None of them had thought that Dean would talk to his father like that. Then again they hadn’t pictured it in the motel either but this wasn’t the first time since John had been back that Dean was a bit defiant. 

“Excuse me?” John started.

‘You know what Sammy and I have been hunting. Hell you sent us on a few hunting trips yourself,” he said with a humorless chuckle as he held his arms out a little before releasing back down. “You can't be that worried about keeping us safe,” he shook his head. 

“It's not the same thing, Dean–”

“Then what is it?” Dean asked, clearly getting angry with his father. “Why do you want us out of the big fight?”

John’s eyes trailed over his boys before he looked over at Castiel briefly and then back again. Dean readied for his father to say something negative about his lover. He practically  _ dared _ him to because at this point, he wasn’t having it and John would get more than a little defiance. But John seemed to think better of it. 

“This demon? It's a bad son of a bitch. I can't make the same moves if I'm worried about keeping you alive.” 

Dean clenched his jaw as he analyzed John’s words, wondering if he truly meant that he wanted them out of the fight because he didn’t want to have to worry about saving Cas. He was about to open his mouth and tell his father about him. About how Cas was one of the most gifted fighters he’d ever met and he’d been doing it for a lot shorter of a time than most. But when he looked at his father’s features, the true meaning behind it, it clicked. “You mean you can't be as reckless,” he corrected.

John was quiet for just a moment moment as he debated on how to say the next bit, how to speak to his sons. “Look…” he began. “I don't expect to make it out of this fight in one piece. Your mother's death ... it almost killed me. I can't watch my children die too. I won't.”

Sam and Dean watched their father get emotional, something that didn’t really happen too often. Yes, Sam had had a moment with his Dad when Cas and Dean were out getting the dead man’s blood. It was a moment he wouldn’t soon forget. But that didn’t mean that they had to agree, get on board with that was going through their father’s head. No matter what… John was the only parent they had left. 

“What happens if you die?” Dean spoke before Sam could. “Dad, what happens if you die, and we coulda done something about it? You know I been thinking. I ...think maybe Sammy's right about this one. We should do this together,” he said, seeing his brother nod in agreement out of the corner of his eyes. “We're stronger as a family, Dad. We just are. You know it. Cas too,” he whispered. 

John seemed to consider it for a moment, his eyes flicking to where Castiel was listening but he cast his eyes back down. “We're running out of time. You do your job and you get out of the area. That's an order.”

Dean looked away as John walked off, leaving his sons there angry and hurt. All they ever wanted was to help their father, be a part of a family that John barely remembered they had. Or at least that was what it felt like. He gave orders and expected them to follow along. He played hero and sacrificed himself like he was still the military man he had been before he met Mary. But what about them? What about the boys that never got to be children? Who still wanted their father?

Dean’s eyes looked up and he caught Castiel’s gaze. Just from looking into the blue, thoughtful, eyes; he knew Castiel had heard everything. He knew that his boyfriend knew exactly what was going on and that he was empathizing. 

Dean walked over and Castiel slipped his arms around him, kissing him softly. Dean made a soft noise at the feeling, Castiel always knowing exactly what he needed. “I thought you were still a little mad at me?” he whispered against plush lips when the kiss broke. 

Castiel cupped his cheek and smiled up at him gently. “You’re my boyfriend. And I… I’m here when you need me whether I’m mad at you or not,” he said. 

Dean looked into his eyes and for the first time, three little words were on the tip of his tongue. He opened his mouth to say them but he wondered if here and now would cheapen them. Should he really be telling Cas now by a vampire tied to a tree, only illuminated by a fire that smelled so horrible that it was nauseating? 

“You mean so much to me,” he whispered as he kissed him one more time. “Come on. We have to help my Dad load her back into his truck.”

Castiel nodded as Dean helped him get her down and walk her back to John’s truck. After rubbing the ashes of the noxious concoction on their clothes, the four of them split up. John took his truck to the highway, convinced the vampires would get to him before he even hit the border of the town while they went toward the barn. 

When they got there, the other vampires were already gone. Probably chasing after John just like he said and it gave them the perfect opportunity. 

Dean went in first, sneaking in through the same passage they had gotten through earlier that day. He slunk around, seeing only one vampire. He watched as he seemed to hear Dean but not in the right place. He gripped his machete as he turned toward the door, frowning at it as if he was waiting for something to come through it. When nothing did, he moved to turn around, but there Dean was. 

The hunter smirked. “Boo,” he said before he swung his machete and took his head clean off. He whistled then, giving Cas and Sam the go-ahead to come in. 

Castiel and Sam rushed in, moving to help Dean as he moved to the cages that ran along the far wall. “I told you I’d be back,” Dean uttered as he moved to break into the cages. Castiel followed suit, moving to break the brackets that held them in. 

They emptied the nest out quickly, calling 911 as soon as they were able too. They wrapped them in what cloth they could find and told them all to stay just inside the barn, to not move and that help was on the way. Though, as soon as Dean hung up with emergency services, he pointed toward the impala. 

“Let’s go. We still have time,” he said. 

“Time for what?” Sam questioned, though he followed his brother. 

“To save Dad.”

As soon as they were all in, Dean gunned it. He raced through until he got to a point where he knew they would have to leave the car. He grabbed the crossbow and lead the other two through the trees until they got to where they could see their father and the vampires having it out in the middle of the road.   

They played onlooker for only a moment as the woman in John’s arms reeled back and hit him hard. Dean loaded the crossbow, one second too late as he watched his father go flying against the truck and he set the shot, sending an arrow through one the vampires and getting the attention of the leader before anything else could happen.  

“Go!” he ordered. 

The three of them moved from the forest as Dean was able to take down another. Sam ran ahead, moving to take on a different one as the leader came for Castiel; who was going for John. 

At first, Castiel had moved to take him on but he was quickly clotheslined and his machete dropped to the ground. When his back hit the pavement, he wondered briefly if he hadn’t bitten off more than he could chew with this. The vampire was probably hundreds of years old and he’d only been at this hunting job a few months. No matter how quick of a study he was, e definitely thought better when the leader lifted him from the ground. 

“Cas!” he heard from Dean and before he could even react, the vampire had him in a headlock, facing Dean in such a way that Castiel was finding it hard to breathe and his hands clawed at the mans arm. 

“Don’t, I’ll break his neck,” the leader growled at Dean, seeing Sam behind him. 

Castiel made a noise as his eyes found Dean’s and the hunter looked at the vampire with a death glare for having his boyfriend in such a hold. He debated on what to do but as the vampire seemed to squeeze tighter and make more demands, he knew what he had to. “Okay!” he growled back. “It’s gonna be okay, angel,” he whispered. 

At that, the leader seemed to get angry. “You people,” he said between clenched teeth. “We have just as much a right to live as you do.”

“I don’t think so,” John said from behind them. 

The sound of his voice made the vampire spin around, only to meet the barrel of the colt, pointed directly at him. John didn’t give anyone time to react as he pulled the trigger and took the shot. As it landed directly in his forehead, the vampire let Castiel go loosely before Dean was pulling his boyfriend back and gripping him as if making sure he was really there in his hands. 

They watched as something seemed to flash from the leader's body and as he dropped to his knees, the woman that John had dubbed his mate screamed his name. The bullet seemed to infect him from the inside out now that it was lodged into his skull. As the blood dripped down him and he fell to the ground, it was like electricity was coming from beneath his skin. Then, with a final flash from his head, he collapsed and it was no question that he was dead. 

The three of them stood there in shock as they watched what happened. Yes it was rumored that the gun would kill anything but it seemed to  _ decimate  _ the man. It seemed to do all but take the body in its wake and that in itself was enough to reckon with. 

“Kate, no!” they heard and they looked back to see one of the vampires pulling the leaders mate along before she could attack John and make it worse for them. Her eyes never left John as they got in the car and sped away, almost like a promise she’d find him and kill him one day. Though John was anything but scared. In fact, as the car's tires screeched up ahead, John looked at his boys, giving a small grin as if to say ‘we did it.’

 

They were quiet as the three of them packed up, readying to get out of Boulder, Colorado and on to somewhere else where there weren’t straggling vampires looking to kill them. Of course they didn’t know that there were any left looking for revenge but they weren’t going to take any chances either. 

It was that moment, as they were almost done, that John decided to come in. “So, boys…” he started as the three of them turned and he seemed to address all of them for the first time, including Cas. “You ignored a direct order back there,” John said. 

“Yes, sir,” Sam confirmed. 

“But we saved your ass,” Castiel said. 

Dean and Sam both gave a sideways look at Cas, who stood between the brothers as he both physically and metaphorically  _ inserted _ himself into the family. They looked at him for a moment, even after everything, as if wondering if he was crazy.

John gave a long look to Castiel before he gave a slight nod. “You’re right.”

“He is?” the brothers sounded together. 

“We may not get along or like each other. I may not like what you and my son get up to– hell, I don’t even think you belong here,” John said, though he watched as Castiel only held his head higher as if making a point. “But at every turn you’ve kept my boys in one piece. You charged into a scenario you knew nothing about and when it came down to it, you made a play to risk your life for mine. And for that I’ll respect you even if I don’t like you,” he said, pausing. “It scares me. These boys, they’re all I’ve got,” he offered, still addressing Castiel. “But I think you boys are right,” he said as he looked at Dean and Sam. “We are stronger as a family. Everyone here. So if you’re going to be apart of this family… we go after this damn thing.  _ Together. _ ”

Dean had never been so happy to hear his father say the word family. Usually when he said it felt like it was out of obligation. Sam had a duty to his family and he broke that when he went to school. Dean had an obligation to his family which is why he got saddled with watching his sibling while other kids got to do normal things growing up. But when he included Cas, when he even acknowledged that Castiel was in the room… it gave him hope that John would come around to Cas. 

Castiel didn’t like that John had to pointedly say he still didn’t like him but John got one thing right: the feeling was mutual. But he would work with him for Dean and Sam’s sake, for them to have peace of mind over their mother and Sam’s girlfriend.

“Yes, sir,” they said together, the three of them. 

John gave a small smile as he looked at all of them, feeling like for the first time… he had a chance of taking down the thing that had ripped Mary from them all those years ago. And for the first time in a long time, he felt like peace might be on the horizon. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this is more of a filler chapter, more is going to happen in the next! We are going to see Sam's visions continue as well as begin more with the mystery man inside them! Excitement to come!


	6. Everything Wrong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They all go after the demon and Sam's visions are back.

_ The lamp sat outside in the hall, on, while the dark nursery contrasted it. The light versus the dark. A mother rocked her baby in the nursery that was decorated with soft pinks that were visible even in the void of light, giving the hint to anyone that looked onwards that the baby was a presumably a little girl.  _

_ The lack of light both inside and on the opposite side of the window gave way that it was night and it was clearly time for the small baby to sleep instead of wriggling away like she seemed to be doing. Though, that was what babies did; they went to sleep when they wanted to. _

_ The woman, with fair skin and dark hair, crooned to her daughter softly as she laid her down in her crib for the night. She seemed to understand that the baby wasn’t going to just give up and close her eyes, not when there were so many things to look at even though she spent every night in the room.  _

_ The whistle of a train sounded, breaking the woman out of her thoughts as she looked toward the clock, trying to figure out what time it was and why the train seemed so late.  _

**_Nothing was steady about any of it. It seemed to shake and a new angle came into play._ **

_ A different kind of lamp, one where ballerina’s danced in changing positions. The mechanics of it seemed to be on a swivel so that the ballerina’s spun and casted against the wall to give a lighting effect.  _

_ The woman looked to a clock face that had a baby on it, sleeping amongst the stars and the clouds inside a crescent moon.  _

**_Something interrupted._ **

_ The woman pushed the door to the nursery open with one hand only to reveal a shadowy figure standing by the crib. _

**_Another change._ **

_ She looked from the clock to the window before walking over and peering out. She seemed to feel some sort of unease, though she didn’t know what might be coming for her.  _

Sam came out of it panting, his fingers pressed against his head as he tried not to think about how much pain the vision had caused him. He stopped to think about it for only a moment and process what he’d seen before he was reaching into his bag and looking for a map of the town they were currently in. 

“Train,” he muttered as he dug into his bag.

He looked down at the map and quickly found a neighborhood that the train ran right through. The volume that the whistle was, it would have had to have been close to the house in his vision. 

As he took off toward the house, he thought more about what he’d seen, frowning the whole time. He’d not had a vision since the one’s he’d had about the man in the alley and then in the warehouse. He’d actually thought that maybe he wouldn’t be getting them anymore but it was foolish to think that. 

He stopped to process everything right from the very beginning. They were in Salvation, Iowa in the first place because it was where his father had told them that the signs of the demon had begun to crop up again. They’d hightailed it there, finding out that one of their long time friends was dead on the way. 

He remembered the way he’d gotten emotional about it all, the way Castiel had consoled him when his father had told them that when he’d disappeared a year before it had been to chase the demon. But that hadn’t exactly been what had set him off. It was when his father informed them that the demon had a trail; he was going after the families on the night of their children’s six month birthday. 

Sam had lost it at first. So all of this? It was his fault? And he was just supposed to deal with that? He was supposed to be okay with it and just say ‘oh well’? His mom had died because the demon was trying to get to him. Jess had died for the same reasons. It didn’t sit right with him. 

It was only after Castiel had calmed him and convinced him it wasn’t his fault that they could move on and that was when his father had told them that he’d noticed patterns and signs that popped up days before the fires would happen, just like it did in their home. Things like cattle deaths and electrical storms would pop up just days before one of the fires and that when John had looked back, he’d seen them in both Lawrence and in Palo Alto.

Which brought them to Salvation, Iowa. It was where John had said he was finding the next set of signs. They were popping up there and so they raced into town and split up in order to cover more ground. Unfortunately it tasked them with looking up every single baby that would be six months old in the next week. John went in one direction, Sam the other, and Cas and Dean in another. 

It was outside the hospital, about to go back to the others, that Sam got the vision. It was… harrowing to say the least. His visions… they’d never been so  _ shaky _ before. He was used them by now. He was used to how they looked and felt– he was even used to the pain. But that vision had been different. Nothing lined up. Nothing went from point A to point B. It seemed to go everywhere and it wasn’t cohesive. 

But he knew that every time he had a vision, it usually pointed to the thing that killed his mother and Jess. Only recently did he know that it usually had something to do with the demon. It wasn’t much to go on but it was a lead. So he had to follow it. 

That left him running along the street he thought was most likely to have a house on it where the whistle of the train would be so audible. He followed his map, running through a small park where some kids were playing. He had only stopped to get a better look at the map when he felt the pain in his head again and he groaned, seeing the ballerina lamp like he had before. He tried to shake from it a bit but it only kept coming and his face scrunched as he was thrown into the vision again. 

_ The ballerina’s danced across the room like they were supposed to, illuminating the dark room as best as it could, though another lamp sat on top of the dresser next to it. The mother looked at the clock once more before she made her way to the window.  _

**_The image shook._ **

_ She peered out the window, lifting back the curtain as she listened to the sound of the train in a thoughtful manner.  _

**_Another change._ **

_ She pushed the door open to find a figure standing by her child’s crib.  _

The image shook from him once more and when Sam opened his eyes, he was back on the edge of the street as he gripped at his head. Okay. So maybe he still wasn’t used to the pain. 

He looked up and around him, trying to get back to the task at hand when he happened to look across the street and his jaw set as he looked at the window he recognized from his vision. He frowned in thought before he heard the sound of wheels on the pavement and he looked over to see the woman from his vision pushing a baby stroller and holding an umbrella. 

He collected himself and ran over, introducing himself like he was some guy in the neighborhood. He talked to her briefly, learning that Monica’s daughter Rosie was six months that day. 

It was hard to digest when everything became clear. This was the family. This was the family that was to be hurt like theirs was. There was no telling if the baby would survive the fire or if Rosie would ever be the same after what was bound to happen to her mother. It shook him to the core and it had taken him a few moments to recover. Everything was happening tonight. 

When Monica walked away, Sam finally felt something else. He felt his head begin to pound once more and his splitting headache returned. He clutched his eyes as he got an image of fire, images of what he was now sure was Rosie’s bedroom before the vision stabilized and everything came into view. 

_ The ballerina’s danced as they should, the light thrown to every wall it could reach. Some of the shapes held up and some did not but it was all the same to little Rosie.  _

_ The mobile over her bed swayed slightly; the clown that hung down the lowest seeming to smile knowingly, creepily. As if it knew what was about to happen to the little girl in the crib as well as the mother.  _

_ Something in the room sang to the little girl, no doubt trying to lull her to sleep. The soft ticking of the clock on the wall gave hints that it was the clock for when it stopped, as did the music.  _

_ The room became eerily quiet and though the lights were still on, it all seemed darker somehow. A heavy wind howled through the room, causing the clown to sway a bit more violently above little Rosie’s bed… who just watched above her, not seeming to know or care what was going on.  _

_ A dark shadow approached the crib, though that was all it seemed to be; a shadow. It stood there, looming over the bed of the innocent baby like it had some sort of plans for the girl in the crib. Though as good as she was, Rosie didn’t cry. She simply held the pacifier in her mouth and stayed quiet.  _

**_A change._ **

_ Monica, in a nightgown, approached the room at the end of the hallway; presumably the nursery. She pressed a hand to the door and pushed it open gently and without a thought. When she did she came face to face with the shadow looming over Rosie.  _

_ It was a man, that much could be deduced from the figure. And when Monica realized what was going on, she gasped in surprise and fear. A man was in her home, standing over her child. She had no clue how he’d gotten in, who he was, or what he wanted with her baby so it was only natural that she was afraid.  _

_ “What are you–” she went to ask, but no sooner did the words escape her mouth was she forced back against the wall by an invisible force. She made a noise of pain as she was suddenly forced up the wall. She was confused and scared as her body moved without anything moving it. Her head bumped the ceiling as she just seemed to keep moving until she was positioned over Rosie’s crib, pinned to where she was. “Rosie!” she yelled, the force that was pinning her causing her pain right before a cut opened her stomach and blood dripped down.  _

_ She cried out, her cries pleading with who or what was doing this but the seemed to fall on deaf ears. And then all at once, flames surrounded her and engulfed the room.  _

Sam felt the vision stop and he waited, eyes closed for the moment as he waited for everything to subside. It only usually took a little bit for the pain to go down to a dull roar but for some reason… it wasn’t doing that this time and suddenly he was thrown into another vision. 

_ The man swayed a little in the back of the van he was in, his hands tied behind his back. The inside of the van looked like that of a paddy wagon; a police van. He seemed to be cuffed to a chain and that chain was cuffed to the bolted loop on the floor.  _

_ His head hung low just like it had in the warehouse. He was covered in blood and the honey color of his hair was matted and dingy. Some of it was blood but some of it was just dirty.  _

_ Cuts could be seen littering his arms as he gripped and released the chains he was bound in, a rhythmic manner to it as if he was debating how much strength it would take to break them or slip out of them. As he dropped them, it was to the realization that it was more strength that he had.  _

_ The van came to a halt and the man looked up only for a second. “About three hours,” he spoke to himself, his voice ragged from non-use other than the occasional scream to let his torturer know that he was still hitting all the right spots.  _

_ Voices could be heard on the other side of the van; two females and one male. He recognized the voice of the woman that had caught him in the alley, the one that had been torturing him for he didn’t know how long.  _

_ When the doors opened, though, it was to something that was terribly familiar; another abandoned building. No one else could be seen but he briefly realized that anyone he saw or might have been there… would be with this girl. Before he could even think about calling for help, the woman was crawling into the van and gagging him.  _

_ “You’re gonna behave. You’re going to walk normal. You’re not going to pull from us or try and make noises for help because if you do, you’re going to lose an appendage,” he growled right before a bag was put over his head, plunging him into darkness.  _

“He’s alive,” Sam gasped as he came back to the real world. 

 

Sam sat in the chair at the motel as John sat on one bed and Dean on the other while Castiel stood by Sam in the little kitchen. Sam gripped the bridge of his nose and tried to calm himself, tried to hope that the aspirin Castiel had given him would take effect soon. 

“A vision,” John said flatly. 

Sam sighed. He’d had to tell his father what was happening. He was forced to tell him that he had found, without a doubt, who was going to be targeted by the demon that night. And of course he knew that he couldn’t just tell his father that he was right and that he needed to trust him, no. He needed to tell him the whole thing. 

So he did. He told him everything about Monica, Rosie… and about the visions he’d had in the past. He came clean. He just didn’t tell his father about the man he had visions about. 

“Yes,” he muttered, having answered that already. It felt like the sixth time he had. He didn’t know how long his father was going to harp on it. “I saw the demon… burning a woman… on the ceiling,” he said slowly as if his father could get it this time. 

“And you think this is going to happen to this woman you met because…?” John trailed off. 

Sam pulled his hand away from his head long enough to look at John. “Because these things happen exactly the way that I see them, Dad.”

Dean sighed softly as he stood. “It started out as nightmares… then it started happening while he was awake,” he offered his father as he went to the kitchenette to get more coffee.

All the while, their backs turned, they couldn’t see John having somewhat of a freak out that his son was having visions. Castiel, of course, could see it but he seemed to be the only one. 

“Yeah, I don’t know. It’s like closer I get… to anything involving the demon, the stronger the visions get.”

John readjusted, looking at Dean as if this was his fault. “Alright, when were you gonna tell me about this?” he asked. 

The boys both turned and when Dean realized that his father was looking to him for an answer, he felt a little bit of anger. When? How about when his father actually picked up the phone for once? How about when he called them back?

“We didn’t know what it meant,” he said simply, giving his father the chance to back off. 

Of course John didn’t take the hint, his tone only seeming to get angrier, noticing that Castiel wasn’t surprised. So he knew too. “All right, something like this starts happening to your brother, you pick up the phone and you call me,” John demanded, feeling like he was being put on the outside of important information.

Dean gripped the coffee pot before he simply dumped it, turning on his father. Was John seriously blaming this on him? This was his fault now? Like everything else that had ever gone wrong in their lives involving Sam? It was always his fault for not watching out for his little brother. 

“Call you?” Dean asked as he moved closer, an attitude of his own. He gave a humorless chuckle as he strode closer. “Are you kidding me?” he asked. He thought about stopping when John gave him a look, but he was too far in it now. He had to make a point. “Dad I called you from Lawrence, alright? Sam called you when I was dying. I mean, getting you on the phone? I got a better chance of winning the lottery.”

Castiel winced a little when Dean mentioned that he’d almost died. Dean had told him the story. He’d told it to him when they first started together because he wanted Castiel to know how dangerous the supernatural world was and how it couldn’t be played with even for a second. He also taught him that if it seemed too good to be true or too easy… it probably was. But the story still bothered him.

John seemed to nod. “You’re right. I don’t know where this new attitude is coming from,” he said, his eyes trailing to Castiel for a split second as if blaming him but he looked back at Dean. “But you’re right.”

“Well visions or no visions, the fact is, we know the demon is coming  _ tonight _ . And this family is going to go through the same hell we did,” Sam said. 

“No they’re not,” Castiel said softly as he touched Sam’s shoulder. “No one is. Ever again,” he whispered. “We’ll get him. For your mother. For Jessica,” he nodded. 

Sam gave him a look, a small reassured smile… before he phone went off. He looked down at it, frowning as he didn’t recognize the number, though that was something of a norm. He thought nothing of it as he answered it. “Hello?”

“Sam?” a voice came through on the other line.

“Who is this?” he asked, though he recognized the voice immediately. He just couldn’t place who it was. 

“Think real hard it’ll come to you,” she said in a slow drawl, the same drawl that had been on her lips when Sam met her on the side of the road, at the bus station, and then again in Chicago. It was the same voice that was attached to the girl that had tied them up and made a daeva do her bidding. Which threw Sam for an astounding loop.

“Meg,” he said, getting the attention of everyone in the room. 

Dean and John looked up immediately, as did Castiel. Dean and John knew her first hand, they’d had to deal with her in Chicago… but Dean had told Cas what had happened. He knew that the woman in question… well Dean had told him that she died after a seven-story drop to the pavement. There was no way anything  _ human _ could survive that. 

All of them looked around as if she might have been somewhere near the hotel. John stood, readying for a fight as Dean looked out the window; Castiel gripped the blade that he now kept on his side, wondering if he was going to need to use it. 

“Last time I saw you you fell out of a window,” he reminded. 

“Yeah, no thanks to you. That really hurt my feelings by the way,” she said as if it was something as simple as telling her she looked fat in the clothes she was wearing. 

“Just your feelings? That was a seven-story drop,” he reminded in disbelief. He wanted to know how he could be speaking to the woman on the other end. How in the hell was she alive?

She seemed to pause slightly before she was speaking again. “Let me speak to your Dad,” she demanded.

Sam shook his head even though she couldn’t see him as he looked to John. “My Dad. I don't know where my Dad is,” he lied as John crossed the room.

The lie seemed to agitate Meg and her voice got a lot less friendly which was ironic because it wasn’t friendly in the first place. “It's time for the grown ups to talk Sam, let me speak to him now.”

Sam hesitated as he looked up to see John holding his hand out for the phone. He didn’t like the idea of handing the phone over to his father. How did she know he was with them? How did she know who to call? What did she want with their father? He didn’t like the uneasy feeling in his gut… but he still handed the phone to his father.

“This is John,” he said when he put the phone to his ear. 

“Howdy John. I'm Meg,” she said, a smile in her voice. “I'm a friend of your boys. I'm also the one who watched Jim Murphy choke on his own blood...still there John-boy?”

John clenched his jaw. “I'm here.”

“Well that was yesterday. Today I'm in Lincoln,” she informed. 

Immediately John tensed. He knew what–  _ who _ was in Lincoln and he couldn’t help but feel his heart drop. No. This couldn’t be happening.  

“Visiting another old friend of yours. He wants to say hi…”

“John, whatever they do don't give–” his friend started but the phone was pulled away and a shushing sound could be heard, presumably meg.

“Caleb?” John asked. “You listen to me. He's got nothing to do with anything. You let him go.”

“We know you have the colt John,” Meg said flatly. 

John missed a beat for only a second, shaking his head. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Oh, okay. Well listen to this,” she encouraged before the unmistakeable sound of a slice cut through the speaker and someone choking, gasping, and drowning in their own blood could be heard. 

“Caleb. Caleb!” John tried, though he knew it was over when the only response he got was from Meg. 

“You hear that? That's the sound of your friend dying. Now let's try this again. We know you have the gun John, word travels fast. So as far as we're concerned you just declared war. And this is what war looks like. It has casualties.”

John, all at once, was burdened with guilt and sadness. Caleb hadn’t done anything, neither had his friend Jim. They were innocent in this so called war. This was supposed to be between his family and the demon that had taken someone from them. But these people that were being killed… they didn’t deserve these deaths. “I'm gonna kill you, you know that?” he said through gritted teeth.

“Oh John please, mind your blood pressure. So this is the thing. We're going to keep doing what we're doing. And your friends, anyone who has ever helped you, gave you shelter, anyone you ever loved. They'll all die unless you give us that gun.”

John hesitated at the offer she was making, even though it wasn’t much of one. He didn’t know how it had gotten to this but he knew he wasn’t going to have much of a choice. He was going to have to do something, give them something… or else they’d never be able to be free of this. People would keep dying before they got their chance. It would save no one.

“I'm waiting Johnny, better answer before the buzzer.”

“Okay,” John muttered, clearly harboring a hatred for the woman on the other line that he had to say it at all. 

“Sorry? I didn't quite get that.”

“I said okay, I'll bring you the colt.”

John could feel his sons, even Castiel, looking at him like he was crazy. They’d risked everything for the gun,  _ the  _ gun to use on  _ the _ demon. They couldn’t just give it to someone now that they had it. They had to use it.”

“There's a warehouse in Lincoln, on the corner of Wabash and Lake. You're gonna meet me there,” she said. 

“It's gonna take me about a day's drive to get there.”

“Meet me there at midnight tonight.”

“That's impossible. I can't get there in time and I can't just carry a gun on a plane.”

“Well I guess your friends die don't they. If you do decide to make it, come alone. Oh and one more thing, a bit of incentive for you; do anything but show up and the blood of the civilian I have tied up in my van will be on your hands. You’re all about saving people aren't you, Johnny boy? Choose wisely,” she said before she hung up. 

“So you think Meg is a demon?” Castiel asked after they’d gone over everything that Meg had said on the phone starting with knowing they had the colt right down to her saying she had some civilian with her that she would kill if John wasn’t there when she wanted him to be. 

“Either that or she’s possessed by one,” John said. “Doesn’t really matter,” he shook his head. 

“What do we do?” Dean asked from his spot behind Sam, just trying to process all this. How were they going to save the family from the demon at the same time they needed to play backup and rescue in Lincoln?

“I’m going to Lincoln,” John informed without hesitation. 

“What?” Dean asked, even though Castiel knew this was something John had to do. 

“It doesn’t look like I have a choice. If I don’t go… our friends die… a civilian that has nothing to do with any of this, they die… we can’t let that happen.”

“Dad… the demon is coming for Monica and her family tonight. That gun is the only shot we have. We can’t just hand it over–”

“So don’t,” Castiel said from behind them. 

“What?” Sam asked. “That’s the whole point of the meet up.”

“Yes but nearly everyone who’s ever  _ seen _ the gun… they’re dead. And then it’s a few vampires. Everyone that knows what it looks like that’s alive and matters… well they’re standing in this room, aren’t they? So why hand over a gun that no one knows what it looks like… when you can hand over another?”

John nodded. “Exactly what I was thinking.”

Dean’s eyebrows raised as he looked back to his father. “So what, you’re just going to get a ringer from a pawn shop?”

John shrugged a little. “Antique store,” he offered. 

Dean looked at his father like he was crazy and then back at his boyfriend for being on board with such a plan. “You’re going to hand Meg a fake gun and hope she doesn’t notice?”

“As long as it’s close, Dean, she shouldn’t be able to tell the difference,” Castiel said. 

“And when she does? When she figures it out?” Dean said to Cas, getting angry that his boyfriend was on the side of the plan that was leaning toward getting his father killed. 

“Look, I just need to buy a few hours, that’s all,” John said. 

Sam paused. “You mean for the three of us… You want us to stay here and kill the demon by ourselves?”

“No, Sam. I want to stop losing people we love. I want you to go to school, I want Dean to have a home,” he whispered, turning away as he felt tears. “I want…” he breathed, shaking his head a little. “I want mary alive. I just… I just want this to be over,” he nodded 

 

The three of them sat outside the house that Sam had instructed them was the house that held Monica and her family. It had long since turned dark and now they were waiting, waiting for the sign to go in. At the moment, Monica and her husband were finishing their dinner; Monica cleaning up the plates as they sat, watching from afar. 

Dean was preoccupied, thinking of his father at the moment. He was thinking about the conversation they’d had with John before he left to Lincoln. He had been so confident that he could do what he was setting out to do and that this would buy them a few hours. But Dean had to admit that he was scared. Sure he and his father didn’t always get along but the last thing he wanted was for the man to be on a suicide mission. He just hoped he was okay. 

Castiel sat in the back, flipping through a few of the books he had, looking for anything on demons. He knew there was no way to kill them, everything said that. But he wanted to know all he could. “You know… you two did warn me when I got into this… but I have to admit… I hate this part…” he muttered. 

Sam looked back. “What? The calm right before a big fight? The not knowing?”

“The waiting,” he corrected softly. “Those people are in their thinking this is another night like all the ones before. They’re normal. Nice and normal and they don’t know what’s coming for them. I hate not being able to warn them, tell them what’s coming. And so we wait for the right moment… hope that we get there in time…” he trailed off. 

Sam sighed as he silently agreed with the man that was very much like a brother to him now. “I know what you mean,” he muttered. “We could tell them that there’s a gas leak?” he suggested. “Might get them out of the house for a few hours.”

Dean made a face as he looked over at his brother. “Yeah and how many times has that actually worked for us?”

Castiel gave a humorless chuckle as he’d been there for a few attempts. It never usually worked. He leaned forward a little, trying to see something under the streetlight and he saw Sam nod lightly in agreement. 

“We could always tell them the truth,” he tried again. 

The three of them looked up at each other for a moment. “Nah,” they said in unision. 

“I know, I know,” Sam muttered. “It’s just… Cas is right, what’s coming for these people…” he whispered. 

“Sam we only got one move and you know it, all right? We gotta wait for that demon to show itself and then we get it before it gets them,” Dean explained.  

“Even you have to admit, babe, it’s not the most  _ reassuring _ plan. Not if this demon is as powerful as your father seems to think that it is,” Castiel said from the back. 

The mention of John made Sam think. “I wonder how Dad’s doing right about now…”

Dean made a noise. “I’d feel a whole lot better if we were there backing him up.”

“I’d feel a whole lot better if he were here backing us up,” he said, rendering them silent for a few moments. 

After a long while of sitting there, watching the house, Castiel watched as the husband closed the curtains to the house, deeming everything done for the night. Oh how wrong he was. 

“This is weird,” Sam said after a long while. 

“What?” Castiel asked as he looked up. 

“After all these years… we’re actually here. This is the thing that killed mom… killed Jess… and now we’re going to kill it,” he said. “Doesn’t seem real.”

“We just gotta keep our heads and do our jobs like always,” Dean said to his brother. 

“Yeah, but this isn’t like always,” Sam countered. 

“True…”

Sam was quiet for a few beats, looking from Cas to Dean before he cleared his throat. “I wanna thank you guys.”

“For what?” they questioned together. 

Sam chuckled softly. “For that. For everything. Dean, you've always had my back you know? Even when I couldn't count on anyone I could always count on you. And Cas, we’ve only known each other for a short time but it already feels like you’re my brother. I love you like one. I love how you keep Dean sane and me when I need it...And ah...I don't know I just wanted to let you know, Just in case–”

“Whoa whoa whoa, are you kidding me?” Dean cut him off with a look in his eyes that said he was about to slap his little brother silly.

“What?” Sam frowned. 

“Don't say just in case something happens to you. I don't wanna hear that freaking speech man. Nobody's dying tonight. Not us, not that family, nobody. Except that demon. That evil son of a bitch ain't getting any older than tonight, you understand me?”

Sam was quiet but he nodded to his brother. 

Dean turned away and looked back out the window at the house and even Castiel could sense that Dean didn’t believe all of what he just said but he wanted to. Dean wanted to believe that his father was going to come home to them. His brother was going to be okay and Cas was going to wake up by his side tomorrow morning like he did every morning. 

Castiel reached over and threaded his hand through his hair softly, telling Dean he was there and that he wasn’t going anywhere. He smiled softly when he saw Dean visibly relax. 

When it was getting later and later, Dean picked up the phone, deciding to call his father and check on him. He figured that the man would have called them by now, told them he was safe and they took the fake gun. The simple fact that he hadn’t… it left Dean uneasy. 

Dean shook his head as he hung up the phone. “Dad’s not answering.”

“Maybe Meg was late… Maybe cell reception is bad, baby,” Castiel consoled, trying to catch his boyfriend before he sent himself into a downward spiral of worry for his father. 

Dean breathed. “Yeah, well… doesn’t make me feel any better.”

Just then a frequency fluctuation seemed to come through on the radio. Sam frowned and looked down at the radio… that hadn’t really been on in the first place. 

“Dean, wait…” he muttered. “Listen,” he said as he reached down and fiddled with the radio, nothing seeming to come through except more frequency sounds. 

Dean frowned as well as he and Cas looked around. The wind was beginning to pick up, the tree above them shaking wildly and knocking leaves loose to rain down upon them. Lights flickered and the wind only seemed to pick up harder and harder. The three of them looked over to see the lights inside and outside the house going crazy and in an instant they knew. 

“It’s coming,” Castiel muttered as they all got out of the car. 

Dean moved up to the house first, Castiel right behind him as he picked the lock quietly. Normally Castiel found it vaguely hot that his bad boy, hunter, boyfriend could pick just about any lock but now so wasn’t the time to have those thoughts. 

He stuck close behind Dean as they moved quietly into the house. In a moment, he was glad he was where he was as he grabbed Dean and forced him to duck as a bat swung their way. 

“Get out of my house!” the man yelled and they immediately recognized the man as Monica’s husband. 

Dean stood and grabbed for the bat so that he couldn’t swing it any more, even though the man was putting up a great deal of a fight. Of course, he believed they were the bad guys trying to hurt his family but he was putting all his energy to the wrong people. 

It wasn’t long before Dean had the man pinned against the wall, the bat now against his chest and being used against him. 

“Mr. Holden, please,” Sam started, the man looking at him like he wanted to know what kind of burglar begged him? What kind of burglar knew his name?

“Be quiet and listen to me. Be quiet and listen. We are trying to help you,” Dean said.  

“Charlie? Everything okay down there?” they heard from upstairs. 

“Monica get the baby!” he yelled, clearly trying to save his family but he, of course, had it wrong. 

“Don't go in the nursery!” Castiel tried to yell back. “Sam go! We’ve got this,” he nodded. 

“You stay away from her!” he called right before Castiel gave him a hard enough punch that stunned him, allowing Dean to hoist the man over his shoulders and carry him to a spot where he wouldn’t give them any trouble. 

“Help Sam,” Dean said to Castiel. 

Castiel nodded and raced up the stairs just in time to see the figure standing over the nursery looking at Sam. He himself looked to Sam and he could see him hesitating in the slightest but when he saw the yellow eyes of the man, something he was guessing Sam had never seen before, it all made sense as the world seemed to slow around him. 

The yellow eyes had looked to Sam first but then they’d unmistakably landed on him as well, he’d felt like everything was in slow motion. He was moving through jello as he tried to get to the end of the hall to help but he all of a sudden felt like he was going to be sick and his head hurt more than he ever felt it had. It was something he had certainly never seen before and it left him reeling like it was both foreign and familiar. He wanted to know how that was possible. 

Something tripped in his head, like someone had suddenly pulled a lever and everything was wrong. He felt like his life was wrong, his existence– everything was wrong. His head felt like it would split right down the middle and he couldn’t breathe. 

He didn’t blame Sam for freezing at the sight, at being uncertain. Hell, he felt like the whole house was spinning. But he could hear Monica screaming for her child in the background and he knew Sam had to take the shot. It took everything in him as he called Sam’s name out and it got the hunter's attention just before Sam raised the gun and took a shot, but the demon disappeared into thin air, leaving behind a puff of smoke.

As he disappeared, Monica dropped from the ceiling, immediately crying about her child. She clearly wanted nothing more than to get to her baby.  

“Where the hell did it go!?” Sam asked, though he was helping her up as he looked around for the demon. 

“My baby!” she cried as she tried to go for the crib but Sam stopped her in case the demon was still there, in case anything happened. She cried over and over as Sam pulled her out of the room.    
  
Dean came up, rushing past Castiel as he was still in the hall trying to get his bearings about him. He was supposed to be up there helping Sam but instead he’d froze. He didn’t know what was going on. He didn’t know what was happening and it showed when he could barely bring himself to move.

“Dean and Cas got her,” Sam said as he rushed past Castiel with the woman. 

Castiel looked down the hall to see Dean wrap the baby up in her blankets and get her out of the crib just before it exploded into flames. Everything still feeling like jello to him, he didn’t even register until he was halfway down the stairs that Dean had grabbed him and was pulling him down and out of the house. 

As they made it outside, the window to the nursery burst and erupted outward with fire. It shattered the glass and made a deafening sound but at least no one was in there. 

“Get away from my family!” Monica’s husband said as they made it outside. 

“Charlie no! They saved us,” Monica said as she turned to take Rosie from Dean. “They saved us.”

Charlie looked at the three of them, still seemingly unsure of them and what was going on… not to mention his house was on fire behind them all. But he still brought Monica and his child into his arms. He hugged them close, still watching the boys but he didn’t say anything else. 

Sam, seemingly relieved and disappointed at the same time, turned and looked up toward the burning nursery. He looked like a regular person would had they seen a ghost as he realized the demon was still in the nursery just basking in the flames as someone’s home burned. 

“It’s still in there,” he said, clearly angry that he hadn’t gotten a shot at it. He’d wasted a bullet. 

As he began to surge forward, Castiel, with a now clear head, stepped in front of him as he saw exactly what Sam was going to do. “Sam! Sam no!” he said but as he kept going, Dean intervened and put them both between him and the house. 

“Let me go, it’s still in there!”

“It’s burning to the ground,” Dean said. 

“It’s suicide!” Castiel followed. 

“I don’t care!”

“I do!” they said together. 

Sam clenched his jaw and seemed to stop as they all looked back up at the nursery. They could see the figure, the demon… and then in a twist of the flames, it was gone without a trace. 

 

“Come on Dad, answer your phone damn it,” Dean said as Sam and Castiel sat on the beds, looking off into space. “Something’s wrong,” Dean muttered as he hung up the phone for the upteenth time. He didn’t know how many times he’d tried his father’s phone but he knew something wasn’t good. 

When Dean got no answer, he looked up at the two to see them both simply staring off. Sam’s seemed to be out of anger while Castiel’s… it was much different. He would have to get to the bottom of that...

“You hear me? Something’s wrong. Either of you two care?” Dean asked, a little frustrated that they seemed to be so lost in their own things that they couldn’t see that they had bigger fish to fry. 

“If you had just let me go in there, I could’ve ended all this,” Sam muttered with a shake of his head. 

So much was going through his mind right now. His father was missing, his best friend had frozen in front of the demon, he’d missed the shot… but all he was thinking about was the fact that he could have ended everything if they had just let him go back in the house. It could have been over.

“Sam, the only thing you would have ended was your life,” Castiel said, though he didn’t look up from where he was staring at the wall, trying to work out what had happened back at the house.

“You don't know that,” Sam argued, but it wasn’t as convincing as it maybe should have been. 

Dean moved closer. “So what, you're just willing to sacrifice yourself, is that it?”

“Yeah. Yeah you're damn right I am,” Sam said as if that was something that really needed to happen. 

Dean’s jaw clenched and he looked to Cas before he looked back down at the phone, debating  on what to do but he let his breath go. “Well that's not going to happen, not as long as I'm around,” he muttered. 

“What the hell are you talking about Dean, we've been searching for this demon our whole lives. It's the only thing we've ever cared about,” Sam growled out. 

“Not the only thing. Not anymore. It had been his father’s crusade and he’s strapped them to it. Granted, it sucked Sam back in when it was his girlfriend that was taken… and Dean was sure that if something happened to Cas the way it did to Jess… he would have been in the same head space. But it hadn’t happened to him and so he couldn’t let his father and his brother just kill themselves over something that wasn’t worth it.

“Sam I wanna waste it. I do. Okay? But it's not worth dying over,” he shook his head. 

Sam gave him a look like Dean had just told him he’d killed his puppy, like he’d betrayed him somehow because he didn’t want to die for this. “What?”

“I mean it. If hunting this demon means getting yourself killed then I hope we never find the damn thing–”

“That thing killed Jess. That thing killed Mom. You don’t even know if it could come for Cas too. Maybe it’s the whole family, Dean–”

“Cas is still here!” he growled. He knew it was harsh and he wanted to take it back but he couldn’t help but feel a little anger at his brother for trying to make him feel loss he didn’t have to experience. “You said yourself once, that no matter what we do, they're gone, and they're never coming back.”

As soon as it left his mouth, Sam was grabbing his brother and forcing him against the wall. The words stung more than Dean may have realized. He still had the love of his life. It was sitting on the other side of the room with blue eyes and calling him babe every chance he got. But that was gone for Sam. It was gone for John. The people that they had loved… they were taken by the demon… and he thought Dean would want to do more to stop it. 

“Hey!” Castiel said as soon as Dean’s back hit the wall, standing up. 

“Don't you say that, not you! Not after all this don't you say that–”

“Break it up, you two! Now is not the time to be fighting!” Castiel yelled. “I get it. Tensions are high right now but the last thing we need is to be at each other's throats.” 

The brothers were quiet for a moment and Castiel looked between them. The lashing out was understandable. They were all on edge. They were confused and hurting in some ways. Castiel didn’t know what had happened at the house where as Dean and Sam… the thing they’d been chasing their whole lives not only got away but now knew they were on to him. 

“Sam look,” Dean started. “The four of us...that's all we have...and it's all I have,” he said, a quiver in his voice as his eyes got glassy. “Sometimes I feel like I'm barely holding it together man...and without you and Cas... or Dad…” he whispered. 

Sam had listened to his brother, had processed it as it was coming through. He was still hurting. Beyond belief, actually. But he calmed himself down just enough to see rationally for a moment as he turned away, trying to control the tears. “Dad,” he muttered before he turned back. “He should have called by now. Try him again,” he nodded. 

Dean picked up the phone once more, his head void of thoughts as he did as he was told, something he was good at. He dialed the number again and heard it ring just a couple of times before the phone picked up. 

“You boys really screwed up this time,” a voice said in an almost pleased manner. 

Dean’s jaw clenched, angry as he knew exactly who was on the other line. “Where is he?” he growled. 

“You're never going to see your father again,” Meg said simply. 

Dean hung up and the sheer pain in his face made Castiel reach out. “Baby…?” he whispered, confused as to what was going on. 

“They’ve got Dad,” he said as he pushed away from the wall, though it was towards Castiel’s hands, hoping that they would steady him as he felt like his whole world had just tipped over on it’s head. He believed in his father like he believed in no one else. He believed his father would always come through. Would always come back. So why hadn’t he?

“Meg?” Sam asked. “What’d she say?”

“I just told you, Sammy…” he trailed off as he ran his hand down his face, trying to get his wits about him. “Okay. Okay,” he muttered as he went across the room and tucked the colt into the back of his jeans. 

“What are you doing, Dean?” Sam questioned, following him around the room a little. 

Castiel watched briefly as Dean began to pack his duffel bag and he wasted no time in doing the same. He wasn’t going to argue, not when Dean was like this. He was too serious, too focused.

“Why?”

“Because the demon knows we’re in Salvation, all right,” he said as he put his jacket on. “It knows we got the Colt. It’s got Dad – it’s probably coming for us next.”

“Good. We’ve still got three bullets left. Let it come,” Sam nodded, looking to Castiel for reassurance since he always seemed to be the deciding factor between the two of them but as he watched Castiel pack, he sighed. “You too?”

“Listen, tough guy, we’re not ready, okay? We don’t know how many of them are out there. Now, we’re no good to anybody dead. We’re leaving... Now,” Dean demanded.

It was a mad scramble to get all of their stuff together and then check out of the motel. They didn’t know if someone was coming or when they would get there so they needed to move with certainty. There was no time for delay. There was no time to talk about it. 

Dean gunned it when they were on the road. He wasn’t worried about police or anything. Frankly they could kiss his ass at this point if they felt like tangling with him. No way was he staying in a town where a bunch of monsters that they could kill all of three might be coming for them. 

As they rounded a corner sharply, only then did Sam speak up. 

“I’m telling you, Dean, we could have taken him,” Sam demanded. 

“I know I’m late to the game in all of this but it sounds like a fool's task, Sam. Dean is right. We don’t know if it will be just him and we only have three bullets. We can kill a total of three when there’s one specific demon you’re gunning for. Not to mention we both froze back there…” he paused as he trailed off. “I… I did more than freeze…” he whispered. 

The brothers looked at each other before Dean looked back at the road. That was still something he needed to talk to Cas about. When he came up the stairs, Castiel had been standing there clutching his head like Sam did when he got his visions but that… it was so much different. Castiel was screaming bloody murder and the worst part? He didn’t seem to remember. 

“What we need is a plan,” Dean said, straying from the topic. “Now, they’re probably keeping Dad alive, we just gotta figure out where. They’re gonna wanna trade him for the gun–” he said, though he saw Sam shaking his head out of the corner of his eyes. “What?”

Sam looked uneasy as he thought of the best way to say it but he knew there wasn't one. “Dean, if that were true, why didn’t Meg mention a trade?” He asked quietly. “Dad, he might be…”

“Don't,” Dean demanded. 

“Look, I don’t want to believe it any more than you do. But if he is, all the more reason to kill this damn thing. We still have the Colt. We can still finish the job–”

“Screw the job, Sam!” Dean growled, his head only in one place.

“Dean, I’m just trying to do what he would want. He would want us to keep going.”

“Quit talking about him like he’s dead already. Listen to me, everything stops until we get him back, you understand me? Everything.”

Sam paused at Dean's tone. “So how do we find him?” 

“Maybe we go to Lincoln. Start at the warehouse where he was taken,” Castiel suggested. 

Sam shook his head. “You really think these demons are going to leave a trail?”

Dean paused. “No... You’re right. We need help,” Dean said, speeding up.    
  



	7. Meeting Bobby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter we meet Bobby and we go through the infamous Meg exorcism. It is the second to last chapter. It's going to come to a head and end in the next one!

Night had long since passed and turned into day. They’d been driving non-stop since Salvation, all of them quiet. The three of them were on edge the entire ride and so they hadn’t done much but drive wherever Dean had decided help was for them. They hadn’t stopped or gone to the bathroom, no. They just kept going. 

Castiel had fallen asleep at one point, though his sleep was anything but peaceful. Behind his eyes, all he kept seeing was him reliving what had happened in the house in such a way that, even asleep, it made him nauseous. He saw the way yellow eyes looked at him, surrounded him. He recounted the way the world had moved in slow motion around him and how he hadn’t been able to move. Everything rushed back to him in his nightmares and captured him so much that when he started screaming, just like he had in the house, he didn’t even know. 

Sam had winced at the way Castiel’s deep voice was able to get so high that it felt like he was hitting a frequency that he didn’t know humans could hit. 

Dean winced as well, his eyes casting back at his boyfriend with worry. He didn’t know what was making Castiel scream in such a way but they couldn’t sit there and listen to it and with him driving, it wasn't an option to turn around. He grunted before he looked to Sam. “Wake him up!” he commanded. 

Sam didn’t hesitate to turn around in his seat and reach over the bench, shaking his surrogate brother. “Cas! Cas!” he yelled. “Wake up! It’s just a dream! Wake up!” he called. 

Castiel started awake, sitting up so hard that if Sam hadn’t reacted and moved just in time, they would have butted heads. “What?” he questioned in a groggy tone. “What’s going on? Where are we? What?” he asked all at once. 

Sam’s eyes cast aside to Dean and just by the way his brother looked at him, he knew now wasn’t the time as they pulled down the street from where they needed to be. “You were just… you were calling out in your sleep. I figured you were having a bad dream so I woke you,” he offered. It wasn’t a lie but it wasn’t the truth either. 

Castiel looked around, seemingly confused. He didn’t remember falling asleep. He didn’t remember any of it. He didn’t even remember what was going on inside his head that he would have felt the need to call out in his slumber. But he didn’t think the boys would wake him for no reason. 

He straightened himself out in the car as he ran a hand through his hair. “Oh… alright. Thank you…”

Dean pinched his lips together in thought and tried to take it in. Something was going on inside his boyfriend’s head. Something was going on with him in general. And the worst part was that he was sure that Castiel didn’t know that something was out of place.

He cleared his throat after a moment. “One of our family friends. He’s gonna help us,” Dean said just as they passed under an arch that said ‘Singer Auto Salvage’ in junked letters. 

When they got out of the impala, they were met with a dog that was sitting on the hood of a Ford truck. The entire outside of the house was decorated with hubcaps and scrap metal, only furthering the point that this was the home of a junker but the fact that Dean said that they were going for help… Castiel has a feeling that the house held no ordinary junk man. 

Dean came around and helped Castiel out of the back of the impala, making the man smile. “Dean,” he said softly. “You didn’t need to help me out of the car. I’m perfectly capable.”

Dean gave a small smile as he watched Castiel a bit. “I know, angel. But you know I worry about you,” he whispered as he cupped his cheeks and kissed his lips softly. 

Dean held Castiel’s hand tight as they approached the home. He didn’t know how Bobby would feel about Cas and what he was to him. He didn’t know how the other hunter would react, a man he hadn’t seen in years because his father had made him so angry that when he was with him, he was told not to bother that ‘cantankerous old man’ again. But of course… Bobby had always been like a father to him when John wasn’t.

He knocked on the door and they only waited a few moments before the door opened and Bobby answered. 

As soon as the door opened, Castiel took in the sight of the man. He was older, bearded, but dressed similarly to the way Dean and Sam did: jeans and clothes that they weren’t too attached to. He was wearing a cap on his head that threw off a shadow in the sun but it didn’t hide the surprised expression he wore at seeing the boys. 

He looked from Sam to Dean and then back again before his eyes seemed to land on Castiel. Castiel could almost hear the question that was forming in his mind. But he simply gave a small smile.

Dean gave Bobby his own look, but it wasn’t one of happiness. “Hey, Bobby,” he said softly. “Long time no see…”

Bobby looked at them again before he sighed. “What did you two idjits get yourselves into this time?” he wondered allowed but he still stepped aside and let them in. 

Once they were in, Castiel stood with Dean as he and Sam explained everything that was going on from the part about knowing what had killed their mother, to the colt, all the way until John had gotten taken when they went up against the demon. He watched as Bobby eyed Castiel the whole time and the way he stood close to the eldest Winchester. 

Bobby had pointed to the ceiling where there was a devil’s trap painted. He said that if any demon’s came, which they were sure there would be, it would be end game as long as they could get it in the trap. Of course Sam had asked how he knew that and so Bobby had directed him toward a book. 

When the story was winding down, Bobby walked over and handed Dean a flask. “Here you go,” he said, knowing Dean might need it should the demon come knocking. 

“What’s this; holy water?”

“That one is. This one’s whiskey,” he nodded as he took a swig. 

Dean eyed him before it was offered and he took his own drag from the small flask. He definitely needed that right about now. 

“Well… if you don’t mind me askin’... who’s this ya got with you?” Bobby asked. 

Bobby didn’t mean to be rude, if it sounded like he was. He just didn’t know the third man and it was very uncommon for the Winchester’s to ally themselves with anyone. Not to mention, Sam and Dean spoke freely in front of this boy. Which meant he was on the up and up. So who was he?

Dean looked down at Castiel and smiled a little before he looked back to the other man, sliding his hand into Castiel’s. “This is Castiel. He’s my boyfriend,” he said softly. It was much easier to say to Bobby, much easier to be himself around the man that he considered a secondary father. He knew that Bobby would never react to Cas the way John did. Or at least he didn’t think he would. 

Bobby eyed Castiel and Dean, a little surprise. Even though it had been a long time since he’d seen Dean and Sam, Dean had always been a womanizer. He chased anything in heels and a bra but this… this was something different. Castiel… was clearly male. Not that he had a problem with that, he just hadn’t expected it. Though, he hadn’t expected the word  _ boyfriend _ either. Because as Dean once said: he didn’t do relationships. So he had to wonder what was special about this boy?

“Boyfriend, huh?” Bobby asked. 

Dean stiffened a little at that, briefly thinking that Bobby  _ did _ have a problem with it. “Yes, sir,” he said. 

Bobby’s head snapped up at Dean. “Don’t you come at me with that ‘sir’ bull-hockey, boy. I may be old like ‘im. But I ain’t your Daddy and I won’t be havin’ that sir.”

Castiel smiled and tightened his hand in Dean’s to get his attention. “I like him,” he said. 

Dean chuckled softly and reached up, bringing his thumb across his jaw gently. “Well then maybe you and him will get along better than you and my Dad, huh?”

Bobby watched them, the way they looked into each other’s eyes like they were the only two people in the room. He watched the way Dean looked at Castiel with such  _ adoration _ and love that it was easy to see why this boy was with them… because it was clear that Dean wasn’t stupid enough to let that get away. He was happy for him, really. Even if he would have preferred Dean get out all together. He didn’t see that happening until at least this demon business was done. 

He looked to Sam, as if asking if they did this often. The younger boy only gave him a look that confirmed that they did it constantly. 

“I’m not surprised you don’t get along with him,” Bobby said, breaking them from each other a bit. “John Winchester… not always the easiest man to get along with.”

Dean looked back to Bobby, his words reminding him of the last time he’d seen Bobby. “Yeah… to tell you the truth, I wasn’t sure if we should come.”

“Nonsense,” Bobby said. “Your Daddy needs help.”

Dean snorted a bit. “Well, yeah, but last time we saw you, I mean, you did threaten to blast him full of buckshot. Cocked the shotgun and everything,” he said. 

Castiel’s eyebrows raised. “What, seriously?” he asked. 

Bobby looked over and nodded. “John has that effect on people.”

Dean made another noise, thinking of the way he and Sam were constantly going head to head– and with Castiel most recently. “Yeah, I guess he does.”

“None of that matters now, though. All that matters is that you get him back,” Bobby nodded.

“Bobby, this book.... I’ve never seen anything like it,” Sam said. 

Dean watched as Bobby walked over, talking about the book with Sam but Dean… he didn’t much care about the book. He trusted Bobby and knew that what they had planned would work. Bobby was as much a professional as it got. 

No, what Dean was really interested in was speaking to Cas. He looked down at the other man, thinking it over before he nudged him to get his attention. “Hey, angel? Can I talk to you for a moment?” he asked as he pulled him gently toward the corner where they could talk alone. 

Castiel looked up from where he’d been watching Sam and Bobby talk. He wondered briefly what Dean wanted to talk about, but instead of wondering, he simply nodded, thinking he would find out. He let Dean pull him to the corner. “What? What is it?” he asked. 

Dean sucked in a breath, looking down into blue eyes. “How are you feeling?” he asked to start off with. He had never been good with this stuff but what he’d witnessed back at the house, with Castiel screaming that way and then again in the car… it was troubling him. It was weighing heavy on his own shoulders that something was going on with his boyfriend that he couldn’t fix so he wondered how heavily it was weighing on the man it was actually happening to.

Castiel frowned. He didn’t understand why Dean was particularly concerned with him at this moment. Why would Dean care how he was? They were down a man and they had to find him. And it wasn’t just any man, to top it off. It was their father. 

He looked into Dean’s beautiful green eyes and immediately… he saw worry behind them. He tipped his head a little, the thought confusing him; only bringing more questions. Why would Dean be worried about him? Was it because Sam said he was calling out in his sleep? What had he said?

Then, all at once, it hit him. 

Castiel sucked in a breath of his own and his arms crossed over his body as if showing that he was uncomfortable. But this was Dean. He knew that if he didn’t tell his boyfriend what was wrong, he would think the worst. And then he would be more angry that he didn’t just simply tell him. 

“You’re referring to what happened at the house… with the demon…” Castiel started. 

“No,” Dean began before he nodded. “And yes. Look… I don’t know what happened back there. I don’t know why… I just need for my boyfriend to tell me he’s okay if he is and the truth if he’s not,” the hunter whispered as he brought Cas’ knuckles to his lips and caressed them softly. 

Castiel’s eyes closed at the gentle gesture, loving the way his heart felt at it. He loved that Dean was this rough and tumble bad boy, but when it came to him… Dean was soft and gentle. He didn’t do anything that would hurt him too badly. He had expressed on multiple occasions that he never wanted to. 

When he opened his eyes back up, seeing green staring back at him as if waiting for him to unload a big secret or give him this big spiel… but he didn’t have one. So he went with the truth he knew. 

“I don’t know what happened,” he whispered, shaking his head. 

Dean nodded. “Alright, angel. Then let’s start off with what you remember.”

“I don’t know,” he repeated. He stepped closer and laced their fingers so that he could feel more contact, though he stared off as he let what happened replay in his head. “You told me to help Sam… so I went upstairs. When I got up there… I saw him,” he stuttered out. “I… it was like everything was slowed down, Dean,” he whispered. “It was like I was moving through jello as soon as I saw him. And he looked at Sam… and in the next moment he was looking at me with those yellow eyes.” His breathing picked up, going unnoticed by himself as he recalled what it had felt like for those yellow eyes to hit him. “I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t move, I could barely see correctly, and it was like my head was splitting open. I was confused a-and  _ immobilized _ . I didn’t know what was going on. I yelled for Sam to take the shot. It was like I knew him and I didn’t and nothing made sense. E-everything was hazy–”

Dean cupped his cheeks, shushing him a little as he’d started to babble and run on. “Hey, angel. It’s okay. It’s okay,” he assured softly. “Maybe you were just scared–”

“No,” he protested. “I wasn’t scared. That wasn’t what was happening.”

Dean swallowed. “Then, angel… why were you screaming?” he whispered. 

At that, Castiel stopped short and looked up into his eyes. “What? What are you talking about?”

“I didn’t think you remembered,” he sighed, eyeing Sam who, he’d noticed, had stopped to listen. “Cas… when I came upstairs…” he began but then went for a different approach. “I was going to stay down stairs with Monica’s husband. I was going to make sure he was safe because I trusted that you and Sam had it handled. But then… angel, I heard you screaming.”

Castiel blinked up at him, confused and not knowing what to think. He was screaming? He couldn’t remember doing something like that. He remembered yelling at Sam to take the shot, who had been frozen there by the look of the demon and his yellow eyes. He remembered feeling the pain in his head but he didn’t remember screaming. “W-what–”

“It was bloodcurdling, Cas. I ran upstairs as fast as I could because I thought you were hurt. When I got up there, you were clutching your head and screaming so loud that… I think neighbors heard. I had to pull you down the stairs because you saw the fire and you just stood there. And then on the way here you were screaming so loud it was like you were hitting friggin’ dog whistle territory. I didn’t know your voice went that high. And then you wake up and you don’t even remember or realize you were doing it? That in itself scares me,” Dean said as his brow furrowed. “Do you know how much it takes for me to be able to let you go out into what I do and trust you’ll come back to me? It’s scary… and now this– Cas we’ve been hunting for months, nearly… you’ve never reacted that way–”

“Because I wasn’t scared, Dean,” he said as he pulled away a little. “I… I don’t know what happened. I don’t know why it affected me…” he looked down. “It was like… I was at war with myself. An internal war… Like something inside me was trying to come through at the same time it was trying to be kept in…”

“Yeah… I know how that feels,” Sam said quietly. 

Dean pointed at Sam like he was suddenly turning on his brother. “Don’t say that. Cas isn’t like that,” he growled. 

Sam made a face. It was riddled with hurt and anger at the way Dean seemed to regard him like a freak. This was his brother. He was never supposed to think of him like that. “Like what? Like me, Dean? Because being like me is so bad. You talk to me like it’s some kind of disease. Cas didn’t  _ catch _ it. I’m saying that everyone has a backstory–”

“And his isn’t like ours–”

“Stop it!” Castiel yelled loud enough that everyone looked toward him. “We are not doing this right now. We have a job to do. We have someone to find. We do that. Then we can worry about my slip up,” he demanded. 

The room was quiet. Castiel could tell that Sam was hurting because of the way the man he looked up to treated him. Like he was some common thing they hunted. He could tell that Dean was hurting because it took everything for Dean, sometimes, to not think of his brother like a freak for the visions he had. But he still loved him. He knew Dean didn’t want to think of him that way either. 

Bobby cleared his throat. “Well, I’ll tell you something else, too,” he said, changing the subject back to what was at hand. “This is some serious crap you boys stepped in.”

The room remained quiet for a few more beats, Sam looking at his brother before he looked to Bobby. “Oh, yeah? How’s that?” he forced out. 

“Normal year, I hear of, say, three demonic possessions. Maybe four, tops,” he informed, a serious air about him. 

“Yeah?”

“This year I heard of 27 so far. You get what I’m saying? More and more demons are walking among us – a lot more.”

That seemed to get the tension between the three young men to dissipate. They were no longer worrying about their own problems and instead worrying about the fact that there was a phenomena happening that they needed to help get ahold of. It was their job. 

“Do you know why?” Sam questioned. 

The elder hunter shook his head. “No, but I know it’s something big. The storm’s coming, and I’d say all of you, your Daddy – you are smack in the middle of it,” Bobby said, looking to even Castiel. 

The three of them looked to each other, wondering what that could mean for them all. Castiel knew that Dean and Sam were in the middle of all of this because they were born into it when the demon picked their family. But he… he’d joined this cause unknowingly. And yet… he was ready to fight for it. 

Just then the dog that had been outside started barking with a vengeance, not something light. It sounded like a warning and like he was defending his territory. 

Bobby was up in a second. “Rumsfeld,” he said, though as he said it, the barking was cut off with a slight whine. 

“Dean,” Castiel whispered as Dean put Castiel behind him, sensing that something wasn’t right. He may not have been psychic like his brother but he knew when something wasn’t right in the air.

“Something’s wrong,” Bobby announced. But no sooner did he say it did the door burst open and the wood splintered away from the frame as someone kicked it open. 

The boys looked to the door to see who it was, unsurprised as they saw Meg saunter in like she owned the place– well what was left of it after she was done destroying it. She smirked a little as she stepped in like she was telling them they could run but to think they could hide from her was foolish. 

Dean reached into his picked for the flask of holy water that Bobby had given to him only a little bit beforehand. They planned for this. For this exact moment. It just had to go to plan. 

“No more crap, okay?” she asked. 

Dean, though, moved and stepped forward as he unscrewed the flask but just as he did, Meg flung her arm out and Dean went flying toward a stack of books. As soon a he hit, he looked to be knocked out and at that point… Castiel didn’t know if he really was or not. 

Castiel growled as Sam stood and put himself between them and Meg, blocking him just as he was going to go after him. “You bitch. I’ll skin you,” he threatened. 

Meg smirked, looking him up and down. “Kinky. I like,” she said as she advanced and Sam backed them up away from her. “Castiel, isn’t it? I admire all that chutzpah for your precious little boyfriend... But kitty doesn’t have his claws, does he?”

Castiel squinted at her for many reasons. The first being that she had hurt his boyfriend, the second being because he didn’t know what bothered him more: the fact that he didn’t have any weapons or the fact that she  _ knew _ he didn’t have any weapons.

Meg’s attention turned to Sam, though, as she seemed to be done with Castiel. “I want the colt, Sam,” she demanded. “The real colt. Right now.”

“We don’t have it on us. We buried it,” Sam tried as he continued to back them against the wall in the other room. 

“Didn’t I say ‘no more crap’?” she growled. “I swear – after everything I heard about you Winchesters, I got to tell you, I’m a little underwhelmed. First Johnny tries to pawn off a fake gun, and then he leaves the real gun with you two chuckleheads. Lackluster, man. I mean, did you really think I wouldn’t find you?”

Castiel smirked when he saw his boyfriend standing behind her and their plan had worked. But mostly, he was relieved to see that he was okay. 

“Actually,” Dean said, making her turn. “We were counting on it.” He looked up at the ceiling briefly which made her gaze follow his. The way the smirk wiped off her face at seeing the trap that had been set there was more than satisfying. “Gotcha,” he said with a smirk of his own. 

 

After tying Meg to a chair within the trap, the three boys situated themselves in the corner of the room as they waited for Bobby to give them the go ahead. They all watched her, making sure that if anything did go wrong, they would be ready. And then of course there was the part where her and her minions had stolen one of their own. There was a lot of hatred directed toward her. 

“You know, if you wanted to tie me up, all you had to do was ask,” she said in a tone that always seemed to be there, like she was perpetually looking to get laid. But Castiel was sure it was a front to mask that she was scared. 

Castiel also wasn’t a bit fan of the way Meg was staring at him, a smirk on her face. Where he was, Dean was sitting halfway on the desk that was right there, Sam leaning on the door frame. But Castiel was stood next to Dean with the hunter’s arm around his waist and his own arms resting on Dean’s shoulder. For some reason, the position seemed to amuse Meg. She seemed to smile when Castiel pressed against Dean. He didn’t much understand why… but he didn’t much want to know. 

Bobby came in then with a canister of salt, nodding to the boys. “I salted the door and windows. If there are any demons out there, they ain’t getting in,” he offered them. 

Dean nodded and slowly let go of Castiel, who moved accordingly, as he walked around Bobby and stood in front of her. He was quiet for only a moment as he debated holding back, not wanting Cas to see the darkness in him, the lengths he would go to for his family. But Castiel was part of that crazy family now. He had to do what he had to. 

“Where’s our father, Meg?” he asked calmly, thinking he would give her the chance to come clean right then and there. 

“You didn’t ask very nice.”

“Where’s our father, bitch?”

Meg gave a – fake– shocked expression. “Jeez. You kiss your mother with that mouth? Oh wait, I forgot, you don’t,” she smirked like she was enjoying this because… well she probably was.

But that didn’t stop Dean from going for her and getting in her face. She didn’t have a right to talk about his mother, not with what kind of vile creature she was. And now that she had his father? It was Dean she should fear.

“You think this is a fucking game?!” he yelled as he lunged for her. “Where is he? What did you do to him?”

“He died screaming,” she said immediately and without hesitation. “I killed him myself.”

Her smirk was enough to make the rage in Dean  _ truly  _ surface at that point. He and his father had their differences but he still loved him to the ends of the earth. He was his father. And John was the only parent he had left. So Meg’s smirk and words was all he needed to feel the hatred bubble for just a moment before he couldn’t contain it anymore. 

Dean’s lips quivered as he knew he couldn’t hold it in before he reeled back and backhanded her. He heard her cry out as her head whipped to the side from the force of it. For a split second, Dean was almost concerned. He’d just hit a girl, after all. But then he reminded himself that this thing– this  _ demon _ … it barely felt it.

Meg didn’t miss a beat as she flicked her hair back, gazing up at Dean with an unreadable look in her eye. “That’s kind of a turn on – you hitting a girl.”

“You’re no girl,” he countered. 

Bobby stood as he and Meg seemed to have a staring contest. “Dean,” he said, getting his attention, his tone telling him that he needed to speak to him. 

Castiel followed, moving closer to Dean as he came closer. “You okay?” he asked his boyfriend softly. He thought to reach for him, hold on to him, reassure him… be he knew that wasn’t what Dean needed right now.

He cast a look back at her. “She’s lying. He’s not dead,” he grunted. 

“Dean, you gotta be careful with her. Don’t hurt her,” he urged.

Dean wore a look of confusion, not understanding why Bobby would be protecting a demon. “Why?”

“Because she really is a girl, that’s why,” Bobby said as if that was all the explanation he needed.

It was Sam’s turn to look confused, though Castiel was just as. “What are you talking about?” Sam questioned. 

Bobby looked at them like it was the easiest puzzle to solve. “She’s possessed. That’s a human possessed by a demon. Can’t you tell?” he asked, thinking it obvious. 

Dean looked back at Meg. He took in the way she seemed to grip the chair, though her body was shaking; rocking back and forth. She looked at them like she was barely holding back from killing them all when the truth was she was so clearly scared of what was coming for her. 

“Are you trying to tell us there’s an innocent girl trapped somewhere in there?” Castiel asked, reading Dean’s question before he even asked. 

Bobby nodded, once again giving them a look as if they’d just stated the obvious because to him, they had. 

Dean glanced back at Meg once more and she only looked worse before he looked to Bobby once more, thinking it over. If she was possessed… they could send her back to hell. They could get rid of her and not have to worry about her. What was better… they could use it as leverage. 

He looked at Bobby. “That’s actually good news,” he said. 

It had taken some time but eventually, after looking through their father’s journal, they’d found an exorcism. They didn’t know what to expect, really. Demons had never really been in their business before. But this was a whole new can of worms. 

Castiel had been the one to volunteer to read the exorcism. They had to get it right and he’d always been good at languages in school. Pronunciation was key, wasn’t it?

As they approached Meg, book open, the demon smirked a little. “Are you gonna read me a story?” she asked, nonchalance in her voice but Castiel could tell there was something more.

“Something like that. Hit it, Cas,” he said. 

Castiel looked down at the book and began to read the Latin that was there. Latin was an extremely dead language so it wasn’t like that he was doing was easy. 

Meg looked from Castiel to Dean. “An exorcism? Are you serious?”

“Oh we’re going for it, baby – head spinning, projectile vomiting, the whole nine yards,” Dean said, his lips quirking as if daring Meg to say anything more because he had her by the proverbial balls. 

Meg smirked at Dean like what he was doing would do nothing to her before she seemed to wince in pain. So the exorcism was affecting her. 

When she flinched, Castiel paused, looking up at Dean and Sam as if wondering if he should continue. He watched as she looked over her shoulder slightly. 

“I’m gonna to kill you,” she muttered slowly. “I’m gonna rip the bones from your body–”

“No, you’re gonna burn in hell,” Dean growled. 

“Unless you tell us where our Dad is,” Sam continued.  

The three of them watched as the demon leeching off the girl's body smiled fleetingly but she didn’t speak. 

Dean was doing everything he could to keep in his rage, to not go Full Metal Jacket on the bitch that was possessing some poor, innocent, girl. “Well, at least you’ll get a nice tan,” he said before he looked back to Cas.

Castiel looked down and began reading again as he moved to stand by the other two, bringing himself next to Dean. Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Meg shaking and convulsing like someone was doing something to her but she was sat there, no one touching her. She looked to be in pain and finally, a grunt cut into his latin. 

“He begged for his life with tears in his eyes,” she said through clenched teeth. “He begged to see his sons one last time. That’s when I slit his throat.” She panted like she’d been running a marathon and that’s when the boys knew they had her as they all made brief eye contact. 

Castiel began to read again. 

Dean’s jaw couldn’t clench any harder as he leaned down to her. “For your sake, I hope you’re lying. Cause if it’s true, I swear to God, I will march into hell myself and I will slaughter each and every one of you evil sons of bitches, so help me God.

As Castiel continued to read, he was cut off after a moment when the pages on a nearby book began to move, a wind blowing in the room. He didn’t stay stuck for long, though, and soon he was reading again. 

The more he read, the more Meg twitched and showed signs of pain. If it wasn’t for the fact that this was just a shell– a host for the monster that took up root in the girl it was possessing, he might have actually felt bad. That being said, he didn’t; not stopping until she made another pained noise. 

“Where is he?” Dean asked, beginning to get angrier at the demon. 

“You just won’t take ‘dead’ for an answer, will you?” she panted. 

“Where is he?!” Sam yelled.

“Dead!” she yelled back. 

“No, he’s not! He’s not dead! He can’t be!” Dean shouted at her in an almost panicked tone, obviously upset. 

Castiel wanted to console his boyfriend because the more he read and the more Meg told them John was dead… the more he was inclined to believe it. She was clearly in pain and facing the aspect of going back to hell. Why would she lie at this point?

He could tell that Dean was thinking the same by the look in his eyes. He didn’t want to admit that his father might actually be dead. That was what he was facing and he would have rathered torture the creature inside the girl than admit what might have happened.

Dean felt eyes on him and when he did, he looked up at Cas. “What are you looking at? Keep reading,” he demanded. 

More Latin spewed from his mouth and he wondered just how much more of the incantation Meg could take. She looked beaten up and run down. Her whole body was shaking as her nails dug into the arm of the chair. It looked like she was hanging on by a thread. 

Suddenly the chair took a sharp leap toward him as Meg threw her head back and screamed. It only offset him for a second before he was back at it, watching as the chair scraped back and forth within the trap that was on the ceiling as she yelled. 

“He will be!” she shouted finally. 

Dean held his hand out for Cas to stop. “Wait! What?”

“He’s not dead. But he will be after what we do to him,” she said darkly. 

“How do we know you’re telling the truth?” Dean asked. 

“You don’t.”

“Cas– ”

“A building! Okay? A building in Jefferson City.”

“Missouri?” Where, where? An address!” Dean said, somewhere on the verge of frantic. 

“I don’t know,” she whispered. 

“And the demon – the one we’re looking for – where is it?” Sam asked. 

“I don’t know. I swear,” She panted, looking like she was just happy for the relief from the torture the incantation was causing her. “That’s everything. That’s all I know.”

It wasn’t much. Hell, it wasn’t anything, really. She could have been lying to stop the exorcism. John could have been dead already. They didn’t know. So how did they proceed? Did they take her at her words? Sam and Castiel both looked to Dean to make the final call. 

Dean was silent, though. The same things were running through his mind as well. He didn’t know whether to believe Meg and let her go, or do what he really wanted. He watched her pant and heave as she relaxed from the relief of them stopping. But as she looked up at him, the hatred came back and his lip curled. 

“Finish it,” he said as he looked away from her and walked around the chair.

“What?” Meg panicked. “I told you the truth!”

“I don’t care,” Dean informed, the tone in his voice telling that he truly didn’t. 

“You son of a bitch, you promised–”

Dean lunged at her once more. “I lied!” he shouted at her. 

Meg turned on Cas at that moment, her head tilting as she looked at him darkly and tried to save herself. “I have something of yours, you know. Something important. Something you love.”

Castiel squinted at her. “You’re lying. You don’t have anything I want. You don’t have anything I love.”

She smirked, though it was weak and clearly a last ditch effort. “Can you be sure? Without me you’ll never find it. Without me there to check in, they’ll break it in two.”

Dean’s eyes trailed up to see that his boyfriend was clearly confused at that time. He didn’t know what Meg was talking about but it didn’t stop him from being curious. What could she have of his that he wouldn’t know about?

Dean moved closer. “Cas. Finish it,” he said. 

Castiel hesitated when Dean told him to continue, to finish it… and send the demon where it belonged. He didn’t know why… she had to be lying. And yet he still felt like it was his duty to find out what it was…

“Dean–”

“She’s lying, Cas. She doesn’t have anything of yours. She’s trying to save her own ass. That’s all. She thinks she can prey on you because you’re new to this and she knows it. Don’t let her be right,” he said softly. “You’re stronger than that.”

“Dean,” Sam said, coming up closer. “We can still use her. Find out where the demon is–”

“She doesn’t know,” he shook his head. 

“She lied–” he tried again.

“Sam, there’s an innocent girl trapped somewhere in there. We’ve go to help her.”

Dean heard footsteps behind him, Bobby coming up to get in the middle of all of it. “You’re gonna kill her,” Bobby said. 

“What?” Dean asked as he turned around to face the other man. 

Bobby shook his head. “You said she fell from a building. That girl’s body is broken. The only thing keeping her alive is that demon inside. You exorcise it – that girl is going to die,” he said, looking at them as if Dean cared about that. 

But of course Dean did. Of course he cared that an innocent girl was going to die because of what happened. They were the ones that had thrown her from the building in the first place. But that was when they’d thought she was an insane woman trying to simply kill people. They didn’t know… they couldn’t have known. But now… there was someone trapped in there, probably begging to get out. They had to help her. Even if it meant killing her. 

“Listen to me, both of you, we are not gonna leave her like that–”

“She is a human being,” Bobby said as if he was still thinking Dean didn’t care. 

“And we’re gonna put her out of her misery,” He said with finality. “Cas,” he addressed, his boyfriend looking up at him with wide eyes for a second. “Finish it,” he requested, knowing that ultimately it was up to him. 

Castiel looked at all of them, looked at the three men that were looking back and then to Meg who was practically dead already. She looked beaten, broken, and that was as a demon. He would have been lying if he had said that this was black or white. That he knew exactly what to do. But the truth was this was so gray. He didn’t know what was right and wrong at this point. What was he to do?

Dean watched as Cas’ eyes found the others and he shook his head, not wanting Castiel to do something they’d all regret. “Angel,” he said softly, getting him to look at him. “Finish it. For everyone’s sake.”

Castiel swallowed and looked to Meg one more time as he tried to decide what to do, who to listen to. He closed his eyes for a moment before he took a breath. When he opened them again, he looked down at the journal… and kept reading. 

As soon as he started again, Meg began to groan again. She threw her head back as her whole body twitched and when she looked up, her eyes were completely black. She stared at Sam, Dean, and Bobby for a second before Castiel was finishing it and she threw her head back once more and she screamed, black smoke leaving her body. 

Now for Bobby, it was something he’d seen many times before. Sam and Dean had seen it a few times themselves. But for Cas? It was pure horror movie bullshit. Only it was real… and happening in front of them. 

He watched as the smoke ejected itself from the girl and blasted against the ceiling and the devil’s trap before it just dissipated all together and it was gone.

Their eyes immediately cast back down to Meg’s body. They watched as she didn’t move, blood beginning to drip from her mouth. They looked around at each other, figuring she was dead… until she began to try and lift her head. 

“She’s still alive,” Castiel breathed. 

Dean acted quickly, looking to Bobby. “Call 911. Get some water and blankets,” he shouted after the man.

As he rushed off, the three of them moved to untie the girl in the chair, knowing they needed to get her to somewhere more comfortable. 

“Thank you,” she whispered as best she could. 

“Shh, shh. Just take it easy, alright?” Castiel said softly back.  

“Come on. Let’s get her down,” Dean nodded. 

As they lifted her, the horrific sound of bones crunching as the moved her and her screaming was enough to make Castiel want to lose any food he’d eaten in the last twenty-four hours. He felt horrible as they set her down on the floor. 

“A year,” She breathed, her voice strained. 

“What?” Sam asked. 

“It’s been a year–”

“Shh, just take it easy,” Castiel tried. 

“I’ve been awake for some of it. I couldn’t move my own body. The things I did – it’s a nightmare,” she said, though she struggled to say it. 

“Was it telling us the truth about our Dad?” Dean asked suddenly. 

Castiel and Sam looked up. “Dean,” they chided in unison.

“We need to know,” he muttered back. 

“Yes. But it wants... you to know... that... they want you to come for him,” she whispered, nodding as best she could. 

“If Dad’s still alive, none of that matters.”

Bobby came in at that moment with blankets and a glass of water. They rushed to get her some water as they covered her, though as soon as the water was in her mouth, she was coughing it back up. 

“Where is the demon we’re looking for?” Sam asked after a moment. 

“Not there. Other ones. Awful ones,” she breathed. 

“Where are they keeping our Dad?” Dean asked. 

“By the river,” she whispered, her voice getting lower… fading. “Sunrise…”

“‘Sunrise’? What does that mean?” Dean asked as Meg stared at him. “What does that mean?”

It was only a beat later that Dean realized that this girl wasn’t just staring at him, she was dead. His face shifted as he realized, looking to his brother and then Cas as he clenched his jaw. He couldn’t help but feel like this was their fault. They were the ones that had the girl thrown off the building. They couldn’t have known. But still. It was hard. And he had a feeling that all of this? It wasn’t going to get any easier...

 


	8. Everything Comes to a Head

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end is nigh! Literally, this is the end of this long as chaptered bit of the series. There is going to be more. We are going to go into season two but this is where things might REALLY begin to change. I'm going to be putting my own spin on things and it's not going to go exactly like season two did! Excited!

It was a long ride. From South Dakota to Missouri wasn’t a short trip to begin with. But with Dean’s stoic face and no one talking, it made it even longer. 

Castiel wanted to say something. He wanted to talk to the brothers… but part of him couldn’t help but feel like it was both his right and not his place to. This was not his father that they had. This was not his fight. He’d inserted himself into it, yes… but he didn’t belong there. 

When they finally stopped, it was in a desolate part of the town near a bridge where no one would bother their car. Sam stood against the car, the book Bobby had given them on top of it as he flipped through the pages. 

Castiel watched Dean load guns and make sure all his weapons were in perfect condition. He sighed as he moved closer. “You’ve been quiet,” he said softly. 

Dean breathed in as he felt Castiel step closer. Usually the other’s presence was a thing of comfort and relaxation. But he was finding it hard to relax at a time like this. “Just getting ready,” he offered. 

Castiel looked down, wondering how he should approach his boyfriend. “You know… I’ve been thinking… this seems like a you and Sam fight, you know? It kinda has since we got the colt. I’ve just sorta been along for the ride. If you want me to… I’ll sit out.”

Normally, Dean would have pulled Castiel in, told him he needed him. He would have told him that he was part of their family and that talk like that didn’t need to happen. But Dean wasn’t exactly in the mindframe of romantic gestures. 

“I don’t care, Cas,” he muttered out, knowing it was dick-ish as soon as he said it. 

“What?” Castiel asked. 

“I said I don’t care,” he uttered a little louder. “Stay, go, I don’t give a rats ass. You do what you wanna.”

Castiel felt a pang of hurt at the way Dean snapped at him but he reminded himself that this wasn’t about him at this moment. It was about their father so he could let it go. He could look past it. 

“O-okay. I was just… trying to–”

“What the hell did I just say, Cas?” he growled as he looked up. “I don’t care what you do. Me and Sam have gotten into situations worse without you and we’ve come out fine. We don’t need you.”

_ Ouch _ . That one had stung. He didn’t know how Dean had meant it but no matter what way he looked at it, he felt like Dean had basically just told him to scram. Because he wasn’t needed. 

When Dean had said it, it hadn’t registered at first. He’d just meant that they wouldn’t be hurting if they were a man down. They could do it without him. But that wasn’t how he said it. He saw the way Castiel reacted and he opened his mouth to try and fix what he’s said but then Sam was there. 

Castiel felt Sam slip an arm around him and bring him into a sideways hug, pressing his cheek against the top of his head. “My brother is an asshole. ‘Course we need you there,” he said. “If not for the extra assist, for the moral support. That’s what he should have said,” Sam whispered, the last part only low enough for Cas to hear. 

Castiel gave a soft smile. “Thank you, Sam,” he said, though he didn’t look back at Dean. Not yet. 

Sam gave a small smile back, seeing the way Dean gave him a death glare. Cas was still his boyfriend, after all. And Sam stepping in like that never ceased to piss him off. 

Sam didn’t pay any attention to his brother’s gaze as he stepped up to the open trunk of the impala. He cleared off a patch of dust before beginning to draw something on the car. 

Dean finally looked down and when he noticed Sam using something to write on his Baby, he flipped. “Dude, the fuck you drawing on my car?” he growled. 

“It’s called a devil’s trap,” he answered as he kept drawing, Dean’s words not affecting him. “Demon’s can’t get through it or inside it.”

“So?” Dean asked as Sam moved to the other side of the car and he pressed a finger into the markings, wondering if they were going to come off or leave lasting damage on his car. 

“It basically turns the trunk into a lock box.”

“So?” he asked again. 

Sam sighed. “ _ So _ , we have a place to hide the colt while we go get Dad.”

Dean frowned. “What are you talking about?” Dean asked as if Sam was crazy. “We’re bringing the colt with us.”

“We can’t, Dean. We’ve only got three bullets left. We can’t just use them on any demon, we’ve got to use them on  _ the _ demon.”

“No, we have to save Dad, Sam, okay? We’re gonna need all the help we can get,” Dean said as he came closer to his brother, trying to get Sam to see that it was a bad idea to leave the colt behind when it was their only weapon against demons. They weren’t going to line up to be exorcised.

“Dean, you know how pissed Dad would be if we used all the bullets?” Sam asked as he closed the book he’d been using to draw the symbols. “Dean, he wouldn’t want us to bring the gun–”

“I don’t care, Sam. I don’t care what Dad wants, okay?” he said as he began to get loud. “And since when do you care what Dad wants?”

“We want to kill this demon,” he rebutted, getting just as loud as Dean. “You used to want that, too. Hell, I mean, you’re the one who came and got me at school! You’re the one who dragged me back into this, Dean. I’m just trying to finish it!” 

There was a paused and Castiel sighed as he walked away from their arguing a bit. He didn’t want to be in the middle of it and he didn’t want to get involved. Usually this was the part where they would ask him. They would come to him and have him be the deciding vote. But as nice as Sam was being and as much of a jerk Dean was… this was about them and their family. 

“Well, you and Dad are a lot more alike than I thought, you know that? You both can’t wait to sacrifice yourself for this thing. But you know what? I’m gonna be the one to bury you. You’re selfish, you know that? You don’t care about anything but revenge.”

Sam, in turn, gave Dean a good bitch face. “That’s not true, Dean,” he began, rolling his eyes when Dean scoffed. “I want Dad back. But they are expecting us to bring this gun. They get the gun, they will kill us all. That Colt is our only leverage and you know it, Dean. We can not bring that gun. We can’t.”

“Fine.”

“I’m serious, Dean–”

“I said fine, Sam,” he said back. 

Dean made eye contact with his brother as he took the gun out of his leather pocket. He showed him the colt before he put it in the trunk and then gave him a look as if to say ‘there, happy?’. 

Before long they were on their way, walking along the water. They had figured since Meg had mentioned it, they would start there and try to look for signs of demons along the way. It was a long shot but it was all they had. 

They had been about to cut through a small bit of bushes when Dean paused, seeing a word that made him stop in his tracks. “Hey,” he said as he got their attention, getting them to stop as well. “Think I know what Meg meant by Sunrise.”

Sam and Cas looked over, following Dean’s line of sight to see an apartment building with a sign out front that says “Sunrise Apartments”.

Dean stepped forward as he processed, watching kids play outside. “Son of a bitch,” he muttered before he turned back to the other two. “That’s pretty smart. I mean, if these demons can possess people they can possess almost anybody inside.

Sam nodded as he realized his brother was right. “Yeah, and make anybody attack us.”

“And so we can’t kill them – a building full of human shields,” Castiel followed up. 

“They probably know exactly what we look like, too. And they could look like anybody,” Sam said as he gave a bit of a shrug. 

Dean looked around, looking for another way besides what he was seeing. “Yeah, this sucks out loud,” he muttered. 

“Tell me about it. Alright, so, how the hell are we going to get in?” Sam questioned. 

Castiel stayed quiet for a moment as they watched the building. All of them stood there as they debated, going over in their own heads what it is they could do to get in and not get anyone hurt. Because as hunters… that was the last thing they wanted. 

Castiel sighed. “Pull the fire alarm, get out all the civilians?” he suggested. 

The brothers seemed to turn it over in their heads for a moment, weighing if they had any better plans. “Okay, but then the city responds in, what, seven minutes?” Sam asked. 

“Seven minutes exactly,” Dean nodded. 

It was Sam that volunteered to go. Dean and Castiel stood back in the bushes as they watched Sam cross the street and go into the apartment building. 

Usually, this was the time the two at least  _ spoke _ to each other. One would ask the other how he was doing or if he was okay. Sometimes they would only need physical contact so they knew they were there for each other. But now? The tension was pregnant and palpable. It could have been cut with a butter knife… and still they remained quiet. Saying nothing to each other. 

When the fire department arrived, they had their plan ready as Dean and Castiel went up to a fireman that was standing by the trucks. “Hey, what’s happening?” Dean asked as they approached. 

“We’re figuring that out right now, sirs. Just stay back,” the fireman urged as he moved them back.

“Oh but we have a Yorkie upstairs, our baby, and he pees when he’s nervous…” Castiel said, putting on the worried face that he so  _ hadn’t _ practiced in the mirror.

“Gentlemen, you have to stay back,” he said. 

They kept the city worker preoccupied until Sam gave them the signal from behind the truck. It didn’t take them long to put on the fireman getups and work their way into the apartments as one of the groups the officials were already sending into floors. 

They rounded a corner, Dean’s home made EMF detector in his hand. They walked around checking the doors of the aparments for any sign that something was there that wasn’t human. 

“Always wanted to be a fireman when I grew up,” Dean said offhandedly. 

“You never told me that,” Sam remarked as the EMF began to buzz and flicker back and forth, telling them that  _ something _ was on the other side of the door. 

The three eyed each other with trepidation before Dean knocked on the door. They waited a moment and when Dean got no answer, they knocked again. 

“This is the fire department!” he called. “We need you to evacuate.”

They waited until they heard the click of the chain being let go and for the knob to turn before they burst into the apartment. Sam lead the way, squirting one with the hose filled with holy water that had been Dean’s idea. While Sam did that, Dean sprayed the other into a corner with his own. 

As soon as the water stop, Castiel delivered a punch to the man to try and subdue him as Dean opened the closet door and Castiel pushed him through. Dean closed the door and held it as Sam carried over a screaming and kicking woman before they threw her in too, Dean and Castiel standing there to keep the door shut. 

As Sam got the salt, they held the door the best they could as the demons tried to beat it down with all their might. “Hurry up! Hurry up!” Dean urged, not sure how much longer they could keep the demons at bay, not with their strength. 

Sam was soon finished sprinkling the salt at their feet and when the line was finished, the banging stopped. 

Dean breathed as they stepped away from the half circle, beginning to take off the heave gear they were in. They made quick work of it before Dean was rushing them onward and into a room, Castiel following close behind. 

When they pushed the door open, the sight they saw was nothing Castiel would have wished on his worst enemies. There was the father of Sam and Dean Winchester, just spread out and bloody on a mattress. He was tied, looking like he’d been there for so long when really, he’d been with them just a day ago. 

“Dad?” Dean’s voice trembled as he stepped forward to where the almost lifeless body of their father laid. 

Castiel and Sam stood frozen there in the doorway as they waited for Dean to tell them something, watching as he leaned down to his father’s nose and mouth. 

“He’s still breathing,” he announced. 

Both of them breathed a sigh of pure relief at that. Castiel moved a little closer as if to offer help or something, but at that point… Sam seemed to have stopped listening, his eyes cast to a closet door. 

“Dad, wake up!” Dean said as he began shaking his father. “Dad!” he shouted.

Castiel watched as Dean shook him before he pulled out his pocket knife. “Dean, wait– wait,” he said as he put his hand out. 

“What? Why?” he asked. 

“He could be possessed for all we know.”

“Are you nuts?” Dean asked, shaking his head as he was about to look to Sam… but the other seemed to be off in his own world, looking toward the closet, seeming to drift closer to it. 

He was about to ask what the other was doing when Castiel took holy water of of his bag. “We have to be sure, Dean,” he said. He uncapped the flask and slowly began to sprinkle some of the water on to John. He watched as it had no effect on the man before John began to wake. 

John made noises, opening his eyes to see Dean and Cas. “Boys?” he whispered in a raspy voice. “Why you splashing water on me?” 

“Dad, are you okay?” Dean asked. 

“They’ve been drugging me. Where’s the colt?”

“Don’t worry, John. It’s safe,” Castiel nodded. 

“Good boys… good boys,” he muttered as Dean cut him free, Castiel trying to help. 

Dean looked over to see Sam looking toward the closet again and his jaw clenched. “Hey you maybe wanna help get our father free?” he growled. 

But Sam couldn’t hear him. He didn’t know how to describe it. He didn’t know how to relay the fact that he knew something else was there. Maybe it was the demon because at the moment… his head was splitting like it did when he got close to the thing, like when he got a vision. 

“Sam!” Dean tried again. 

Sam swallowed hard as his hand went toward the knob of the closet door. He had to know. He had to know what was inside it. Was he crazy? Making it up in his mind? Or was something behind that door? Someone? He couldn’t know. Not until he opened it. 

He felt something uneasy in his stomach and his heart as he put his hand around the doorknob and began to twist it. He didn’t know what would be on the other side of the door but he was prepared to face it head on. 

He knew there was no time like the present as he swung the door open. He’d expected an attack of some sort but instead he found himself looking down to a figure cowering in the back of the closet as the sunlight pooled in. 

As soon as his eyes laid on him, he knew who he was. He knew instantly that this was the man he’d been seeing. It was the man from his visions that he’d seen hurt in so many different ways. Too many different ways. 

He hadn’t changed much from his visions. He was still in the same clothing that was caked in blood and his hair was matted with sweat as well as blood. He was beaten and broken in more ways than one and it hit him hard. 

He dropped his bag as he fell to his knees. “I-it’s okay. Hey, it’s okay. We aren’t going to hurt you. We’re not demons, okay? We’re here to help you. We’re going to get you out of here.”

The man cowered back further, so much so that he couldn’t really be seen in the dark but Sam knew he was looking right at him. As he peered in closer, he could see the duct tape around his mouth that was keeping him quiet. 

His heart broke for the man. He didn’t know what this was truly about. He didn’t know what the demons wanted with him. He didn’t know if this man could ever go back to a normal life. But he could at least give him his freedom. They could at least help him. 

“I’m going to take that off, okay?” he asked softly as he reached in slowly so that he could see he wasn’t going to hurt him. 

Castiel and Dean made eye contact, wondering what the hell Sam was doing and who he was talking to. At the angle they were at, and Sam’s wide frame blocking the way, all they could see was Sam. For all they knew, he was talking to himself. Having some sort of stress induced hallucination. It wasn’t until they heard a voice did they know Sam was actually talking to a real person. 

The tape ripping off his mouth stung but it hurt nothing like the pain he had endured for the past few weeks. He didn’t feel much of anything anymore except for when they wanted to get really creative. When the tape was off, he looked at the tall man with the shaggy hair. He had kind eyes… but so had the demon before she ripped into him. 

“Is this the part where you shove a more creative gag down my throat?” he asked. 

Sam frowned. “What? No. Of course not. We’re here to help, like I said. Come on. Let’s get you up and out of here,” he said. 

Sam reached out and helped the small man up, smiling down at him a little as he untied him. “My name is Sam,” he said as he stepped aside. 

“I-I’m–”

“Gabriel?” came a soft whisper, a sob following. Confusion and hurt set in as he looked to his brother. 

Gabriel looked up to see his brother nearly drop the man that he was holding upward, another taking the weight as Castiel came forward. 

“You know him?” the brothers asked together, wondering where they’d heard Castiel mention the name before because both were sure they’d heard it. 

Tears filled his eyes as he took in what had been done to his older brother. He wondered how Gabriel had gotten caught up in things like this. How had he found his way to demons? How had any of this happened? Why? Why would they pick Gabriel out of all of his family? How long had he been there? So many questions were going through his head. 

What Castiel didn’t know was that some of the same were going through his brothers head. He didn’t understand why Castiel was involved in a world like this. He didn’t know how it could have happened and he had so many questions. 

But all could be saved. Nothing seemed more important as they wrapped their arms around each other tightly, Castiel sobbing. Both of them were overwhelmed with emotions that a hug was all they could muster. “Gabe…”

“I didn’t think I would see you again, Cassie,” he whispered. “Certainly didn’t think you would be saving my ass. It’s supposed to be my job to save yours.”

Castiel barked out a sad laugh. “How did you get in all of this?” he asked. 

“I was looking for you.”

Dean clenched his jaw. He didn’t know who this mystery man was, the man that was hugging his boyfriend. “Who the hell are you?” he asked. 

“Dean… it’s okay,” he whispered as he pulled back and cupped Gabriel’s cheeks affectionately. “He’s my brother…” he breathed out. 

Dean and Sam looked at each other, as if about to react when the sound of someone kicking in the front door could be heard. Their eyes widened and Sam reacted quickly, immediately moving to close the door before the, what he presumed was, demons could get in. He locked the door but no sooner did he have it closed was an axe coming through the wood. 

Castiel reached, throwing Sam the canister of salt as they moved to get John and Gabriel out the window and down the fire escape. 

Everything sort of passed by in a blur but before they really knew it, the five of them were climbing off the fire escape. While Dean helped his father, Castiel tried not to wonder why Sam had somewhat of a protective grip around his brother. So instead, he moved forward and past a truck to see what was going on when he was suddenly tackled to the ground. 

He groaned at the feeling as he felt his body impact, his skin rubbing raw as he scraped on the cement. He barely knew what was going on and what was happening. He was being tackled? By who?

Castiel didn’t really get the chance to think too much on it before he was being punched square in the face– and hard. It moved to stop it but the man, who he was sure was a demon, reeled back and punched him again. 

“Cas!” He heard Dean yell. 

He could hear footsteps coming up to them and he knew it was Dean. His boyfriend, always trying to be his knight in shining armor even when they weren’t speaking. 

His eyes were cracked as he watched Dean deliver a swift kick to the man… but he was unfazed as he looked at Dean with black eyes. All the demon did was flick his head to the side and Dean went flying. 

“Dean!” Castiel felt before he felt more punches. 

When Dean landed on the window, it took him only a moment to get his wits about him. He looked over to see the demon reeling back to punch Castiel again and again and he knew he had to do something. He went for his pocket where he held something he wasn’t supposed to have, something that he knew he had to bring.

The pain, for Castiel, was indescribable. The power behind the punches was strong and more than he knew what to do with. He could feel it knocking his skull around as well as chattering his teeth. He could feel him slipping closer to unconsciousness and he couldn’t seem to fight the demon off. There was no fight in him. He felt like this was it, like the demon was going to beat him to death.  

And then there was a gunshot. 

Dean watched as the bullet went in one side of the demons temple and out the other. It was a clean shot and he watched as the demon lit up beneath his skin, like lightning was hitting him, before he fell off Castiel. When he landed on the ground, blood poured out of his head immediately, Dean stood there to make sure the thing that was beating his boyfriend was really dead. 

Castiel didn’t know what was going on. He was laying there, feeling the blood dripping from his nose and swirling into his mouth. And then suddenly he was upright, feeling Dean’s hands as he asked him if he was okay. 

His eyes cracked, he could see the desperation in Dean’s own eyes and he moved his hand to cup his cheek. “I’m okay. Tougher than I look,” he offered. 

Dean looked into his eyes, looking relieved. No matter how they fought or how big of an ass he was to the other… he didn’t want to hurt him. He didn’t want Castiel to be hurt. He was discovering that he didn’t know if he could live without Cas and while that scared him beyond belief, he knew he couldn’t lose Cas. Not for anything. 

Sirens could be heard somewhere in the city and it seemed to jumpstart Dean. He didn’t know who they were for, what they were for… but sticking around the victim with a gunshot wound in his head, the literal smoking gun in his pocket… Dean wasn’t a fan of sticking around. 

“Come on,” he said to Cas. “We gotta go.”

 

Sam stood by a windowsill, pouring salt over everything so that nothing and no one could get in. He was thinking about everything, really. How his father was back and actually okay… how he’d seen visions that couldn’t bring them to the man that he needed to help but a demon could. And also how they had Castiel’s brother. Why did they have him?

All kinds of thoughts were swirling through his head before he heard Dean walking out of the back where the rooms were. 

He looked up. “How are they?” he asked. 

Dean sucked in a breath as he weighed how to answer that. “Dad needs some time to rest… Cas is trying to get Gabriel to do the same. It should have clicked as soon as I heard the name. Cas has told me about him so many times,” he offered with a shrug as he moved to sit on the top of a table. “They’ll be okay. Eventually.”

Sam nodded silently. He paused before he looked up at Dean as he turned. “Hey, you don’t think we were followed here, do you?”

Dean looked up as he thought about it. “I don’t know. I don’t think so. I mean, we couldn’t have found a more out-of-the-way place to hole up.”

Sam nodded once more before he heard a sound and they both looked up to see Castiel standing in the threshold. 

Castiel watched as Dean stood at seeing his boyfriend. Both brothers felt a little uncomfortable at seeing someone they cared for so deeply… beaten and bruised. But they held it in as best they could… even though Castiel could still see it.

He smiled a bit, the pain worth it. “I’m okay, guys,” he said. “Really.”

“You’re not okay, Cas,” Dean breathed as he reached for his face gently. 

Castiel caught his hand and held it there to him. “Yeah. I am. It’s gonna sting for a few days but it’s fine,” he shook his head before he reached for Dean in return. He thought about it a moment before he pulled him in for a soft kiss. 

Dean’s eyebrows jumped at the feeling, though he settled into it, kissing him back just as tender and gentle. His hands on his boyfriend's hips allowed him to bring Cas closer and truly feel him like he needed.   

When Castiel pulled away, he looked up at Dean. “You saved my life back there.”

“What? Nah–”

“You really did,” Sam followed. 

“So, I guess you’re glad I brought the gun, huh?” Dean asked with an almost playful smirk. 

“I’m trying to thank you,” Castiel said as he laid his hand on his chest. 

Dean looked back down at Cas. “You’re welcome… but of course I would save you. No matter what it took I would have saved you. You mean too much to me,” he informed as he kissed his crown. 

Castiel watched Dean cast his eyes down, clearly thinking about something he didn’t want them to know about but when it came to Cas, he could read Dean like a book. He couldn’t keep much from him. And he definitely couldn’t keep what was going on behind his eyes from him. 

“What is it, Dean?” he asked. 

The hunter looked up at his lover… debating on what to say. Did he tell Cas and Sam the truth? Or did he let it go? Did he let it sit on the inside. But it was probably too late for that. Cas figured out something was wrong. That was all he needed. 

It took him a while, his eyes still looking away like he was looking at something but there was nothing there. “You know that guy I shot?” he asked finally, his voice quiet. “There was a person in there.”

“You didn’t have a choice, Dean,” Sam offered. 

“Yeah, I know, that’s not what bothers me.”

“Then what does, baby?” Castiel asked softly. 

Killing that guy, killing Meg. I didn’t hesitate, I didn’t even flinch. For you guys or Dad, the things I’m willing to do or kill, it’s just, uh .... it scares me sometimes.”

“It shouldn’t,” came a voice as John stepped out of the dark. “You did good.”

Dean noticed the smile on his father's face despite the fact that the man had just been drugged and held by demons. Not to mention, Dean had his arms wrapped around Cas in a very intimate way. 

He cleared his throat as they separated a little. “You’re not mad?” he asked. 

“For what?” John countered. 

Dean looked at his father like it was obvious. “Using a bullet.”

“Mad? I’m proud of you. You know, Sam and I, we can get pretty obsessed. But you – you watch out for this family. You always have. No matter who’s in it,” he smiled softly at Cas. 

Castiel watched John a little closely. Had John Winchester just smiled at him? Tipped his proverbial hat at him like he was accepting him as a part of their family? Since when did John Winchester regard him as anything other than a threat to his family?

Dean seemed to catch it too. He wondered why. Had John been able to think while on the brink of drugged to death that he’d been able to see that Castiel made him so happy it was a travesty they hadn’t met sooner? Or perhaps John had just come to accept Castiel? He didn’t know… but it made him happy. 

“Thanks,” he said softly. 

At that moment, the wind seemed to pick up and the lights flickered. It caught all of their attention as they looked up and around, not knowing what was going on. John started to the window, the other three following. 

“It found us. It’s here,” John said as he peered out, looking all around as if looking for something.

“The demon?” Castiel asked. 

“Sam, lines of salt in front of every window, every door.

“I already did it–”

“Well, check it, okay?”

“Okay,” Sam said before he was off. 

John turned to Dean then. “Dean, you got the gun?” he asked. 

Dean nodded. “Yeah,” he said, his mind already gearing up for a fight. 

“Give it to me,” John demanded. 

Dean nodded again and went for the gun that he was keeping at his back, in his belt. “Dad, Sam tried to shoot the demon in Salvation. It disappeared.”

“This is me. I won’t miss. Now, the gun, hurry,” John said as he held his hand out for the gun. 

As soon as Dean had the gun out and in his hand, he hesitated as he looked down at the gun, piecing everything together. He looked over at his boyfriend, who was giving him an odd look. Dean looked down at the gun again and thought about how many bullets were left and his father’s assurance that he wouldn’t miss. He didn’t even seem to care about the fact that the demon had vanished before. Usually John did… he always cared about every fact. 

“Son, please,” John said.

Dean looked at his father as he took Castiel’s wrist in his hand and backed them up and away from John. 

“Dean?” Castiel questioned, wondering what his boyfriend was doing and what was wrong.

“Give me the gun. What are you doing, Dean?” John asked, raising his voice a little at his son.

“He’d be furious,” Dean said in a low voice. 

John looked at him like he was crazy. “What?”

“That I wasted a bullet and that I did it saving what he’d call ‘my fairy boyfriend.’ He wouldn’t be proud of me, he wouldn’t be nice to Cas... he’d tear me a new one and yell at Cas for being there,” he pointed out as he watched the man in front of him. Whatever it was sure was wearing his father but this was not his father. He held the gun up as the man looked at him like he was psycho before he cocked it. “You’re not my dad.”

Castiel’s eyebrows jumped but he remained behind Dean, looking at John as if asking what he was seeing that he he hadn’t. 

John took a step forward. “Dean, it’s me,” he insisted. 

“I know my Dad better than anyone. And you ain’t him–”

“What the hell’s gotten into you?”

“I could ask you the same thing. Stay back,” he said as Sam came back into the room. 

When Sam entered the room, the last thing he expected to see was his brothers holding his father at gunpoint. Cas, maybe. He and John didn’t much get along. But Dean? Dean would have never unless he had a really good reason. 

“Dean? What the hell’s going on?” he queried. 

“Your brother’s lost his mind,” John informed. 

“He’s not Dad.”

“What?” Sam asked. 

“I think he’s possessed. I think he’s been possessed since we rescued him,” he said, clearly upset as he told his brother what was on his mind. 

“Don’t listen to him, Sammy,” John tried. 

Castiel squinted at John and it was suddenly like he could see it too. John had been a little different with them. Almost too nice. Too soft, too much of what he wasn’t. It was beginning to ad up in his mind as well. 

“Dean, how do you know?” Sam looked at his father and wondered if Dean was right. Was his father possessed? What about the holy water he’d splashed him with? It had had no effect on him? Or was that before he got possessed? There was a moment they didn’t have eyes on him…

“He’s ... he’s different,” Dean said as if that was all the explanation he needed. 

John, or whatever was possessing him, had the nerve to look exasperated and put out by the circumstances. “You know, we don’t have time for this. Sam, you wanna kill this demon, you’ve gotta trust me.”

Sam looked back and forth between the two men he always trusted no matter what and the man he always believed in, even when he knew he was being fed bullshit. He didn’t know what to believe. He didn’t know if he should side with his brothers or if he should believe his father. He put everything into perspective in his mind and thought about how Dean wouldn’t do this lightly or on a whim. He had to be pretty damn convinced. 

John looked to his youngest son as if asking him what he would choose and if it would be the right decision. “Sam?”

At first, Sam said nothing before he shook his head. “No… No,” he muttered as he moved to stand behind his brother, to stand with his brothers on this. Because he knew that there was no reason for Dean to his brother. 

John nodded, a sense of betrayal on his face as he looked back and forth between them. “Fine. You’re both so sure, go ahead. Kill me,” he urged as he looked down, hanging his head.

There was silence as Dean held the gun out. He didn’t shoot, of course he didn’t. He  _ couldn’t _ . And really, neither Sam nor Cas blamed him. This was John, this was their father. They didn’t expect Dean to be able to pull the trigger on his own father

John gave a grin. “I thought so,” he mumbled before he looked back up, his eyes yellow.    
He looks back up and his eyes are yellow.

As soon as the yellow was visible to the three of them, Sam moved to lunge for the man but right as he did, he was thrown against the wall with a grunt. 

Castiel and Dean followed, being pushed against the wall by whatever hell powers the demon was using. Unfortunately, when they flew against the wall, the colt fell from Dean’s hand, leaving it at the feet of the demon they’d been chasing for years. 

The demon picked the colt up as the boys grunted out in sheer pain of being held against the wall by the force. “What a pain in the ass this thing’s been,” the demon said minutely.

“It’s you, isn’t it?” Sam asked as his father looked at him with yellow eyes. His lip quivered in anger as it brought back the fact that this  _ thing _ had killed his mother… had killed the woman he loved. This thing had ruined their lives. “We’ve been looking for you for a long time.”

“Well, you found me,” the demon said with an arrogant smirk that the boys wanted nothing more than to wipe off. 

“But the holy water–” Castiel stared

“You think something like that works on something like me?” it asked as he looked to Castiel with a smirk on his face. It moved closer like it was interested in Castiel for a moment. 

Castiel tried not to feel exactly like he had in Salvation. From the moment he’d seen the yellow eyes on him once more, his body tried to fight it like it was some kind of toxin. His mind wanted to go hazy, his vision blurry. It was taking everything he had not to feel the pain that was blooming in his head but he fought it tooth and nail. 

Sam felt a growl from himself. “I’m gonna kill you!” he said, getting the demon’s attention back on him. 

“Oh, that’d be a neat trick,” he said, the same smug air about him that Meg had wore. Of course that was before they sent her back to hell. “In fact, here. Make the gun float to you there, psychic boy,” he grinned as he put the gun on the table, knowing full well that whatever Sam could and couldn’t do, it was not something he could access. Not something he could turn on and off. 

That being said, Sam still looked at the gun, hoping he could make it do something. But nothing happened. 

The boys watched as the demon walked over to the window. “Well, this is fun. I could’ve killed you a hundred times today, but this... this is worth the wait,” he said in a content way, a way that made their skin crawl. 

Dean and Cas both struggled against the wall, dying to get away from it. Dying to do something other than remain motionless.

“Your Dad – he’s in here with me. Trapped inside his own meat suit. He says “hi”, by the way. He’s gonna tear you apart. He’s gonna taste the iron in your blood.”

“Let him go, or I swear to God–”

“What? What are you and God gonna do? You see, as far as I’m concerned, this is justice,” he said as he came closer to Dean, closer than he truly wanted. “You know that little exorcism of yours? That was my daughter.”

The hunter gave a look of confusion “Who, Meg?”

“The one in the alley?” the demon continued. “That was my boy. You understand?”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“What? You’re the only one that can have a family? You destroyed my children. How would you feel if I killed your family?” he asked before a slow smile grew on his face. “Oh, that’s right. I forgot. I did. Still, two wrongs don’t make a right.”

“You son of a bitch,” Castiel said for Dean.

“I wanna know why. Why’d you do it?” Sam demanded.   
  
“You mean why did I kill Mommy and pretty, little Jess?” the yellow eyed creature asked as he looked to Sam. 

“Yeah.”

“You know, I never told you this, but Sam was going to ask her to marry him,” he said to Dean as he moved backwards toward Sam. “Been shopping for rings and everything.” He turned to Sam, giving him a look that disgusted Sam. “You want to know why? Because they got in the way.”

“In the way of what?” Sam asked through clenched teeth. 

“My plans for you, Sammy. You... and all the children like you,” he let on. 

That piqued everyone’s interest at that point. Because Castiel had been told the story. That Sam wasn’t the only one that had suffered the way he did; losing his mother in his nursery. And he knew that he wasn’t the only kid with special abilities that had happened to. But what did the demon want with that? What did he want with kids that just happened to win the genetics lottery and get gifted with visions and telekinesis? How did he even know?

When he looked over, he could tell that the other two were thinking the same thing. They didn’t know what this  _ thing _ wanted with Sam or children like him. But knowing that there was more out there and that the demon had plans for them? It was disconcerting. 

“Listen, you mind just getting this over with, huh? Cause I really can’t stand the monologuing,” Dean said, trying to get the demon away from his brother or distract him. He expected more back and forth. What he hadn’t expected was for the words coming from him to piss the demon off immeasurably. 

The demon smirked. “Funny, but that’s all part of your M.O., isn’t it?” The demon asked as he turned around and suddenly Cas’ body started to move up the wall as the demon moved back to Dean. “Masks all that nasty pain, masks the truth,” he said, clearly getting a kick out of it as Dean watched Cas get further and further away from him. 

“Dean!” he called. 

“Cas!” he called back. “What– what are you doing?” Dean panicked. “You let him go,” he growled. 

Sam’s heart sped up as he watched Castiel go up to the ceiling the same way Monica had and the same way, he assumed, his mother had… and Jess. Was this truly happening? Was the demon going to kill Cas the way he killed everyone they loved? He remembered saying to Dean once that they could be cursed. That the same fate that had happened to Jess and Mary… it could happen to Cas. But after learning what they had. He never imagined it would be true. 

Castiel grunted in pain as his head hit the ceiling and he traveled across it just so. He was scared. Beyond belief, he was scared. But he wouldn’t give the demon the satisfaction. He wouldn’t give him the glory of screaming like everyone else did, he was sure. 

“Real quiet now, ain’t ya, boy?” the demon smirked. “You know… your father hates him,” he pointed. “He wishes that he never came into your life. Turned his boy into a little love sick fairy. Thinks you don’t even know how to do your job now,” he said as he seemed to get closer. “Your Daddy wishes that he would just die already.”

Dean’s jaw clenched and he fought against the demons hold. “If you hurt him, I’ll kill you–”

“Well now who are you talking about, Dean? Who do you care about more? The boy trapped to the ceiling that I’m going to gut and burn like I’ve done to every man of this family? Or will you choose Daddy?” it smirked, enjoying the game it was playing with Dean. 

Dean felt tears as he looked up to see Cas above his head, just splayed out on the ceiling. “It’s going to be okay, angel. Don’t worry,” he tried to say as reassuringly as possible. 

“Don’t lie to the boy now, Dean.”

“Why? Why are you doing this?” Dean asked, tears falling from his eyes. “I’m the one who hunted you! My family! Why are you doing this to him?”

The demon masked as his father smirked. “Poetic justice,” he said. “Because, you see, I burned Mommy for a reason. Jess too. They got in my way. You got in my way,” he said. “So now you’re going to face exactly what they did. You’ll lose what you love too.”

Castiel let out a scream as he felt something like a blade cut at his stomach. It was slow and painful and tears burst to his eyes. He wanted to kick and fight it, move away from it. But as the hellish force pinned him there, he had nowhere to go. 

“Cas!” Sam and Dean screamed at the same time. 

“No!” Sam yelled as he fought against the hold. “Stop this!”

“Please. I’m begging you. Please!” Dean yelled, ugly tears in his eyes. 

“Dean,” Castiel said, feeling his shirt soak in blood. 

“Stop!” Dean screamed. “Stop! Take me! Hurt me! Please! Leave him alone!” Dean begged. 

He didn’t know how he was supposed to live with himself if he lost Cas when it wasn’t his fight. He didn’t know how he would cope if he came out of this and Cas didn’t. He had to try anything he could. Even if it meant sacrificing himself. 

The demon smirked before Dean let out a scream. “Well if you insist.”

“Dean!” Sam called this time, watching as blood began to come from his brothers chest like something had ripped him open. He looked up at Cas and then back at Dean and he didn’t even know where to go at this point as he fought the force once more. He was going to lose everyone in that room. 

The civilian turned hunter had a feeling this was it. He had a feeling that this was where he got off. This was his stop and he wasn’t going anywhere else. He was going to die. Pinned to the ceiling like everyone else that loved a Winchester. He would die. 

As the pain only seemed to get worse, he tried to keep his screams at bay and his eyes began to close. Thoughts of everything filled his head. He watched behind his eyes as he saw his siblings smiling. He saw his parents and his room back in his small town. He thought of his brother in the next room. He wondered if the demon had done something to him which resulted in him not waking for any of this. But even in that moment… he didn’t get the chance to hope he was okay. 

His eyes opened again as the pain got white hot and it was searing. He looked down at Dean, his vision blurry with tears as he looked at the man he loved, barely being able to register the fact that he was screaming. He briefly thought that he would never get to tell Dean he loved him. He would never get to tell him how he truly felt. He wouldn’t go beyond this point…

Before he could pass out, he recalled the fact that all these stories ended with fire. The person burning up pinned to the ceiling. He tried not to register the fact that he could feel his body heating as he closed his eyes again, just hoping it would be quick and over soon. 

He had enough time to wonder, to think if he got the chance, would he do it all the same? Would he have stayed in his small town? But the answer was no. He wouldn’t trade his time with the Winchester’s for everything. He wouldn’t trade the memory of hustling pool with Dean, the other showing him how to play. He wouldn’t trade the memory of Sam taking him out when Dean was sleeping to bring him to yet another book store. He wouldn’t want to forget every moment he spent with the two. The good, the bad, the great, the worse– all of it was perfect in it’s way. 

So he would take his punishment for loving the Winchester boys. If that meant death… then it could take him. Because he wouldn’t have changed a goddamn thing. 

Dean had been looking up, watching Castiel the whole time as he went through everything. He watched as his eyes closed and he didn’t know if the other had passed out from the pain or if he was truly dead, hoping for the former. What was worse? He couldn’t do anything. He felt helpless and worthless. Not to mention this thing was going to kill him. It was going to kill Cas. 

“Dad!” he tried. “Dad, don’t you let it kill Cas!” he cried out. “Don’t you let it kill the only person I’ve ever loved! He’s the only one outside this family. Don’t let it kill him!”

Dean watched as the face of his father looked at him. He hoped he could reach his Dad but as the pain increased and he called out, he began to wonder if it was all for not. 

“Dean! No!” Sam cried as blood came from Dean’s mouth. He struggled to break free. He looked to the colt, wishing he could get to it or it would come to him– something. But nothing like that happened. 

“Dad, please,” Dean begged before he felt his consciousness slip from him. 

“Dean!” he cried, thinking that everything was gone from him. Until he heard his father’s voice. 

“Stop,” John said before Sam was suddenly let go from the wall. “Stop it.”

Sam didn’t know what was going on. He didn’t know if his Dad had taken control or something else but he didn’t take any chances. As soon as he was let go, he dove for the table and for the gun. He rolled, immediately popping back up as he aimed the gun, seeing yellow eyes turning on him now, his brother and Cas still held against their respective surfaces.

The demon gave a knowing smirk. “You kill me, you kill Daddy,” he said. 

“I know,” Sam counted before he re-aimed and took a shot for John’s leg. 

The bullet hit it’s mark; blasting a hole in John’s leg. Lightning seemed to erupt from the wound as well as through his body. The demon looked down at the wound before he dropped to the ground, Dean dropping as well. It wasn’t enough to kill him, obviously. But it was enough to stun him. Enough to weaken him.

When Dean dropped, Cas dropped as well and Sam reacted as quickly as he could, just barely catching him. “Cas! Cas. Come on, Cas, wake up–” he said, cut off by his brothers bleeding. “Dean? Dean, you both lost a lot of blood–”

“I’m fine,” he said as he forced himself up. He forced himself to a sitting position to take Cas in his arms. “Cas… come on, angel. Tell me you’re alive in there,” he whispered, feeling tears as his boyfriend’s limp body lay in his arms. “G-go check on Dad,” he demanded to Sam. 

“Dean–”

“Go!” he said as he held Castiel. 

Sam swallowed. He didn’t know if either of them were dead or alive but he wanted to do what Dean asked of him. 

As Sam went over, Dean felt Cas’ neck, waiting second to feel a pulse beneath his fingertips… but he felt nothing. He didn’t feel a thing and he only held him tighter. “No… No,” he muttered as everything began to go numb. “You’re not gone,” he whispered as he rocked Cas a little. “You’re going to be okay. We’re going to get you help. You’re going to be okay,” he breathed, though at that point, he didn’t know if he was talking to Cas… or himself. 

Sam peered at his father, not wanting to get too close so that if the demon was still in control, it wouldn’t have the drop on him. “Dad?” he asked, getting no response at first. “Dad?” he asked again. 

Suddenly John popped up a little. “Sammy! It’s still alive. It’s inside me, I can feel it,” he said like he was in immense pain just talking to him. Which it could have been. His father had managed to gain control of a demon which, from what he heard, wasn’t an easy feat. “You shoot me. You shoot me! You shoot me in the heart, son!”

Sam was confused. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know if he should out right kill the demon, the thing that had ruined his life on more than one occasion. The thing that he’d hunted for most of his life. It would be dead… but so would his father. 

“Do it now!” John dictated. 

“Sam, don’t you do it. Don’t you do it,” Dean muttered from his spot.

“You’ve gotta hurry! I can’t hold onto it much longer! You shoot me, son! Shoot me! Son, I’m begging you! We can end this here and now! Sammy!”

“Sam, no,” Dean begged. 

Sam debated and debated, not truly knowing what to do. Did he do this for his family? What would the reward be? Was he really willing to lose his father to kill this demon?

“You do this! Sammy… Sam…”

In an instant, John arched and yelled as the demon left him in a cloud of black smoke. They all watched as the cloud, once out of John, seemed to dive and disappear into the cracks in the floorboard. And just like that… it was over. 

  
  
Sam sped down the street. He didn’t know how fast he was going, but he didn’t much care. All he knew was that both his brothers… they needed a hospital. Dean was barely okay in the back seat, both emotionally and physically as his bleeding form held on to the limp, rather lifeless, Castiel. 

He didn’t know what to think. He too had leaned down and searched for a pulse on the man he considered a brother but when he found nothing, he’d felt tears. Dean had grabbed him and told him that if he started mourning he would punch him in the face. Because Cas wasn’t dead.  

Sam looked in the back at his brothers, wondering if Castiel really was,  _ truly _ , alive. He glanced at the way Dean seemed still, wrapped around him but his eyes were open and the way he clutched Cas… whispering… he knew there was no chance his brother was falling asleep or anything. Not before they got to help.

At that, Sam looked over at John who didn’t look all that hot either. With a gunshot in his leg, having been drugged just hours previous, and having to get control of his body back from a demon… he wasn’t shocked that his father had looked better at that moment. “Look, just hold on, alright. The hospital’s only ten minutes away,” he said as he sped up a little. 

His mind briefly flickered to Gabriel, who they’d had to leave in the cabin. It wasn’t ideal. Especially not when he’d vowed to himself that he would protect the other as soon as they got him to safety. But they hadn’t had a choice. He needed to get three out of the five of them to a hospital and this was how it had to be. He’d left Gabriel with a note and all the salt they had. It was the best that he could do in a situation like this. 

“I’m surprised at you, Sammy,” John muttered. “Why didn’t you kill it? I thought we saw eye-to-eye on this? Killing this demon comes first – before me, before everything.”

Sam looked in the rearview mirror at Dean, thinking about all the talks they’d had over the last few days. His eyes trailed to Cas before he looked back to the road. He thought about everything he’d been after lately. How he’d been hellbent on this mission and their cause. So hellbent that their most valuable weapon, the one that saved Castiel’s life… was almost left at home because he didn’t care about anything but revenge. 

“No, sir,” he shook his head. “Not before everything. Look, we’ve still got the Colt. We still have the one bullet left. We just have to start over, alright? I mean, we already found the demon–”

Sam was cut off sharply when all of a sudden, something slammed into the side of the car. He didn’t know what was going on, what had happened or what had slammed into them. What he did know was that the four of them felt the impact on all sides. He heard his father yell and Dean make a soft noise before they were out. He himself felt the pain of the crash, the blood that came from him as it happened. He felt it until the car skidded to a stop… and then it all went black...   
  


  
  



End file.
